[ggtina]

That about sums up my life right now.

My mom found out today I was off my meds and has been pressuring me to go to my next pdoc appointment. Which I flat out told her no. I've only been off my meds for a week I just wanted to feel somewhat like myself again. Sometime's I feel like the meds arn't really me.

Why is my mom a *****?
She says I dont help out around the house. Which i do but she seems to give credit to my kid sister saying I know how she cleans and i know you don't clean thaat way. Today she accused me of stealing towels? Liker seriously I have 1 in my room the same one I was told I could use for the week. Thats right people I get 1 towel for the week.

I'm 28 years old and because of me and my husband getting a divorce and me moving close to 500 miles back home. I'm forced to live with my mother and kid sister. Which ****in sucks. Well atleast till I get back on my feet. Which is proving to be a bigger problem all in itself. Trying to enroll in school so I can take advantage of the Post 9/11 GI bills housing allowance and yet take another year off from work. Making it almost 4 years I havn't really worked. I can't keep a damn job down. My pdoc wants me to work. So basically I need to find something part time.

Did I mention I am missing my 2 dogs like crazy ..... Blah I can't have them at my mom's house because her landlord says NO. I'm emotionally attached to them and no one really understands why. My mom says just let your husband have them or get rid of them. I always tell her No I can't do that. One time she said I'll buy you another dog if you get rid of these 2 once your settled. She has no concept of how heart broken I would be over that. Like none. She recycles animals like there newspapers. She doesn't care nor will she ever understand.

I really dont know what to right I'm just having a bad day ... maybe I should take my meds again tonight.

[Confusedinomicon]

I think your mom is right -- that you should continue medication.

It took me over 2 years before I found medications that allowed me to be myself, again. I basically lost a year and have no real recollection of most of it. But! It was worth it for me. (It kind of sucks I don't remember much of that year, but nothing really important happened except I got out of a hospital..XD)

Medications are tricky because no one is alike.

Going cold-turkey on medication generally leads to some relapse. I usually relapse after a week or two, which includes emotional outbursts, aggression and a mixed episode. Not fun! If you're going to quit medication, you should always look up withdrawal of each medication and try to find communities where people are tapering off those certain medication. Even if you don't find a community, it's a good idea to find out about how to taper because it will reduce the amount of withdrawal you feel.

I ONLY condone going off medication if you've done research and understand the ramifications of the medication and your possible future. You won't ALWAYS get withdrawal (Unless it's a benzo), but the chance is there.

I think talking to you Pdoc and looking for a change in medication (lowering or increasing or switching) would probably be best...or see if you can get your Pdoc to help you get off your medications in a safe way. ALWAYS tell them how you are feeling on the medication and what negative or positive side effects you're experiencing. If you feel like crap on it TELL them. It's their job to find a mix of medication that will help you...along with therapy if you're in that.

[KevinGetAwesome]

Yeah, keep trying with the meds and I find that going to work actually comforts me. Every shift I have to fake a smile, but by the end of it I am feeling pretty good. I take pride in that I get my **** done.