[KBee87]

I haven't been to a GP yet about any of this... so maybe I'm not... though I'm reasonably convinced I am. I've been completely consumed with the knowledge that I think I am bipolar for the past few days and it only happened because It was like I became detached from myself and could view my behaviour and feelings from an outside perspective.

Anyway, ever since I started thinking about this seriously

(side note: it is something i considered a lot for years but I was in a long term relationship with a guy who was bipolar so i've convinced myself that the way i feel is only because of him)

I've suddenly been able to make sense of my behaviour and the way I am. I know if I am bipolar it makes no difference to me... I'm still the same person but I kind of feel like this knowledge has helped lift this weight off my mind. Yet I don't think anyone will believe me. I'm not sure I believe me.

I'm really confused right now. It feels like i'm consumed by these thoughts that I can't control and i feel like i'm walking this line between being seriously down and absolutely elated about my existence.

I really don't know what the point of this post was. Sorry.

[canacrip]

Get a doctors diagnosis because there are different types of bipolar and other mental illnesses sometimes are very similar to bipolar. In fact, most people who have bipolar aren't diagnosed for several years. The average is eight. I'm talking about eight years of treatment before a proper diagnosis. Because you are more informed, it will be much easier, and faster, for your doctors to make the right diagnosis. I was diagnosed with chronic depression, among other things for ten years before I was given the proper diagnosis and appropriate treatment. I'm not saying this to scare you. Like I said, you are much more informed and self-aware, so the doctors shouldn't have any trouble. I wish you well.

KBee87, you sound very rational to me, and I think you must be a strong person emotionally. What you describe does not sound quite like bipolar illness, but I'm not a doctor, so I can't diagnose.

But something is going on for you to be able to stand outside yourself and observe what's happening within you. Do you use any kind of "recreation drugs" as they call them? (No need to answer--just check yourself on that and see if you come up with a "no".)

Otherwise, there might be something going on that warrants a trip to a psychiatrist just to rule out some things.

I think you'll be fine, and you have strength and courage to go ahead with your life whatever you find. And I think you're going to find that it isn't something major.

Take care and have a good week; keep in touch to let us know how you are.

Genetic

[Anika.]

There are also physical illness which can mimick mental illness. Thyroid conditions, celiacs, lupus, vitiman deficiancy , the list goes on and on, and not all these illness have obvious or apparent symtoms, so it really is important to see a doctor about your symptoms so everything else can be ruled out. There are even conditions that can cause psychosis and other mental problems like brain tumors, which can be silent but deadly.

Keep posting tho, and we can try to help you best we can.

[BlueInanna]

welcome and hope you find support you need here, i have. hope you're feeling ok tonight.

[Clinte89]

I hope things are going ok being consumed by thought can be quite troubling especially thoughts like that. But I would say get to a pdoc ASAP to get a dx it is always nice to know what's going on with yourself so you can be aware and more careful about things.

[Eliza Jane]

You mentioned talking to your GP and that can be helpful for ruling out physical causes for mental health issues. However, most GP's are truly horrible at making a proper BP diagnosis unless it is completely clear. In many if not most cases of BP the diagnosis is tricky. You need to see a psychiatrist if you have concerns about BP. If you had heart issues you'd see a heart specialist, if you have mental health issues, you need a mental health specialist.

Good luck,
EJ

[BipolaRNurse]

Eliza Jane is 100% correct on this one: most internists/GPs stink on ice when it comes to mental health diagnoses, and they're even worse at prescribing for them. The internist I've had for 20 years never picked up on my bipolar until this past winter, when I casually mentioned that I was half afraid of winding up in the newspaper for killing something or somebody, and THEN he referred me to a psychiatrist.

At the time, the idea was for me to get an eval and maybe 2-3 visits, and then I'd go back to my internal med guy for medication management. That didn't happen because I'm way out of his league in that department with the BP. In fact, my pdoc manages all of my psych meds now, including the Celexa and Ativan which were originally Rx'd by the IM doc, because I'm staying with him for the long term and I trust him to prescribe for me properly. He even advises me on my diabetes and vitamin D deficiency.

Now, it's not that I don't like my IM or trust him to care for my other ailments, but he's just not an expert in mental health, and that's what people with a disorder as complex and serious as BP need. Like someone else said, if you have a stomach problem you need a gastroenterologist, and if you even suspect mental illness, you need a pdoc/psychologist/mental health nurse.

[KBee87]

Thanks for the responses. I went to my GP today & got a referral to see someone about it. I don't know what to do with it, though. I'm kind of feeling a bit foolish now, like I'm being ridiculous. I just kind of feel like I've come down off this major high and now I feel ashamed and stupid. I'll keep you posted on what comes of it. I think regardless of what happens I could seriously benefit from talking to someone about it.

[Anika.]

Don't feel foolish, you are having some problems and need some help figureing it out. What if it turns out your feeling about this is correct, or even if it is not, you will be closer to understanding what is going on right?

The reason I mentioned physical illness is because this gets overlooked, and often, even by gp's, they can be quick to send people to a pdoc without investigating other common problems. Many many people get dx with a mental illness and years later discover it was a physical illness all along. It happens a lot. So make sure they explore this as well.

I hope your app goes well, and just try to relax, they will not think you are being foolish our wasting their time. Good luck

[Clinte89]

i agree feeling foolish is the last thing to do. WE have all posted things during troubling times. Its perfectly ok thats what we are all here for to support each other through rough times.

[MommaR]

Suggestion : take the sanity survey offered here and print out your results when you go see the p doc or therapist. I did and my p doc found the information very helpful. Just be sure you answer each question as truthfully as possible and avoid letting your knowledge of BP influence your leaning on ?s you aren't sure how to respond to at first. Try to really self-analyse and come up with the most accurate response.