2 steps forward and a 3 steps back

....this is why dreaming was invented!

drove past this woman today...actually I think it was her that drove past me...(I always study other humans)...looked to me she was completely off her face...!...but too damn calm even, about it?...so I believed she was just floating on some cloud like her life was exactly perfect

..so reactive I dwelled on feeling like an endangered species...like one of the last ones of my kind...knowing that I was facing the wrong way pretty much all the time and when I'm apparently walking forwards I am slipping further into the vacuum! the absence of purpose...into my distant future closer than my furthest past. bloody hell!..

...damn it I forgot what I was trying to write now?...took 2 steps of thought forward...discovered I was three steps behind confused the whole time.

...I guess a good 2 step thought is that if I never moved forward at all I would be so many 3 steps far behind my reality it would be suicide.

which means "so what! I slip and slide at least I keep getting up to experience it all over again...living is backwards and dying is forwards!

...and that woman?...well good on her I say....off her face...maybe what

I'm sure that curious humans sometimes watch me in my advanced state and consider my apparent euphoria to be a diabolical thing...a threat...but it aint...

and these backward steps....?
it's not about defeet

I surely admire your talent with words....
Have you ever thought to put any to music??
Or perhaps U R already famous musician/artist.
Just perhaps-ing out loud. Expressing some maybes.
Please don't take offence.

no offence nope no way....thankyou

but I'm just a silly monkey swingin' around in the alphabetical trees...!
I got Nirvana and Soundgarden to literate my ill-iterate...hehe...into tunes...

you are very kind...

(just realised I stuck an un-needed 'a' into the title ....it's funny when the title gets messed up...self explanatory this time)

I thought we all took 2 steps forward, 3steps back, until we learn how to take 3 steps forward 2 steps back, eventually maybe learn how to take 1 step at a time.

2 steps forward 3 back is probably better than stagnant... I'd rather have perpetual motion than no motion at all.

Ad Infinitum

This living, this living, this living..was always a project of mine

That's cool!!

I do like the optimism Anika...

but I surely believe at this moment that life is designed to take away more than whatever we give it...unless thats intellectual emotion?

..and we are designed to keep giving it....for an actual notion...

and yep...it's perpetual motion

The way I see it at least you made it 2 steps forward so on the scale your only at a -1 not so bad not is it your closer to 0 than you thought. Just keep making those small steps forward and before you know it youll be way ahead. Life is not a game so what is it to take steps in the wrong direction or positive direction. Hmm something to debate. And Monkey if you think about it we are all going to be extinct eventually because no one else is ourselves or that would just be weird. Yep plain weird. BUt dont feel bad about it there is nothing wrong with that.

I know James.. defectively optimistic ... I can't help that you know.

I guess I kinda see it like this. The universe likes opposites and balance. It's full of opposites.. good, bad, light, dark, stings and springs. The contradictions hold each other up. Without contradictions maybe the whole thing would collapse. And the universe it great at balancing, it does it with energy all the time.

I kinda think if we feel like we are giving more than we take maybe we are not taking what is there to be had. Or maybe we just can't see it, but I think it's still there.

Ok I'll shut up now. It's snowing again.. I should be soo lucky. I gotta go hang out with mom now... see the contradiction.. the balance... haha.

Ad Infinitum

This living, this living, this living..was always a project of mine

Perhaps that is exactly what all the ...described as holy books...are suggesting.

Such would indicate that there be an unlimited source from which to draw these "perpetual givings".
And my ATM card has been denied

Endangered species for sure... so special and sensitive it's amazing... yet they beat us down for it.

The boy I loved, my soul mate, who I pushed away, played me this Neil Young song on his guitar and sang it to me years ago. Etched deep in my heart, the most perfect day.

It's called "I've Loved Her So Long"

She's a victim of her senses
Do you know her?
Can you see her in the distance
As she tumbles by?
Veteran of a race
that should be over
Can you hear her sigh?
With wings to fly
She rolls along
Doing it wrong.

Oh, I've loved her so long
Oh, I've loved her so long
There's a place that I know
We could go
get away for a while
I can bring her the peace
That she needs
Give her reason to smile.

Oh, I've loved her so long

James

I am looking at this from a different view I think. You come here to PC and even when your feeling low, confused and just plain wore the hell out..... You offer support and love to people that probably need it more than you could know.

To me that is taking steps forward.. getting out of your own head and offering someone hope and comfort.. step after step forward my friend

If you kept on a 2 steps forward, 3 steps back path... You'd end up the same place around the world as if you'd gone 3 steps forward, 2 steps back.... In the same amount of time also. But on the backwards path, you can enjoy the scenery more.