Responding

I keep trying, like almost there. I start responses to so many threads here. But lately it's like I can't do justice to what I want to say or what I feel the thread response deserves to have said. So I'll write sometimes long responses, and then just back out, click back to read through all the threads again. Thinking, I will just come back later and write something better, or something more helpful, or something more meaningful.

It's so weird the over-thinking that my mind does. We are on a ball in space. A pretty ball, or a horrible ball, or a both ball. We circle around a star, one we are so close to that we call it a sun. Some people can't see the forest in spite of the trees, but maybe I'm caught up on the forest and can't see each tree, each moment, the ones I'm supposed to be "being here now", but oh there it went. I will try again on the next tree moment.

What if's aren't good for me, but what if I fail. What if every tree moment passes me by and then before I know it they're all gone. What if I waste this whole life I've been given. What if I see the answers later bright as day and wonder why I don't see them now. Maybe later I will understand that this just happens when spirit decalibrates into a human body.

I can't help but analyze... wonder... look for meaning. And out in that "real world" with all the cars and traffic and concrete and evil drug addictions, the people just see each tree, and they cut it or they smoke it, they make the most of each moment as they see it. I don't think they realize the forest, that we are a planet, we are a solar system, we are a galaxy, we are a sister to another galaxy, we are a universe.

that really did turn in to a well worded post.

really is ffood for thought

thank you for posting this

Thanks Shattered I have some pretty far out thinking.

Barely slept, had some odd short dreams, like watching some street musicians in New Orleans which turned into Paris. Then being somewhere snowy. The kind of dreams where I'm thinking, that was a waste of time, because I needed to be in deep sleep.

But laying there awake for so long in dark, a voice in me said, come back down Blue, come to earth and put your feet on it, this is the reality that needs you here right now. So I'm just going to deal with today. It's going to be minute by minute cuz I need to focus on work or I will be sorry. At least it is a very beautiful day. The blue color of the sky could make me melt. And tonight I will take ambien to make sure I sleep.

Thank you for posting this, very well put. I over think things as well, but have never been able to describe it. You really nailed it.

i look forward to reading more of your insights

you always have something amazing to say C...

like we are just the leaves on the tree...we hang there or blow around and touch each other....

...there must me trees on other planets in other galaxies.

...but no matter where the trees are?...there has to be wind to
we blow around all over the place just like leaves...
I'm real sorry when I sometimes don't get back to your posts....

j

And the leaf carries a grasshopper, and he holds on wheeeee. Could land anywhere, maybe a pond, and now he has a boat that has saved his life.

I'm very happy to see you J.

Very beautiful writing.

you are sweet kind C...
am not much good at the moment...
feel like one of them leaves that ends up on the ground...
gonna go lie down for a bit...

You'll get it figured out Blue. Sometimes we have to reflect to stay sane.

James - I hope your starting to feel a little better than leaf compost?

Yep Dan - I gotta do what I can to stay sane. (if I ever even was to begin with?)

Blue, I hope you're feeling better. You always get so much on your plate I don't think you need to apologize for feeling overwhelmed.