worse and worse anger issues

For the last few days I get really snappy about over very minor things, first it was my car getting stuck in the snow and becoming late to church due to it getting stuck and feeling like no one was bother to help me when I figured they could.

next it was coming home to a whole ton of things that frankly I knew where out of place...but got picked up and put away not by me by someone else.

I hate feeling that way... I feel like if other people do these things for how will I ever learn to cope with the issues myself.

I know I need to take help when i can get it...but at times it feels like just someone getting mad at me snatching the thing away from my arms doing it for me.

Yes I get that I have really bad, disorder and lots of them this means its harder for me to deal with things and cope with things that most people in their lives don't struggle with hardly at all.
But in a realistic sense I know that i have to be able to help myself with all this to some degree. There is not always going to be someone else there to help me or to hold my hand and frankly I am un sure if I want that.

I want to deal with my disorders and my issues myself. Although some days this feels utterly impossible.

I am meeting with phytraist tomorrow and I need to speak with her about quite a lot ....though a lot of my issue is I don't really know how to put all the things I want to say. But I need more then what I am doing now..and if it means putting me on a subtle dose of new meds in addition to what I am taking while I wait to....for the DBT therapy group then thats what I need to do...but I can't just go on and deal with these issues I have been having lately any more its just becoming too much. And I am afraid its gonna turn into too much for my friends and partners too if I am not careful.

Computer ate my post.

I'm sorry that Sunday sucked. You'd think people would at least try to be nicer that day. It is nice that someone picked up for you. You may want to tell them as much as they want to relieve your stress picking up gives you more stress.

But in a realistic sense I know that i have to be able to help myself with all this to some degree. Learning to help yourself also means learning when it's appropriate to ask for help. Your some degree may be small for now as you get a grip of things your some degree will get bigger but you don't want to overwhelm yourself and retreat.

Your pdoc should be able to help. Are you in individual therapy while waiting for group? My husband has recently found me "exasperating" but your friends and partners should understand. Do they know you have mental health issues?

When I was younger, my anger would be so great that destroyed a wall in my old house. Went right through the drywall and ripped it up lol. Took a door half off the hinges too. I would go into rages, absolute rages.

I understand anger lol. You are doing the right thing, no worries.

My girlfriend/ mistress is aware of it as her husband (boyfriend to me) as well as my boyfriend who is FtM (transgender femle that went to boy) they are all fairly aware of my issues but I am still getting used to this myself since last year I had utterly no answers to questions just simply questions.

there ar a few partners that don't know as well as they do but I always do my bes to be as open and honest as possible for thier sakes as well as my own.

It's only been a short time for you, give yourself and your partners time to adjust. Also, it's none of my business so disregard if you want, but I want to point out you have several repetitive dx's and may want to find out why.

my doctor's put me on lithium as of last week, kind of having a hard time adjusting to the side effects but everything seems to be a lot more in check now that I am on mood stablizers