[wildflowerchild25]

I know that's a strange title but it's true! Right now it's 10.45 and I feel like I can do ANYTHING I WANT and I want to complete all my IEPs for school, but the planning website can't handle me! It keeps kicking me out and inputting my goals wrong - it's so stupid.

But seriously, I can't believe how high i feel right now. I always told the doctors they were crazy for diagnosing me with bp2 six years ago because DAMMIT I NEVER GET MANIC. Not even hypomanic! But maybe I didn't know what manic was. I still think it's crazy because I can't understand why this could be bad!

Except I think some crazy things might happen at work if I'm like this tomorrow.

People have asked me if I'm ok at least four times today?! Because I'm moving so fast! But if I don't I won't get everything done and report cards are due on Friday along with two IEPs and many IEPs next week. I'm psyched that I can work on them from home.

I think this sounds a little like a crazy rant and I'm starting to get nervous. I'm not sure how high I'm going to get. I hope I don't do anything stupid. I hope I can keep it together at work. I've never experienced anything like this. When I was diagnosed six years ago I was going through other stuff - I was dealing with trauma from my childhood. I was never hypomanic, just straight up depressed and anxious and angry all the time. This is a little crazy. I can't control the volume of my voice, I'm yelling even when I'm not trying to and I'm talking even though I don't know what I'm saying.

And there's like a switch, if someone pisses me off, I feel like I'm going to kill them. I actually yell at my husband but I almost threw a game across my classroom today in response to another teacher being snarky (as always) to me - the students already left my room so my staff does NOT need to deal with them! Thanks!!!!! And I think that's probably bad since I'm a teacher in a behavioral school and I'm telling the students all day not to do crap like that.

I know I can do anything and I know I'm a great teacher and I know that all the haters can (insert whatever) because it's not my fault the students like me enough not to fight in my class! They don't want to destroy my stuff!

My body's telling me to sleep but my brain is like naaaaah get some more IEPS done!

I hope nothing bad happens. Can't call a pdoc so don't tell me to! I have a psych eval April 25th. My therapist can't see me till May. I'm on a once a month type schedule it seems.

Oh I hope I don't get banned for this...anyone have emotion regulation tips?

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

I know that's a strange title but it's true! Right now it's 10.45 and I feel like I can do ANYTHING I WANT and I want to complete all my IEPs for school, but the planning website can't handle me! It keeps kicking me out and inputting my goals wrong - it's so stupid.

But seriously, I can't believe how high i feel right now. I always told the doctors they were crazy for diagnosing me with bp2 six years ago because DAMMIT I NEVER GET MANIC. Not even hypomanic! But maybe I didn't know what manic was. I still think it's crazy because I can't understand why this could be bad!

Except I think some crazy things might happen at work if I'm like this tomorrow.

People have asked me if I'm ok at least four times today?! Because I'm moving so fast! But if I don't I won't get everything done and report cards are due on Friday along with two IEPs and many IEPs next week. I'm psyched that I can work on them from home.

I think this sounds a little like a crazy rant and I'm starting to get nervous. I'm not sure how high I'm going to get. I hope I don't do anything stupid. I hope I can keep it together at work. I've never experienced anything like this. When I was diagnosed six years ago I was going through other stuff - I was dealing with trauma from my childhood. I was never hypomanic, just straight up depressed and anxious and angry all the time. This is a little crazy. I can't control the volume of my voice, I'm yelling even when I'm not trying to and I'm talking even though I don't know what I'm saying.

And there's like a switch, if someone pisses me off, I feel like I'm going to kill them. I actually yell at my husband but I almost threw a game across my classroom today in response to another teacher being snarky (as always) to me - the students already left my room so my staff does NOT need to deal with them! Thanks!!!!! And I think that's probably bad since I'm a teacher in a behavioral school and I'm telling the students all day not to do crap like that.

I know I can do anything and I know I'm a great teacher and I know that all the haters can (insert whatever) because it's not my fault the students like me enough not to fight in my class! They don't want to destroy my stuff!

My body's telling me to sleep but my brain is like naaaaah get some more IEPS done!

I hope nothing bad happens. Can't call a pdoc so don't tell me to! I have a psych eval April 25th. My therapist can't see me till May. I'm on a once a month type schedule it seems.

Oh I hope I don't get banned for this...anyone have emotion regulation tips?

What helps me is breathing exercises, taking one thing at a time. But if I'm in a really bad place sometimes all that will help is meds. Before I went into a psychosis, and was not medicated I would just enjoy the mania. It's so hard when your mind is racing like that.

Hope I helped. Hopefully others will have better suggestions.