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GenCat
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Default Aug 30, 2013 at 03:49 PM
  #1
How can I find happiness again in my life? Each days seems always alittle more gloomier, darker and harder to fight it. I just want to disappear. I can't live without happiness like this anymore.

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bbdgurl
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Confused Aug 30, 2013 at 05:54 PM
  #2
I struggle to find happiness almost everyday!! Each day I just get more exhausted by the ups and downs, it really wears on me emotionally AND physically. I feel like I need more and more sleep everyday just to get by. I LOVE and ADORE my two little boys, but I find myself short tempered with them on my bad days and it breaks my heart to pieces to know I've done so. Everyday I feel like there is less and less hope that I will someday find a way to even cope with my symptoms. Just hoping to find a glimmer of hope out there somewhere that things will get better.......
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Default Aug 31, 2013 at 12:36 AM
  #3
So sorry. What a rotten way to feel.

Can you remember back to the last time you felt happy? What was happening then?

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Default Aug 31, 2013 at 12:45 AM
  #4
GenCat, try to find one thing, one tiny thing, that is good in life. When I am most depressed, I still make coffee every day. On some level, it makes me happy. It is a very small thing, but sometimes the small things that make us happy can lead to bigger things.

Also, try to do something nice for another person,sometimes that gets the focus off of me and can help.

Hang in there.
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Default Aug 31, 2013 at 01:20 AM
  #5
~ Listen to the rain. Feel the touch of tears that fall, they won't fall forever. All things come, all things go. ~

what is happiness? breathe and let yourself feel sad. follow your own insight.
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Default Aug 31, 2013 at 02:08 AM
  #6
I second that about coffee. It has a way of filling really empty spaces. Happiness for me is relevant. I read the news and learn about people with really BIG problems - or have really horrid lives, like in Afghanistan, Nigeria, or some other horrible place. In the recent news is some dude that lost EVERYthing - his wife, his kids, his job, his name is 4 inch print in the local newspaper - blasting the crime he committed - and is going to prison for 35 years. And I am unhappy? Not on your life - I'll celebrate my freedom & independence by a trip to a coffee place & have a frappuccino & be glad it isn't me on the front headlines.
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Default Aug 31, 2013 at 03:19 AM
  #7
*hugs*

I find happiness in my daily routine. Waking up to the sound of the birds, letting the horses out in the morning, going about my daily business, then coming home, putting the horses away, shower, dinner and bed. I always know whats next, I know what to expect, I feel relaxed and happy that I know this these things are going to happen every day regardless of where my mood is at.
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Heart Aug 31, 2013 at 04:03 AM
  #8
Have you ever been to a therapist or counselor? Therapy has turned my life around, made me happy again

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Default Aug 31, 2013 at 09:38 AM
  #9
Despite the fact that my family is a horrible trigger for me...

When I'm at my worst I go back to things that I feel nostaglic about - certain books or children's cartoons/movies. Or maybe I'll make myself some food that I had good memories about as a kid (grilled cheese or french toast usually). or things like that.

Even if they aren't things that I normally have in my life... I can remember how much they helped me hold onto a semblance of happiness when I was younger, and I find that that can help me even now as an adult.

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Default Aug 31, 2013 at 06:10 PM
  #10
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amelie10 View Post
GenCat, try to find one thing, one tiny thing, that is good in life. When I am most depressed, I still make coffee every day. On some level, it makes me happy. It is a very small thing, but sometimes the small things that make us happy can lead to bigger things.

Also, try to do something nice for another person,sometimes that gets the focus off of me and can help.

Hang in there.
A bowl of cereal and a bagel with blackberry preserves. That was the one thing I had to look forward to each day during my last depression.

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Default Aug 31, 2013 at 06:23 PM
  #11
One thing I do is to keep a gratitude journal. I write down one thing that I'm grateful for today. Or more often, if I feel especially grateful. Last Sunday my air conditioner broke down and it was 98 outside. It was 87 inside my apartment. I wrote that I was grateful for my refrigerator and ice cold water. It can be as simple as that. Someone once said that an attitude of gratitude can go a long way to making us feel happier in our lives.

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Default Aug 31, 2013 at 07:27 PM
  #12
I'm not fond of the word "happiness" I instead aim for " Content"

Today my pain level is at a 10 but I am content that I have my couch , laptop and TV to help distract me. I am working Mindfulness to pieces today.

Being Okay about how you feel and what you wish you could feel is a tricky one. Therapists are very helpful in this area.

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Default Aug 31, 2013 at 08:01 PM
  #13
Gratitude can go a long long way. Even when it feels as though there is nothing going right there is always something to be greatful for.

Midfulness is awesome for bringing a sense of contentment and even spontanious happiness.

I often think about the majority of the world and how lucky I am to just have been born in the right location. My country does not have a huge population so that is something to be greatful for. I don't have a lot compared to a lot of people living here. But globally I am sure pretty spoiled. I have food, and home, clean water, all my essential needs are met.

Sometimes I just think about how everyone or everything in the universe is connected and how I get to be apart of that. That brings me a lot of peace, makes me not lonely, just to know I am just aparr of the intrigual design of life.

Sometimes just taking a walk outside, just to feel the air, hear the sounds and see the trees or nature really helps to lift me up. Helps me feel connected, where as if I spend too much time removed from nature I start to feel down and disconnected.

Another is using my body. We have amazing bodies that can actually do pretty amazing things. Ever try doing yoga or something like that or just exercise in front of a mirror? I used to feel veey uncomfortable with that until I really started paying attention to the form of my body and the strength. Just taking time to appreciate the vessel that holds me. It's really a beautiful thing, you don't have to have the body pf an athlete to see how amazing it truley is.

I suppose most of these are about gratitude. But it really helps me to be aware of what I really do have and not what I don't.

GenCat, I hope you will be able to find that sense of happiness that you are looking for. I think it's always with us, and often it is just our perspective that needs a shift to feel it.

That saying "seek and you will find", often when we are depressed we "feel" like we want happiness, but our thoughts don't reflect that, we focus on the bad which in turn brings us more of the same feelings. We are not then truly seeking what we want, we are more or less seeking out more of what we don't want and we find it, even unintentionally. In my opinion of course only. But we are not always congruent about what we want and what we are doing, thinking, feeling, or speaking. I think to find true lasting contenment we need to work on having them become congruent, supporting and nurturing what we do want.

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Last edited by Anika.; Aug 31, 2013 at 08:17 PM..
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Default Aug 31, 2013 at 08:30 PM
  #14
I was going to add GenCat that it's not like we can just do all that overnight, it's a progression, and takes time and learning, learning more about ouselves and becoming more aware of what's taking place in ouselves, becoming more aware of how we can change these things. And we have set backs but that doesn't earase what we have learned, we just pick up where we left on and continue on. Eventually perhaps the new shifted perception becomes the norm and the old perspective shows up less and less, we become more aware of it and can shift it faster.

This has really worked in my own life very well. It took me some time, but I no longer deal with depression really. I feel it coming on very rarely but then take note of where my thoughts, actions, feelings and worss are at and I can usually see that they need some tweeking to get back on track to support where I wanted to be at.

Hope that might help you too.

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Default Aug 31, 2013 at 10:36 PM
  #15
yes set a plan to make coffee or whatever it is you like to drink or eat and jut do it with peace in your heart knowing you'll be able to enjoy it soon. i like lemonade in the summer too. for some reason lemonade makes me feel soo good.
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Default Sep 01, 2013 at 01:27 PM
  #16
somewhere a long time ago I read find one thing to love and love it with all your heart

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Default Sep 01, 2013 at 01:48 PM
  #17
Still looking. Have been all my life! Sorry can't help

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