[TheJettSet27]

"I'm more, more worried for you than for me." -"Cry Baby Cry", Throwing Muses.

Me: No, no, no. I don't want this. Please don't do this to me, brain!
Brain: Haha FUUUUUUUUU I do what I want

That's essentially what my brain and I have been saying to each other these past few days. Of course, I also get horrible insults and such thrown at me, but I don't really want to type those. I would probably end up crying and I don't want to do that, either.
Hell, I did it last night.
I feel horrible because last night I stared my mom in the face and lied. She asked me 2 questions: "How is everything going?" and "Have you been hurting yourself?"
In both instances, I said no, but that is a complete lie (not taking into account that small hypomanic episode a couple weeks back.)
I cried in bed and ended up texting a friend, making her the first friend to be aware of the self injury three months into a relapse. It's only been a few times, thank god, but still every bit as shameful as I remember.
On top of that I think I'm getting sick. I'm lightheaded and slightly nauseous. I have the Trent cough (named after Trent from Daria) in which I laugh a few times then start coughing.
Oh, and I've been sniffling.
Sigh. It's going to be a long episode.

[Victoria'smom]

I'm so sorry, those are two very personal questions. Try not to beat yourself up about lying. I've said those lies many, many times and its okay. Don't let your depression have more ammo.

[Lobster Hands]

Yep. I've said them too. Recently even. Don't feel so bad about it, but also realize that it is important for them to know.

I lie to my parents about it all the time, but I still wish they knew.

[LadyShadow]

Its okay if you lied. I am miserable deep down but I manage to put on a brave face to my family. I hate the way I look and everything about myself, but my parents and my sister don't know how much I secretly suffer.

You are not alone in your feelings.