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#1
May 02, 2014, 07:28 AM
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I keep going bad...
...I keep going bad.... I have feelings....I have very cool feelings... its not fair!....the only way I can communicate is desperate ridiculous... and I get shut down... fair enough....I kinda get it...... I WISH things were otherwise... I am going to be alone forever.... I decide to be alone... I am too tired of people being worse than me and they are in my heart.... so being mentally ill and full of emotion!... it's tricky.... I have feelings....maybe too many... love!....love ...love |
 Fuzzybear, gayleggg, waiting4, ~Christina
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#2
May 02, 2014, 08:23 AM
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Communication is something that is hard for a lot of people. I don't communicate well but have learned to like being mostly alone. I'm married and even manage to shut him out most of the time. Love is not easy. It's complicated and sometimes lets you down. I feel a failure at love and I don't think I can love anymore, except for animals. I wish you luck with love and find someone that appreciates your greatness.
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Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha  |
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#3
May 02, 2014, 08:40 AM
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 I don't like that your hurting and your head, heart and voice are not agreeing on how best to express it. People tend to dismiss others so it may not be you. Please don't give up on finding others to share your life with. You're such a good person don't decide to be alone for your preceved faults. You'd be doing the world a disservice. I know it's hard though.
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Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
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#4
May 02, 2014, 05:09 PM
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I feel this way a lot of the time, right now actually, but I'm trying to shake it. I don't believe a relationship is ever going to work for me, and I'm sitting in the ashes of the best one I've ever had. I'm reading two books on "Grief and Grieving", and they're helping, but it's hope that always eludes me.
That said, let's HOPE we're both wrong 
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-------------------------- 51 DX: Bipolar II |
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#5
May 02, 2014, 05:27 PM
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James you have a HUGE heart .. sometimes you just can't see it . trust me it is there
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Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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#6
May 02, 2014, 05:53 PM
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I don't think you're terrible at all! Lots of times I've read what you've posted and your words always meant something to me. ((((hugs))))
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 Sometimes the opening of wings is more frightening than the challenge against gravity. Both make you free..............the secret is perception. |
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