[wushuduck]

Could what I'm about to describe have been a hypomanic episode? I've been wondering about this since it happened about a year ago. It's all a bit of a blur so I might have forgotten a few things or got a few things wrong chronologically

Leading up to it I was low in mood for a good few months and that resulted in everything being to much for me and me drinking a bottle of Vodka and passing out by a motorway. It was a few days after that that what I think could be a hypomanic episode happened.

It was one of the worst experiences of my life. I didn't sleep for about three days, maybe longer, I can't quite remember. It lasted about a week and ended in me going to the hospital and being referred to a crisis resolution team.

The thing is, I didn't have elevated mood which most people describe when talking about mania/hypomania. Instead I was scared, extremely irritable, had bizarre thoughts that my mum was going to kill herself, that I had a brain tumor, that she was going to die in a car crash etc., my anxiety was higher than ever. I couldn't concentrate on anything, my thoughts were racing and my mum couldn't understand what I was talking about when I spoke with her. I was constantly pacing about in a panic. I started seeing things, like walls moving, things out of the corner of my eye, and a few times I heard voices. It built up so much that I ended up phoning the crisis resolution team one day and demanded that I see someone about my situation soon because I couldn't get through the next few days without doing so.

About an hour after I phoned the crisis team I saw a psychiatrist and she put me on Valium, which calmed me down, zoloft and zopiclone which helped me sleep, and that sorted me out for the most part.

I had a similar experience some months later (october, I think). I didn't sleep again for two or three days and I was seeing things again and heard a voice. This freaked me out and I went to the hospital again and saw the same psychiatrist and am now on Olanzapine (antipsychotic) as well as antidepressants, and my mood is now stable.

Does this sound like bipolar or maybe Cyclothymia? Could this have been a hypomanic episode?

Did the p-doc diagnose you? In my opinion, you could be describing a manic state because what you've described sounds very familiar to me. My p-doc called the agitated, irritable, paranoid, etc. mood a "negative hypomania". Whatever it's called, whatever it is, the feeling is AWFUL.

If the meds are keeping you stable, that's the most important thing.

[wushuduck]

No, I haven't yet received a diagnosis and I haven't told my current pdoc any of this and I'm not quite sure how to bring it up when I see her because our sessions usually consist of her asking me questions and not covering my full past.Thanks for your reply!

[Curiosity77]

It sounds like you experienced psychosis. That could be part of a manic or mixed episode, or it could be caused by other things. Do you have a pdoc or other mental health professional that can help you sort it out?

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[wushuduck]

Originally Posted by Curiosity77

It sounds like you experienced psychosis. That could be part of a manic or mixed episode, or it could be caused by other things. Do you have a pdoc or other mental health professional that can help you sort it out?

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Yeah, I have a support worker from an early intervention team who visits me every few weeks, and I'm going to see my psychiatrist in about four or five weeks, but I'm unsure how to bring what I've wrote here up in the session. I know I should have told her about this in my initial evaluation but for some reason I failed to bring it up.

[wushuduck]

Any suggestions as to how I can bring it up to my pdoc or support worker that I think I might be bipolar? I should have told them ages ago, I know. I feel like I'll look silly if I just say 'I think I might be bipolar'

[Hedwig3.0]

I have never had the type of mania that would make me think: I miss being high like that.

What are you trying to accomplish by telling them the thing from the past? Are you trying to be understood? Are you trying to understand yourself? Are you trying to be informative?

If I was trying to understand myself I might talk to a therapist about it. But if I have a 15 minute check-up with my pdoc I might just report how I have been doing lately.

If you are not sure how to talk about it you could write it like you have here and just ask the person to read it and ask them about it.

You just say it. You might feel silly as you speak, but you will probably not feel silly once the question is out there. If I were you I'd say, "So, I'm wondering about my diagnosis. What is it?" Or, "I'm wondering if I might be bipolar. What do you think?"

[Confusedinomicon]

I know in general sleep deprivation could cause the symptoms and it could have been precipitated by the drinking. When you talk to whomever make sure you include contextual stuff so they can better help you. This included telling them what was going on in your life when things happened.

[wushuduck]

Originally Posted by Confusedinomicon

I know in general sleep deprivation could cause the symptoms and it could have been precipitated by the drinking. When you talk to whomever make sure you include contextual stuff so they can better help you. This included telling them what was going on in your life when things happened.

Do you still think it's worth mentioning to my pdoc or support worker?