[biplol]

We have a routine every night.
My husband would go upstairs with my daughter, they'd read a book or story and then I'd go up and kiss her goodnight.
She uses these moments to be as sweet as she can (she is 7) and every night she says something that I don't know where she gets it from but that it does my day.
She seems to be pretty perceptive of whatever is going on in my mind.
And let me tell you, I should get an Oscar pretty soon, because I've had put some really good and credible acts out there.
Some days I feel like I can't do this "living thing" anymore.
But I know I would never forgive myself if I leave her here without a mom.
So anyway.
2 days ago she looked at me and in a really serious tone she said:
"You know, it'll be so sad if you couldn't cook for me because you are not here. I'm so glad you cook dinner for us every night"
.....
Do I have to explain how I felt and how I feel~

[LMo]

*gasp* omg - well, that settles it then. Almost eerie, but what a beautiful testament of the connection you two have

[darkeyes]

I agree, with what LMo just said.
Though she cannot relate,not being Bipolar, I must say that during that time in my life when I was DXed as being BP-II(when my hubby's indescetions caused me a meltdown and I felt suicidal) I sort of would have welcomed hearing something like that, helping me realize I was needed.
Since then, with meds,therapy,etc. I realized that we or our existance plays a part in our kid's life.
It was the very thought of leaving my son,that made me seek help, and not persue the "other" options.
Try, even in your darkest hours, that there are others who love you, even pets (if you have any) that your presence in their lives means so much.
To some it may sound like pressure, but to me was a "wake up" call,so I chose to carry on. With proper meds,pdoc and/or therapy carrying on is possible and even great! Take care, and know you matter.
DE

(((((((((((( biplol ))))))))))))))

[biplol]

{{{LMo}}} Thanks you, I know it sounds kinda... I don't know how to explain it, but it's true and beautiful. Thank you!

{{{DE}}}I know we have so much in common. I can totally relate to what you are saying, except that thanks God, my hubby is the best father and husband I could hope for.
Thank you so much Hon~

[undertheradar]

My daughter who is also 7 knows me inside and out. When I think I am done with this life, she almost always lets me know that she loves me more than anything or anyone. I think we get old souls as children to help us along our journey. She is the only thing that has stopped me from pulling the trigger or drugging myself to death. We are so blessed in so many ways with our children. Love you!!

[biplol]

{{{{{{{{{{Michelle}}}}}}}}}}}} you are so right, is the same for me.
Take care hon, love ya!

[darkeyes]

Oh things worked out with us,we've been married since 1978, and had dated few years before that.
He too, like yours, has been a good father to our only child, and most of our years together, even now, a good husband. When I look back 7rs ago, I can't believe life had gotten that dark, thank God time has passed.
Take care,
DE

[biplol]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{DE}}}}}}}}}}}}}} So glad to hear that, you deserve it hon~

[agony007]

That is so beautiful!! The bonds between us mothers and our children are so important and when u realize that your child is in tune with your feelings despite the fact that we try to hide it, shows that they have intuition and really know us better than we assume they do. my 8 year old notices when i am really depressed and on those days he is extra affectionate with me. he tells me he loves me every chance he gets. without my kids i wouldn't have the will to fight this demon that has come to make my life so difficult. i am so proud to be a mother because it keeps me on check. not only do my children depend on me but i depend on them as well. so funny that we have our children and are ultimately responsible for their well being. Yet we can also depend on them to lift our spirits and make it through the days.

[tspencer3]

I know EXACTLY how you feel! My daughter is 6 and she is so perceptive of my moods. She knows when mommy is sick and when mommy is well. She hugs and kisses me and tells me things will be alright when i'm the sick mommy. a few times she has crawled in my lap and cried with me. I too, could never leave those darling blue eyes without a mother. she is probaly the main reason my bipolar hasn't taken over my life and i'm still here!! Thank God for children.

[biplol]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Agony}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{tspencer3}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I can not say anyhting else to what you guys said in here. Thank you!!

[kmarie]

sometimes it takes something so small to realize what life is like. I lose it often and think about the easy road out but then a child can change everything maybe not forever, but for the moment you need it most. If anything, feed on her sense of you, no matter how young, it can make all the difference. P.S. She wants to grow old WITH YOU!!!! HARD TO REMEMBER ALL THE TIME, I ALWAYS FORGET USE IT AS A TOOL TO REMEMBER YOU ARE A WONDERFUL PERSON, NO MATTER WHAT DIAGNOSIS YOU CARRY WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE OR ANYTHING ELSE. LOVE T0 YOU MY DEAR AND YOUR SWEET SWEET CHILD

[January]

((((((((((( Bipol & daughter )))))))))))))

I am so glad you have each other. How blessed you are.

Hugs,

Jan