This might not make much sense...

My doctor decreased my Lamictal from 400 to 150 mg. The next day or day after that, I started to display symptoms of hypomania. The good hypomania was short lived because soon after, my mood became terribly mixed. I called her and she (well the doc she had on call for her--she was out of the office) increased my lamictal to 200 mg and my klonapin from .05 to 1.5 mg. Now, I am feeling depressed. Today I called her because I have not gotten better and have been having suicidal thoughts. Tonight, as I sit alone (my husband is in the basement, kids are asleep), I'm having strong suicidal urges. I have two random, unrelated questions. First, my doc thinks that the decrease in lamictal caused this horrendous episode. That would make sense except that it occurred just a day or two after the drop. I understand it should take a week or so for lamictal to leave your system. Any thoughts on this? Also, please can someone walk me through these suicidal urges? Just share what helps you. I don't want to go back to the hospital, please tell me it will all be alright. Hopefully soon I will post some non pitiful posts, sorry. Thank you all for your support.

You are supposed to decrease or increase Lamictal at 50mg/week intervals, max. Did you drop from 400 to 150 overnight?
If so, is your doctor an idiot???
That's a huge drop.

Hi hunny...I'm so sorry you are struggling so much these last few days. It definitely sounds like the decrease in lamictal made you have an episode. I'm glad you got a hold of the other pdoc but it sounds like it didn't help too much. The.klonopin should help ease any anxiety and help you sleep. I'm very familiar with.Sui ideation as I've lived with it for years. I recently came out of the hospitals iop program and learned some new coping skills. Try and clear yr mind of the intrusive thoughts by deep breathing and focusing on things that are important to you like yr family. One skill I do is called four square breathing. Take in a deep breath, hold for four seconds then exhale. Do this four times. Breathe deeply. Focus on outlining a square in yr mind as you do this. Ur going to get thru this! I know you don't want to go back to the hospital but if yr having big urges then it can keep you safe..Ur posts are never pitiful...we're here to support you. We're a soft place to land when things are falling apart. I'm also on lamictal 400mg a day. It's a great mood stabilizer. Why did they decrease it,? Were you feeling really stable? Can you talk to yr husband about these feelings yr having? Do you have a close friend you can call? You could also call a crisis line in yr area. I wish I had something to say that would make you feel better. If you want to talk you can pm me anytime...please don't hesitate to reach out. God bless you.

I am taking lamictal and I have seen some drastic changes in moods even when there has been a small decrease in meds or if I didnt take a dose for a few days (I wasnt able to get my script filled).

i do find my mind wonders a lot to suicide and to self harm. i write sometimes, like the thoughts might be from a story or a movie so I can try to distance myself from them. if the suicidal thoughts still remain i try to transition them into something not lethal, like torture and then I try to imagine it happening to someone else, so again i can try to distance myself from the thoughts,

I think about my family and what is important to me. my daughter, she is a baby now but i think about all the different things I want to do with her as she grows up. she will need me. and that gives me more reason then anything in the world to not have any more scars, to not hurt myself, to push myself to be healthy.

i duno, it's just a guess, pls dun be offended by what i say

i am just wondering if a small (or a weeny tiny part) could be psychological. it's like your know your dr decreased your med and in the deepest part of your mind (you may not be conscious or even admit to it) that you are losing a 'physical' / 'tangible' control over your illness or environment. So your body is unknowingly acting up a little, making it worse for you to deal with your symptoms. I wouldn't say you control you hypomania, but possibly the depression part. It's very much chemical things inside our mind that're affected and influenced by the surrounding/life events.

Dun worry, you're not be blamed. Just decreasing med by that much seems drastic. We all need time getting used to changes. Though you pdoc sounds absurd...

What was the reason behind the extreme drop in dosage? Side-effects?

I don't think she is an idiot but I do wonder if the change was supposed to be to 300 (ie: 1 1/2 pills TWICE a day--like maybe she left that off). I don't know.

Thank you very much for your wonderful suggestions! The decrease in lamictal was due to my strong urging. I was on so much medicine (I thought) that I encouraged my doctor to take me off of some of them. She agreed to try it slowly (this was the second med she was weaning me off of, I did fine with the first. I can talk to my husband about my feelings but I dread doing so because I know he will think (although not express) "here we go again"! Again, thank you so much for your support.

You might want to in the future to have the doctor write down your meds and the dosage .. It can get confusing when your starting stopping or weaning off a med .

Hope your feeling better soon

I had a lot of nasty intrusive suicidal thoughts during my last depressed episode. I did some things similar to what littlemiss said. I tried to use "Teflon mind", where you sit and meditate and picture something like a stream with leaves floating on it. Every time a thought comes in your mind, let it slip out and fall on the leaf and float down the stream. You can also use a clouds image. I'll admit, I was so low I didn't use my skills properly and suffered a lot more than I really should have, but when I was able to focus it helped. I stayed out of the hospital even hough my treatment team suggested it several times.

You can make it through this. It probably does have to do with the sudden decrease in lamictal. I'm no expert but it seems to be a much larger decrease than what should have happened.