[eina]

I've recently been diagnosed bipolar 2, not on any meds. I also struggle with severe social anxiety and chronic derealization. The last two weeks have been really strange and nightmarish. I don't know if it's some kind of episode? I'm just hoping for some insight. I am on mobile and very disjointed feeling so I apologize for how confusing this might come out.

Starting out I was just very anxious and agitated and kept seeing things move out of the corner of my eye. I kept having brief moments of jamais vu which used to happen a lot during depressive episodes especially, and just had a general unbalanced feeling like something was off. It got worse and at this point I am very disconnected and the derealization is severe, my brain is moving too fast but it feels blank- like an empty washing machine going around and around. I am antisocial but strangely even more pleasant than usual when in conversation. My self esteem has gone up and down and up and down and I self harmed for the first time in six months. I don't even know why.

Everything feels wrong and hollow and I am indifferent to everything, I am eating too much and laying around and my body feels tired and achy and has muscle knots like I get when I am stressed. I feel extremely wired all the way through my body like I am waiting for something to happen but too dull and unfeeling to bother with anything. I feel like something plugged into the wrong power source, like I have all this energy running through me but I can't utilize it even though I am running on empty. Underneath it all is this horrible crazy feeling, I can't describe it I just wake up feeling crazier every day. I feel like I am losing my mind, and every minute is agonizing.

I have had all of these symptoms before but never in this arrangement, never together. I am really confused and lost and halfway convinced I am losing my grip on reality.

Help?

[pawn78]

You are in a mixed episode. Tell a doctor about it, it sounds like a strong episode.

[cashart10]

Yes, please call your doctor right away. He/She will probably prescribe you some medication, like an anti-psychotic (unless you are opposed to taking it?). I hope you are feeling better soon. Keep us updated.