[husbandwithbipolar]

Me and my husband, who is bipolar and had ADHD got into a huge fight(well not so much a fight,he was screaming at me) over something so small and stupid. Thos rant went on for a good 20mins. we were on our way to visit his parents. But he drove past their house and went home. When we got home he jumped out the car and started taking stuff out the car. I asked him for the keys, jumped into the driver seat and went to his parents.

After about an hour or so I went home to take him food and check if his okay. He was sleeping. I woke him up to tell him I brought him food and to ask if he wants to come back with me. He told me to just go cause that is what I'm good at. I tried to explain to him that I left so that he could calm down cause I didn't want it to end in a big fight. I couldnt stay at our place cause our area has no electricity and we have a small baby. I explained that to him all he kept saying to me was....just go.

Eventually I left. Did I do the right thing? Should I have forced him to come with me?

His alone in at home with no electricity, his phone has no battery power. I'm worried about him but I also don't want to force and upset him more

What do I do?

Help!!!

[Standup2me]

Yes, you did the right thing
He appears to have been very manic.

When somebody is manic, it is pretty impossible to force them to do anything they don't want to

In my opinion, you put your baby's and your own safety first, and that will
never, ever be the wrong thing to do

You were brave and strong.
Good on you!

[tipper1492]

I think seek out a professional for yourself, if not for you both. A professional may want to see you, and him at different times. I'd guess you can not read his mind. I hope others jump in here with better ideas and experience. I hope things get better for you both.

[husbandwithbipolar]

Originally Posted by Standup2me

Yes, you did the right thing
He appears to have been very manic.

When somebody is manic, it is pretty impossible to force them to do anything they don't want to

In my opinion, you put your baby's and your own safety first, and that will
never, ever be the wrong thing to do

You were brave and strong.
Good on you!

Thank you, I needed to hear that. I never know when to just leave him or when to stand up to him cause I can never tell where his minds at.

[husbandwithbipolar]

Originally Posted by tipper1492

I think seek out a professional for yourself, if not for you both. A professional may want to see you, and him at different times. I'd guess you can not read his mind. I hope others jump in here with better ideas and experience. I hope things get better for you both.

We are going to see someone. We found a new therapist. I hope she can with how to deal with him when he gets like this cause I never know if I'm doing the right thing.

[Victoria'smom]

I'd guess mixed state IE. Take the worst symptoms of mania the mash them with the worst things of depression and then you have the loveliness of a mixed state. Don't engage the fight, avoid fights. You absolutely did the right thing. If your worried you could always do a wellness check but that seems a little extreme.

[husbandwithbipolar]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

I'd guess mixed state IE. Take the worst symptoms of mania the mash them with the worst things of depression and then you have the loveliness of a mixed state. Don't engage the fight, avoid fights. You absolutely did the right thing. If your worried you could always do a wellness check but that seems a little extreme.

Omw that sounds hectic. What is a wellness check?

[Victoria'smom]

Usually, it's done by Community Mental Health Team to make sure he's not at risk of hurting himself/others. It can lean to hospital.

[nbritton]

Originally Posted by husbandwithbipolar

Eventually I left. Did I do the right thing? Should I have forced him to come with me?

I don't think you should have forced him to come with you. Give him space, and know that it's likey his disorder that your dealing with.

[nbritton]

Originally Posted by husbandwithbipolar

Omw that sounds hectic. What is a wellness check?

A wellness check is when you have the police go check if he's doing alright. Unless you think he is suicidal I would recommend not doing a wellness check. I've had family do this to me and I don't like it. When I get depressed I just what to be left alone, having the police come to my house would likely cause me a panic attack.

If he asks you to leave him alone, then respect that, tell him ok, I'll be here when you're ready, and walk away. Are you still at his parents? Since he doesn't have a phone, and presumably a car, I would go check in with him again. Maybe leave your phone with him and take his phone so you can charge it up.

[husbandwithbipolar]

Originally Posted by nbritton

A wellness check is when you have the police go check if he's doing alright. Unless you think he is suicidal I would recommend not doing a wellness check. I've had family do this to me and I don't like it. When I get depressed I just what to be left alone, having the police come to my house would likely cause me a panic attack.

If he asks you to leave him alone, then respect that, tell him ok, I'll be here when you're ready, and walk away. Are you still at his parents? Since he doesn't have a phone, and presumably a car, I would go check in with him again. Maybe leave your phone with him and take his phone so you can charge it up.

Oh okay,I will remember that for the future.

I came home this morning to check on him. He was up and about but he didn't really want to talk. All he kept saying is leave me alone. I packed a few things for me and baby and I'm going back to his parents.

I know he wants to be left alone but it's so hard for me to leave him like this.

I know the answer is probably no but I'm going to ask anyway. Is there any way I can snap him out of this episode?

on the bright side, his still taking his meds...usually when he gets like this he stops taking them.

[Justugh]

hi nice lady

ummmmmm .....as for the right thing that is always hard .......but the simplest place to start is be yourself ......something about u makes him happy when the chemicals in the head are lvl ...it is why u got married or hooked up in the first place ....so be that if u were always a worry wort when ever sick or something then be your worry wart self .......your the new stable rock in the sea of life ......so just be yourself and u will never go wrong

the rest of what i know would be censored out most likely before it gets to ya
but the simple fact sounds like hubby is in bad place if sleep does not readjust him by the morning it will be time to call his doc and the hospital and get something to lvl him out before the big crash comes ...........as his wife if u think he is in danager u can have him held on a 72 hour ....by calling his doctor and telling her she will be able to get his file and stablize him faster (hospital is the best place for the quickest results in meds ...blood test and all that on site plus they have rooms stocked with all the meds u could need onsite )

rage over little things is one of the last signs before something crazy/dumb happens with me

[nbritton]

Originally Posted by husbandwithbipolar

Is there any way I can snap him out of this episode?

No not really. You could try makeup sex, it would help you two feel closer.

[husbandwithbipolar]

Originally Posted by nbritton

No not really. You could try makeup sex, it would help you two feel closer.

Lol!!! Hahahahahaha!!! I actually did try that. all I got was a from him was "seriously???"

[Crazy Hitch]

It's a nasty situation.

He is not well and is not making rational decisions right now.

It's six of one hand half a dozen of the other.

You could stay away as he's ordered you to do. He seems really angry at this point in time. And he did tell you to leave ....

If you return, you could face his wrath again because of his mental instability right now.

You need to do what makes you and your baby safe right now. Whatever choice that may be.

Wishing you well.

[Standup2me]

Originally Posted by Hooligan

It's a nasty situation.

He is not well and is not making rational decisions right now.

It's six of one hand half a dozen of the other.

You could stay away as he's ordered you to do. He seems really angry at this point in time. And he did tell you to leave ....

If you return, you could face his wrath again because of his mental instability right now.

You need to do what makes you and your baby safe right now. Whatever choice that may be.

Wishing you well.

I totally agree. The anger issue can be a dangerous thing.

Safety, for yourself and your baby, are the highest priority here.

[Curious651]

Need to take care of ourselves before we can help others.

[husbandwithbipolar]

Thank you everyone for all the advise and support. You guys really made dealing with this so much easier. I didn't realize how talking to people who know what in going through can help so much.

Last night we came home. My husband called me and asked me to please bring him smokes. When we got home he said I could stay. Last night was very touch and go. He still wasn't talking much and small things were still irritating him. This morning I woke up and went to church. When I got home now he was back to his usual self. Very chatty and bubbley. His busy now making breakfast on a fire as we still have no electricity.

THANK YOU AGAIN!

[Justugh]

Originally Posted by husbandwithbipolar

Thank you everyone for all the advise and support. You guys really made dealing with this so much easier. I didn't realize how talking to people who know what in going through can help so much.

Last night we came home. My husband called me and asked me to please bring him smokes. When we got home he said I could stay. Last night was very touch and go. He still wasn't talking much and small things were still irritating him. This morning I woke up and went to church. When I got home now he was back to his usual self. Very chatty and bubbley. His busy now making breakfast on a fire as we still have no electricity.

THANK YOU AGAIN!

nice lady

he is on a upswing right now ............use this to get him to see a doctor to stabilize the swings before the next down one

this is bi polar the start off small and as each cycle goes they gain strength the highs get higher the lows get lower
untill the lows get so bad hurt self to stop it or the high is so manic do something bad and get in deep trouble with law (i feel like a god times)

[husbandwithbipolar]

Originally Posted by Justugh

nice lady

he is on a upswing right now ............use this to get him to see a doctor to stabilize the swings before the next down one

this is bi polar the start off small and as each cycle goes they gain strength the highs get higher the lows get lower
untill the lows get so bad hurt self to stop it or the high is so manic do something bad and get in deep trouble with law (i feel like a god times)

I will do just that. I've made an appointment for us to go and see his psychiatrist and a new psychologist next week.

[Justugh]

Originally Posted by husbandwithbipolar

I will do just that. I've made an appointment for us to go and see his psychiatrist and a new psychologist next week.

good luck nice lady ............the more u can distract him thinking in loops the longer the cycles will last .........plus turkey day is right around the coner keep him stuffed with turkey/football.....natural trank

[husbandwithbipolar]

Originally Posted by Justugh

good luck nice lady ............the more u can distract him thinking in loops the longer the cycles will last .........plus turkey day is right around the coner keep him stuffed with turkey/football.....natural trank

We live in South Africa so we don't have all that but our family is a very big on Christmas so I will use that as a distraction