Two times now I have been hospitalized because of my mania. They say I was psychotic, but in my mind I wasn't. My mania makes me feel like I'm having a really good LSD trip (I've never taken LSD, but from the way it's described I think it might be similar). Colors are brighter and more vibrant, I have a heightened spiritual awareness (I could feel my recently deceased grandmother's spirit, don't laugh). I felt good about my body for the first time in months....now I'm on albilify, lithium, and zyprexa and the mania's gone. I know it had to go at one point or another but I wish I could get it back again, and maybe next time around I'll be more discreet. Is that possible? To learn to control your mania so it doesn't freak others out and want to hospitalize you?
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