[wiretwister]

someone asked me the other day to describe any "manic episode" I had. Well I could not,, I tried to remember my inpatient because that was were my pdoc said I was so messed up, He said "I was not myself" when I pressed him. What is so strange to me is I have almost no memory of the time,,I had to ask my wife how long I was even there..I though three days she said a full week.. I remember maybe two meals and almost nothing else except fleeting flashes,,I lost a full week of my life,,I have no idea what I may have said or did during that week..

Does anyone else have an experience like this,, does this even sound bp?

Really just had to write this down to see it in print,, please forgive the length...

[Velouria]

This wasn't at all lengthy.

I have heard about a sort of "amnesia" happening with mania. A friend of mine with BP experiences it.

I believe I have experienced it too, but I am not certain. Apparently I stopped talking to that same friend for a period of time, and I don't at all remember when it happened, or why.

I'm sure I have had other instances of this, I just can't pinpoint them. There are things people tell me that I've done or said, or that I've been engaged in, that I can't recall at all, but that might be due to other factors. I'm not certain.

I tend to also find a lot of stuff I've written that I have no recollection of writing (prose, poems, short stories).

[wildflowerchild25]

It happens to me in depressed episodes. Seems like time just keeps moving and I slog through, then i "wake up" and realize it's been three months and I hardly remember what happened. My cycles have shortened to about two weeks so it doesn't happen much anymore but in my teens it was a real problem.

[cashart10]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

It happens to me in depressed episodes. Seems like time just keeps moving and I slog through, then i "wake up" and realize it's been three months and I hardly remember what happened. My cycles have shortened to about two weeks so it doesn't happen much anymore but in my teens it was a real problem.

This was also an issue in my teens but not anymore. My mom will mention major things that I said or did while in an episode in my teens and I will have no recollection. To my knowledge though, it doesn't happen anymore.

[tailie angel]

I've experienced this before. My doc was very concerned. Also my sense of time is horrible. I can't say if something happened yesterday or a month ago.

[Velouria]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

It happens to me in depressed episodes. Seems like time just keeps moving and I slog through, then i "wake up" and realize it's been three months and I hardly remember what happened. My cycles have shortened to about two weeks so it doesn't happen much anymore but in my teens it was a real problem.

That also kinda happens to me too -- the "waking up" part. There are periods of time where I feel like I'm waking up from a coma.

[Confusedinomicon]

You're experiencing "Mood-dependent memory!"

Mood-dependent memory - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Mood Memory

I have this problem, too. My boyfriend told me the same thing for about 4 or 5 years when I would be in panicked depressed states and I have vague recollections of the things I've said and done in different mood states. The memories are more vivid for him than me and I feel like I've disassociated from those states. Anyway, this theory explains a possibility for why it happens.

[Velouria]

Originally Posted by Confusedinomicon

You're experiencing "Mood-dependent memory!"

Mood-dependent memory - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Mood Memory

I have this problem, too. My boyfriend told me the same thing for about 4 or 5 years when I would be in panicked depressed states and I have vague recollections of the things I've said and done in different mood states. The memories are more vivid for him than me and I feel like I've disassociated from those states. Anyway, this theory explains a possibility for why it happens.

Ohh, that's like state-dependent learning!

Thanks so much for sharing this!

[~Christina]

This happens to me in times of major episodes, Altho seemed to happen more often when I was on medications. The human brain can only handle a certain amount of mental or physical stressors. Its often a safety feature the brain falls back on.

There are many times when mental or my physical pain becomes to much that I lose track of hours or days, But I know when its happened and I am home , I go through the motions of everyday , cooking cleaning etc, but my husband can tell I am just not totally "here" my Husband, T and I have come up with a check list as for making sure that I am safe to be home, Just because I lose time doesn't mean I must go IP. Yes its a fine line at times, but its workable , I have a great support system , I am lucky.

I would say that if anyone is losing time they need to report it to there T and Pdoc, It might be BP related or something physical.. Its always best to take a closer look and decide how to manage any possible problems.

[HALLIEBETH87]

I have had some meds cause this, I think. But I have also experienced this when Ive gone through hypomania stuff. Its distressing to look back and realize youre not sure what you did during that time.

Hope things are going better for you now.

[Velouria]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

There are many times when mental or my physical pain becomes to much that I lose track of hours or days, But I know when its happened and I am home , I go through the motions of everyday , cooking cleaning etc, but my husband can tell I am just not totally "here" my Husband, T and I have come up with a check list as for making sure that I am safe to be home, Just because I lose time doesn't mean I must go IP. Yes its a fine line at times, but its workable , I have a great support system , I am lucky.

I want your coping skills.

Yes I lose time and memory during episodes. I barely remember any of last year. My pdoc says it my brains way of protecting itself from the trauma I experienced in the mood state.

[jacky8807]

You are definitely not alone in this. I have a major issue with this during mAnia and when i have a really bad mixed .
These issues we deal with are tough but atleast we can all have this great community of understanding to help us through!
:hug:

[lunaticfringe]

YES memory is a huge problem for me. My SO gets sad sometimes cause I can't remember things we've done together. Also like you said I remember almost nothing from both hospitalizations. Also I find if someone asks me something time-related (i.e. "When did such and such happen?") it takes me a very long time to recall and get a rough estimate. Seasons and years get all mixed together in my mind. Also random words. My retrieval is very poor.