[Becoming]

I have this friend who never follows through on anything. My bipolar is acting up lately (I feel VERY angry...but I can't 100% pinpoint anything else except for stress...I'm too busy to tell how I really feel or what phase I could be in right now). Anyway, she's -point blank- pissing me off! She always says "let's go get dinner" or "let's go get lunch" and NEVER shows up! She initiates it. She invites. She DOESN'T show up. What the hell?!

She also talks about her boyfriend almost 24/7. It's like she cannot do anything else! I know people like their significant others and all, but talk about them within reason! Sometimes I just want to call her out or to tell her to just shut up.

She is also always "sick." If she is sick as much as she says she is, then she needs to get a new immune system. I swear she is sick every week or every other week. But I really think "sick" is her default excuse to get out of things she does not want to do. I think she's making excuses and lying.

She is so annoying and I am trying so hard not to be really mean to her. I just am not having people's crap lately and she's dishing out a lot of it. So hard not to light into her!!!! All this I am saying is REALLY mean and I would hate for it to come out in person. I feel like maybe I don't even want to be friends with her anymore because this is all she does: annoy me, lie/make excuses, and talk about her stupid boyfriend.

Anyone have any suggestions how I can avoid flipping out on her? My buttons keep getting pushed and I don't want to explode on her.

[kaliope]

i wonder why you are even friends with her. it sounds like all she does is hurt you. you dont mention any benefits you are getting out of the relationship. maybe you arent discussing them now because you are so mad. try putting together a pro/con list of the advantages and disadbantages of having her for a friend. if there are more advantages then change the topic each time she talks about her boyfriend and decline any invites so you dont become upset when she doesnt show up. if there are more disadvantages then slowly disengage from the relationship by not calling her anymore, letting her know you dont want to see her. etc.

[Crazy Hitch]

Hi Becoming,

This is just personally from my experience.

Sometimes when my mood is a little bit unbalanced I can get quite triggered by some people.

I tend to distance myself from people I may find triggering during an unbalanced mood phase.

Hope this helps.

[Becoming]

Originally Posted by kaliope

i wonder why you are even friends with her. it sounds like all she does is hurt you. you dont mention any benefits you are getting out of the relationship. maybe you arent discussing them now because you are so mad. try putting together a pro/con list of the advantages and disadbantages of having her for a friend. if there are more advantages then change the topic each time she talks about her boyfriend and decline any invites so you dont become upset when she doesnt show up. if there are more disadvantages then slowly disengage from the relationship by not calling her anymore, letting her know you dont want to see her. etc.

Yeah, I'm not 100% on what I'm getting out of it anymore. When she suggests things I usually just say "maybe" or just completely ignore them because it's usually by text.

Originally Posted by Hooligan

Hi Becoming,

This is just personally from my experience.

Sometimes when my mood is a little bit unbalanced I can get quite triggered by some people.

I tend to distance myself from people I may find triggering during an unbalanced mood phase.

Hope this helps.

She is triggering for sure. I should certainly distance myself or I could flip out. I did that years ago and am trying to be a better person now.

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