so my coordinator said I'm mixed and mother thinks I'm attention seeking

F uck off mother i am not f ucking attention seeking. F uck you f uck you. You don't know how much i want to throw stuff at you now. I'm so irritated right now. I didn't choose to be like this. How dare you say i am attention seeking!!!!

*hugs* I know you've been suffering a while.

Why does she think you're attention seeking?

I keep forgetting my meds and she said only a 2 year old says that and how I need to control my spending but she doesn't support me at all!!! Just f ucking punched a sink right now

Oh I hear you about the meds thing! I need alarms in my phone to remind me... my father forced me to use a new phone (took out the microsim from my sim so I could no longer use my old phone) and I couldnt figure out alarms on it, so for MONTHS I was having trouble remembering my meds. He told me to stop blaming the phone... If I had an alarm I dont forget. Have you tried that?

Money is another issue... I never have any to waste. Cant you restrict your own access?

idk idk. Idk what to do...she shouted at me for putting my debit card in a bag off water in a freezer so I can't do that and they won't take it away for me. They just tell me control it
I feel like crying so much and my chest is so tight
I want to scream. Yeah telling me to get a grip constantly by my parents doesn't help either

still angry even after a cycle

I am sorry to hear that you and your mom are having such a hard time
I had a tense relationship with my mother as well. It has improved over the years, but we still have our differences. I met with the same attitude from her(at times), and from other family as well.
My mom and rest of my family (most of them) have finally accepted the fact that I am too sick to work. Some of them are actually really supportive now. Work was a big issue with them. I was told to just pull myself together, and all of that...
My brother also have BP, but he does much better than me, and they seemed to think that then so I should I.

The reason I tell you my story, is to lead up to what I want to say now. I wondered why it was so hard for my family to accept. I took a step outside my own perspective, and looked at my situation with their eyes. Knowing that they love me, how could they be so insensitive?
I realized that one reason was that they love me. Therefore they want the best for me. That made it hard for them to accept that I have a serious, cronic illness. I mean, I think I would have a hard time accepting that my teenage son was bipolar, because I love him so much, and I don't want him to live with BP! But of course I would be more accepting because I have BP myself.

Parents love their children passionately, and it is sooo hard to come to terms with a possible cronic illness in their child. As a mother, I can tell you that it is really horrible to see your child suffereing. Nothing worse in the world for a mom. And it is the most painful thing in the world for her to face. There is so much pain behind her behaviour towards you. She really, really want the best for you. But she might not know how to cope in this situation. Not right now. And you are struggling with your own distress also.
I don't know if this is helpful for you rigth now, but I wanted to share this. Because even though our situations are different, I understand what you are dealing with. Been there!
Much love and good thoughts from me

P.S. Keep posting! Let us know how you are doing. And I hope it helps you to share also.

yeah I get what you mean. It is hard for my parents and it's hard for me when they just don't get it when I am feeling scared and paranoid over the smallest things. My mother told me to calm done in the end because I was so angry.