[Hashi/bipolar mom]

I'm curious if any of your work colleagues or non close friends would even know if you had BP or not. It seems like in the news or just in general with people that BP has a stigma. I was very successful in my career and made lots of friends (not really now since I've moved and I'm plain tired, LOL). I was recently diagnosed with BP, due to ongoing manic episodes that would happen 3-4 times a year. They got worse as I got older.

Why do people think we are just plain crazy or should be under a bridge somewhere? Anyone else been successful in your career and have friends but no one would even know?

BTW, I have a few friends that I would consider BP but of course I'm no pdoc (and who am I to diagnose them) and are very successful! In fact one is semi famous and I think they might be BP. What gives?

Curious!

[gina_re]

I've told a couple of people at work I feel comfortable with about my diagnosis. And once I do, I get the "I wouldn't have known if you didn't tell me" response. So I think if you're stable, it's not even noticeable, I think it becomes an issue when the depression sinks in, because that can be harder to hide than the hypomania I experience. Luckily my hypomanic episodes don't include irritability so much thanks to my mood stabilizer (at least I think that's what's going on).
I think what keeps the stigma going is that when there is some mass shooting, it's usually mentioned afterward that the person has some sort of "mental issue" and it makes it seem like people with MI are violent when in fact we are not.

Edit: I do consider myself successful in my career, I've bought my own house, have a good job, have a nice car etc.. all on my own

[Hashi/bipolar mom]

Gina,

That is so awesome! Yeah, I actually think the hypo-mania really helped my career. It was really only my immediate family that saw the bad side of things and my medicating with alcohol.

I'm glad I'm not alone in this! There are definitely people that I've recently met after moving here that I would NEVER tell. They would be running for the hills. The moms around here are ruthless and gossipers. They wouldn't try to understand it.

I try not to disclose much. I just tell them the good stuff!

[mom2trips+1]

I got through college, medical school graduating first in my class, and had a 19 yr long career as a physician with BP. I wasn't diagnosed officially until about 8 yrs ago but looking back I had BP as a teenager and beyond. I certainly was successful but my BP got worse as I got older and medications aren't always effective.

The stress of work ( in addition to 4 kids) eventually was too much and I retired at the age of 47 last year. But,yes, you can be successful. And even though I am unable to work now, I consider the career I had a successful one. While I was working, I don't think people would notice the hypomania, but I would miss work due to depression and depression is hard to hide ( especially when crying during work.)

Now, if I become close to a friend and decide to tell them I have BP they are always shocked. (That is because I hide in my house when I am depressed and don't let anyone know except my husband. ) My friends only see me when I have mild depression or have a stable mood or maybe a little hypomanic.

[mom2trips+1]

I got through college, medical school graduating first in my class, and had a 19 yr long career as a physician with BP. I wasn't diagnosed officially until about 8 yrs ago but looking back I had BP as a teenager and beyond. I certainly was successful but my BP got worse as I got older and medications aren't always effective.

The stress of work ( in addition to 4 kids) eventually was too much and I retired at the age of 47 last year. But,yes, you can be successful. And even though I am unable to work now, I consider the career I had a successful one. While I was working, I don't think people would notice the hypomania, but I would miss work due to depression and depression is hard to hide ( especially when crying during work.)

Not me never was....life's been a struggle...and still is.

[Hashi/bipolar mom]

Originally Posted by mom2trips+1

I got through college, medical school graduating first in my class, and had a 19 yr long career as a physician with BP. I wasn't diagnosed officially until about 8 yrs ago but looking back I had BP as a teenager and beyond. I certainly was successful but my BP got worse as I got older and medications aren't always effective.

The stress of work ( in addition to 4 kids) eventually was too much and I retired at the age of 47 last year. But,yes, you can be successful. And even though I am unable to work now, I consider the career I had a successful one. While I was working, I don't think people would notice the hypomania, but I would miss work due to depression and depression is hard to hide ( especially when crying during work.)

Now, if I become close to a friend and decide to tell them I have BP they are always shocked. (That is because I hide in my house when I am depressed and don't let anyone know except my husband. ) My friends only see me when I have mild depression or have a stable mood or maybe a little hypomanic.

Amazing! I think there needs to be more stories like ours. I think people need to realize we can be very successful! Mine was just diagnosed in June and has progressively gotten worse and like you, I think I've had it for years but only my family saw the depression and manic episodes that would happen a few times a year. Hypo-mania definitely helped my career in Marketing. Like you, I don't know if I'll ever go back!

Hugs

[gina_re]

Originally Posted by Hashi/bipolar mom

Gina,

That is so awesome! Yeah, I actually think the hypo-mania really helped my career. It was really only my immediate family that saw the bad side of things and my medicating with alcohol.

I'm glad I'm not alone in this! There are definitely people that I've recently met after moving here that I would NEVER tell. They would be running for the hills. The moms around here are ruthless and gossipers. They wouldn't try to understand it.

I try not to disclose much. I just tell them the good stuff!

The people that I can tell that wouldn't be accepting or make ignorant comments in general, I would NEVER tell. Like at my last job, I'm sure some of them thought I was bp when I would be irritable, but I still kept my mouth shut. But who cares, I am so happy I left that place!!
Hypo definitely helped me out this summer, but getting through this depression is a struggle. I typically let my supervisors know (after being there a while and letting them see how awesome I actually am) just in case any issues arise that affects my work. Otherwise no one needs to know, but sometimes I feel the need to educate people that make dumb comments, but I may or may not reveal my diagnosis to shut them up. Having a psych degree helps me get away with it..
You are not alone! I'm pretty sure we all have our stories on how we've coped with everything, good and bad.

[Hashi/bipolar mom]

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

Not me never was....life's been a struggle...and still is.

I'm so sorry! Don't ever give up!

[Moogieotter]

I have stability, a good marriage, happy kids, a few close friends, and a fancy corporate job.

I'm on record w the HR Director and my manager as having Bipolar. Outside of this and my closest friends, I'd bet few suspect anything is up. I told a former colleague and now friend about it, and he was blown away in disbelief.

Nice thread. Thanks.

moogs

[faerie_moon_x]

I'd say I struggle with my full-time job, because I have difficulty focusing for long periods. But I have a friend who is also bipolar II and attending nursing school while working. I think she's much higher functioning than me when it comes to the office setting type of work.

Also, I'm working on my writing and nearly finished writing my book. It's easier than working at the office because I give myself permission to have many little breaks due to my focus problems.

[notthisagain]

Right now, it's strictly a need-to-know basis at my current employer. I've talked to friends and old co-workers about my BP and anxiety and they would have never guessed that about me. Some of my friends have even disclosed their issues with MI and you would never know from talking to them. I think that we all hide it well.

I think that a lot of people have this cartoonish vision of what it is really like to have MI. That's because of a lack of education and an irresponsible media that spins it to look like people with MI are either drugged-out zombies, knife-wielding maniacs, or mass shooters.

[gina_re]

Has anyone that has disclosed their disorder received a response of "I get depressed sometimes too"? I guess as a way to empathize, but after an explanation you realize that he/she wasn't actually depressed?
I hope that made sense...

[Curiosity77]

I work full time as a NP in a busy clinic, and I don't think most people have any idea. I told a few friends at work, but for the most part people don't know. It would be OK with me if they knew at this point, because I'm not ashamed, but it hasn't come up. I haven't had any serious episodes since starting this job 2 years ago. I would need to take time off if that happened. I'm very high functioning, and quite well most of the time. I've had some lost opportunities because of illness, and wasted a lot of time, but it could be a lot worse, so I'm lucky

[notthisagain]

Originally Posted by gina_re

Has anyone that has disclosed their disorder received a response of "I get depressed sometimes too"? I guess as a way to empathize, but after an explanation you realize that he/she wasn't actually depressed?
I hope that made sense...

Yes! My bf has come to the conclusion that he has depression or bipolar all on his own - no T, no pdoc, not even a family doctor. All he knows is that I have BP, GAD, and ADD. From what he says and from what I observe, he's just under a lot of stress at his job. If it's not just job stress, I wish he would see someone already about it.

[Wildflower4]

I maintained being successful in the military for 14 years, won leadership awards, got selected for special duties, ect. My personal life was usually a mess (until I met my husband). It seems like once I got out of the military was when I really had trouble in my work life. Hopefully someday I can change that.

[RomanJames2014]

I've always been mor successful when HYPOmanic. At work and school especially.
I had come out and told two employees who had kids that dealt with depression but it was a sworn secret between us three.
There is a stigma out there and they're were surprised because I've been very successful in my working life as well as my recent school life since I've leaned toward the manic side more.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[wiretwister]

work knows I had a "breakdown" when I went ip and off a month for op ... most think it was depression, I do not tell them any different ... really no one has asked .... my scheduler at work knows because when I have to take off at the last minute or need a day here or there she takes up for me with mgnt .... but she is only one that knows we have no local hr to tell ... I am a very successful service tech with a national company been there 28 years .... my episode 3 years ago was only time I have completely lost it ....

[BlackSheep79]

I would say so far, thankfully I've been successful. I have two college degrees, house, husband, and some friends (not a ton like years ago because I have distanced myself.) I'm not in my field yet, but working on it. I came out a couple of years ago at work. I wanted to change the stigma and help others and there family members. I think because of my mental illnesses I view the world differently, which I believe has helped me at work. I perceive things different, and don't sit back without giving my input on making improvements. I'm passionate and my bosses respect me for it. I've noticed on here and when comparing myself to the "norms" we're passionate. I've drifted, people at work didn't believe me that I suffered from BP, so yeah I'm hoping to change the stigma.

[Hashi/bipolar mom]

Originally Posted by Moogieotter

I have stability, a good marriage, happy kids, a few close friends, and a fancy corporate job.

I'm on record w the HR Director and my manager as having Bipolar. Outside of this and my closest friends, I'd bet few suspect anything is up. I told a former colleague and now friend about it, and he was blown away in disbelief.

Nice thread. Thanks.

moogs

Love that! I really wish this was talked about more in the general public. I do think there are many closeted BP people because they don't want the stigma and assumptions made about them. That is certainly my case with this new diagnosis. It was easier to say I was depressed or anxious, but when you mention BP, they just look at you like you are plain crazy! Drives me nuts!

[Hashi/bipolar mom]

Originally Posted by gina_re

Has anyone that has disclosed their disorder received a response of "I get depressed sometimes too"? I guess as a way to empathize, but after an explanation you realize that he/she wasn't actually depressed?
I hope that made sense...

Oh yeah, especially from my brother. He says, I get down too, that's just life. Deal with it. Uh huh! Others are like I'm always anxious and that makes me productive. Uh huh. Blah, Blah, Blah....

[Hashi/bipolar mom]

Originally Posted by RomanJames2014

I've always been mor successful when HYPOmanic. At work and school especially.
I had come out and told two employees who had kids that dealt with depression but it was a sworn secret between us three.
There is a stigma out there and they're were surprised because I've been very successful in my working life as well as my recent school life since I've leaned toward the manic side more.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

When I was diagnosed a few months ago, my close friends were shocked. They knew I had OCD, anxiety, severe depression, and alcoholism. I just didn't fit the profile that most news outlets, uneducated people have of being BP. Hell, I was surprised myself, but it all started to make sense. Hypo-mania definitely helped me with my career! The manic episodes have every 3-4 times a year were brutal and self destructive. However, only my two close friends, husband and son saw those episodes and consequences.

[BadWolfC]

The job I have right now is the first one where it hasn't effected my work, but I think that's because I hated every other job I've had and I actually enjoy this one. I mentioned that I have BP to my coworker a few days ago and she said she never would have guessed it. I think it depends on the situation because I never did very well until now, but I'm so good at this job that I was promoted recently, so I can see why my coworker wouldn't notice anything different about me.

[faerie_moon_x]

Originally Posted by gina_re

Has anyone that has disclosed their disorder received a response of "I get depressed sometimes too"? I guess as a way to empathize, but after an explanation you realize that he/she wasn't actually depressed?
I hope that made sense...

Oh yeah, I get this from people. It's frustrating. For me, depression isn't about feeling sad. It's that heavy apathy type of feeling.

I had one co-worker send me this stupid link about Abraham Lincoln being depressed and then tacked on the end this explanation about "deciding to be happy." I work very hard at maintaining stability and in the end I didn't even realize how horrible things were getting for me. People don't understand, that's the bottom line.

Also when I disclosed at work I was told (verbally of course) that I can never be "moved or promoted" with my condition. Yes, illegal but also my word against the HR director that it happened. Also, in a review, my old manager, who is a nurse, that I need to leave my bipolar at the door when I get to work in the morning.

The level of ignorance in this world is often astounding.

[BadWolfC]

Originally Posted by gina_re

Has anyone that has disclosed their disorder received a response of "I get depressed sometimes too"? I guess as a way to empathize, but after an explanation you realize that he/she wasn't actually depressed?
I hope that made sense...

I haven't really experienced this. I've had people say that I need to get over things and "it isn't that bad", but all those instances were before I was diagnosed. Once people realized that I have a diagnosable issue, those types of comments stopped.