Things are not going well in my marriage, and the finger is being pointed at me at the moment as being the cause of all our issues. How many who are married wish they had stayed single with their bipolar? Or have a partner who doesn't really want to deal with the bipolar and makes you feel alone with your condition?

Relationships take TWO people to make or break them. TWO people to work at them. No ONE person is to blame regardless of mental illness.

Couples therapy might be good but you both have to want it. Your other post gave me the feeling neither of you want it.

Idk how to help other than I am about to be married. My fiance supports me, helps me, loves me for me and listens when things are wonky in my head. Nothing is blamed on any of my mental illnesses.

I believe that's what it's supposed to be like.

I wish the best for you.

[99 FAIRIES]

I've been married for 15 years and my husband is my rock. But before my diagnosis we fought all the time. but since my bipolar diagnosis he (we) have educated ourselves and understand what we're dealing with. now we're a team and our marriage has never been stronger. best of luck to you.

[Alone & confused]

Originally Posted by Marsupilami

Things are not going well in my marriage, and the finger is being pointed at me at the moment as being the cause of all our issues. How many who are married wish they had stayed single with their bipolar? Or have a partner who doesn't really want to deal with the bipolar and makes you feel alone with your condition?

I have the opposite problem of this. My bf asked me to marry him last night and I'm confused as to why he would even want to! He usually catches the brunt of my anger during the really bad episodes of mania! I don't mean for that to happen of course, but still, WHY? WHY would he want to marry me? And IS it a good idea?
I'm curious as well as to how people answer your question. Maybe hearing others perspective will help me decide what I should do.

[tipper1492]

Here is the shocking side. If you search Google - Bipolar marriage divorce rate, you will find it to be 90%. Doesn't matter if one or both are Bipolar. Therefore the rate is very high. Before I was diagnosed at age 61, and placed on medications that worked, my wife had a very hard time with my verbal abuse, and at times I honestly thought I hated her. Those thoughts were due to my bipolar for the big part. My wife would have divorced me, I feel sure, but was probably waiting for out daughter to get through college. Wife & I have been married 25 years. Bipolar marriages also, in most cases, need outside help like with a psychologist. That person can decide if one or both of you need to come in, and when.

I want my marriage to work and will do anything for it. I agree it takes two to make it work, but it only takes one to give up and walk out.

I am fighting, but I cannot keep our marriage together if she has mentally moved on or grown tired of my bipolar. She is wanting time out, and is happier when I am not there, how do I combat that? I am trying to be the best person I can be for her..

[valerie1206]

I thought about having a family or getting marriage a lot but so scared if my future husband see the dark side of my personality, so I always choose to someone who is emotionally distant to love. I feel safe if the person I love doesn't really know who I am. But at the same time it is very painful.
Sometimes in front of my loved one I say things opposite to what I really think of. I feel angry at myself.