Living Incognito

CopperStar · Oct 26, 2015, 02:31 PM

After over a year of being unemployed, I have an interview tomorrow. I've never approached an interview this way, knowingly trying to hide what I really am and the true nature of my past.

I've left multiple past jobs off of my resume, because if they were to call for references, they would hear about how crazy I was. It actually looks better to just present myself as having been out of work for years than to include those experiences. Which means I also have to come up with lies explaining the employment gap, both the real gap and the made-up gap combined. I also have to hide the fact that I don't drive and don't have a vehicle. Luckily I have a valid driver's license, so I shouldn't be suspect from the get-go. Thankfully it's Autumn, so it's normal to wear long sleeves this time of year, which will hide my self-harm scarring. Then generally they want you to tell them a bit "about yourself" so I'll need to make up hobbies that I don't actually have. Then I have two family members posing as non-related friends for me, as my personal references, since I don't actually have any friends.

Altogether I have to present myself as normal, as a neuro-typical, with a normal life, and a normal past, without accidentally giving myself away or raising suspicion at any point. I'm not very good at lying or acting, and I think it's uncomfortable to try to be deceptive. I'm already nervous as all hell that somehow the recruiter is going to be able to "see through" me somehow, to sense that something is wrong with me.

Wish me luck ya'll, I'm going undercover into the normal world.

Oct 26, 2015, 02:45 PM

Good luck! He's only going to see what you tell him. What I've learned these past few years is to not get your hopes up on getting a job because everyone wants a job. I'm over qualified but I don't look anything like the little cutesy that doesn't know much. What can you do?

WibblyWobbly · Oct 26, 2015, 07:56 PM

Good luck! They won't have any reason to doubt you. Just put on your happy face and sell it!

Pierro · Oct 26, 2015, 08:05 PM

Good luck!

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CopperStar · Oct 27, 2015, 12:35 PM

At the end of the interview, the recruiter said they would be checking my employment/personal references over the next few days and doing a background check, and then giving me a call. So it sounds like I might actually get the job. Somehow I managed to come across as sane enough and successfully fudge my history. I had to keep lying over and over and felt so anxious and terrible, but I don't know how else you're supposed to compete for a job after you've had a history of mental health problems negatively affecting your ability to work, or even function at all. I can't imagine explaining in an interview, "Please don't call my past employers, because I had mental breakdowns and performed poorly due to psychosis," and still getting the job.

LettinG0 · Oct 27, 2015, 03:24 PM

Good luck, Copper!

And "undercover in the normal world" ---- hehehehhe --- love it....

WibblyWobbly · Oct 27, 2015, 03:49 PM

That's awesome! Congrats!

*Laurie* · Oct 27, 2015, 04:09 PM

I hope you get the job, Copper!

Oct 27, 2015, 06:17 PM

I don't know if this helps......
I work in the UK, in healthcare. I don't have bipolar but I do have MH issues and a history. I interviewed a guy who'd just left long term IP with bipolar and a whole load of other diagnoses. He was FANTASTIC. We offered him the job, he's been in post for over 2 years and is such a huge asset to the organisation. We embraced everything about him, which included his BPD. Yes, he has his bad times, but what he brings to the job and his warmth and personality outweighs that a million times. He's such a nice guy. If I could employ more people with BPD, I would. We are all clinical and understand (from our studies if not our personal experience) how hard it is. We admire and appreciate you, so please don't give up or worry or walk away. There is a place for you somewhere, doing something, and I'm sure you'll find it.

CopperStar · Oct 27, 2015, 06:29 PM

Thanks everyone. I got another call from the recruiter, and they gave me the job. I start my paperwork and training this week. The Zyprexa has me pretty numbed up, but somewhere at my core I can tell that I am deeply relieved and happy. It's only a part time job, minimum wage and an hour's walk from the house. Not too awesome, but it's something. It's a step back into normal life after this crazy, dreary year.