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#1
Feb 05, 2016, 12:27 PM
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I'm slowly getting back on track on the things I used to love. I have began drawing on the laptop again and on paper and I have gone back to studying. It's been years since I've lost interest in wanting to draw quality work, but now it's come back. It's been since 2013 when I lost interest in drawing. Sure I drew from time to time but I didn't get the exciting vibe that I had back in 2012. Now it's back again and it feels amazing. I'm back on studyin my NVQ level 3 health and social care. I have written at least 2 pages. Which is an achievement for me.
What hasn't been a achievement was getting out of bed at 12:30pm. Which really sucks for me although I did go to bed at 2am. My sleep has been shocking and the pattern I got myself into sucks. I go to bed late and I wake up late. Or either I go to bed late on a work night and get up early. I've been exercising for the past month or so. My love for cycling has come back as well as I was spending all my money on taxis. Money really sucks for me. I'm broke until I get paid at midnight. It's tempting to go out at midnight just to check my balance lol. Not sure if it's mania, hypomania or just normal? It sure feels great though.
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Bipolar affective disorder 2 Possible cptsd not yet dx Seroquel 300mg Lithium 600mg Propranolol 30mg |
 jacky8807
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 gina_re
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#2
Feb 05, 2016, 12:35 PM
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That's wonderful! I hope you continue to experience this fulfillment!
__________________
***** Every finger in the room is pointing at me I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now Tori Amos ~ Crucify Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder |
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#3
Feb 05, 2016, 12:46 PM
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Quote:
  life is starting to feel more meaningful.
__________________
Bipolar affective disorder 2 Possible cptsd not yet dx Seroquel 300mg Lithium 600mg Propranolol 30mg |
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#4
Feb 05, 2016, 01:59 PM
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I am so glad for you!
 I know what art can do. I had my creative juices kickstart after having been dormant for years. I am working on a large mixed media tree of life presently. I am seriously considering taking a beginning sewing class after completion of my tree. I only have so many walls. 
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#5
Feb 05, 2016, 03:00 PM
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So cool you're getting back into your creative outlets.
 I should get into art. They offer a pretty cool art class where I go for therapy. I've usually expressed myself through music mainly. But they have painting, sculpture, all kinds of cool stuff. I really do need to sign up for it... |
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#6
Feb 05, 2016, 03:14 PM
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Quote:
i usually use plan pencil, drawing pen and paper or i use a art program called paint tool sai and it's really good. i used to do sewing in college.
__________________
Bipolar affective disorder 2 Possible cptsd not yet dx Seroquel 300mg Lithium 600mg Propranolol 30mg |
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#7
Feb 05, 2016, 03:16 PM
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Quote:
. keeps the motivation going.
__________________
Bipolar affective disorder 2 Possible cptsd not yet dx Seroquel 300mg Lithium 600mg Propranolol 30mg |
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#8
Feb 05, 2016, 03:20 PM
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I find it relaxing to think about a project when I get stressed at school or work. It makes me feel in control again.
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#9
Feb 05, 2016, 03:32 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Bipolar affective disorder 2 Possible cptsd not yet dx Seroquel 300mg Lithium 600mg Propranolol 30mg |
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#10
Feb 05, 2016, 03:45 PM
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I used to paint watercolor and Japanese art.
I've got some wonderful new supplies. For me right now-no motivation or desire. Have a studio just sitting there.
__________________
 Bipolar 1Day Vraylar 3 mg. Wellbutrin 150 Night meds Temazepam 30 mg or lorazepam Hasn't helped yet. From sunny California! |
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#11
Feb 05, 2016, 04:02 PM
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Quote:
.
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Bipolar affective disorder 2 Possible cptsd not yet dx Seroquel 300mg Lithium 600mg Propranolol 30mg |
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#12
Feb 05, 2016, 05:53 PM
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That's great roses!!!!! I think that is one of the best feelings in the world!!!! Like you want to create again
So happy for you!
__________________
I used to rule the world Seas would rise when I gave the word Now in the morning, I sleep alone Sweep the streets I used to own I used to roll the dice Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes Listen as the crowd would sing Now the old king is dead! Long live the king! One minute I held the key Next the walls were closed on me And I discovered that my castles stand Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand |
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#13
Feb 05, 2016, 06:32 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Bipolar affective disorder 2 Possible cptsd not yet dx Seroquel 300mg Lithium 600mg Propranolol 30mg |
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#14
Feb 07, 2016, 08:39 PM
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Well. I thought I was getting back on track until I phsycially pulled out my own hair at work because I panicked about everything...
__________________
Bipolar affective disorder 2 Possible cptsd not yet dx Seroquel 300mg Lithium 600mg Propranolol 30mg |
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#15
Feb 07, 2016, 09:34 PM
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Just a minor setback. Don't let it throw your whole process off.
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Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
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#16
Feb 08, 2016, 08:24 AM
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Quote:
__________________
Bipolar affective disorder 2 Possible cptsd not yet dx Seroquel 300mg Lithium 600mg Propranolol 30mg |
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#17
Feb 08, 2016, 10:02 AM
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I am very sorry to hear this news. I don't know what to say except that these feelings won't last forever. You had good, stable days. They aren't over. They will come back.
I am a skin scratcher and picker, usually my face. It seems every time I think I have beaten it, I get upset or panicked and not even thinking I am doing it again. Then I get even more upset because I am disfiguring myself, and I feel like I failed . It is a vicious cycle. I wish I knew the key to breaking it for good so I could share it with you. These are the tough days of bipolar. Be kind and gentle with yourself. You are doing the best that you can against panic right now. Take heart because better days will return. |
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#18
Feb 08, 2016, 01:45 PM
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Quote:
 its rather annoying what i keep doing but i can't help it. its like it's at the back of my mind and my mind wont shut up
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Bipolar affective disorder 2 Possible cptsd not yet dx Seroquel 300mg Lithium 600mg Propranolol 30mg |
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