[ItsHardBeingCrazy]

Yes I know this is a common thing said, but I am really struggling to understand everything that went on in my last relationship.

This is a very long description of events as it covers our three break ups with in the last year.

I am 28 he is 29.
We met a year ago and things moved really fast, with in the first few dates he was asking me to be his girlfriend which i found odd but romantic. He was impulsive and passionate and traditional. He would pamper me with roses and back rubs and little gifts. he wanted to spend lots of time with me, and as needy as he was I enjoyed it. Then after dating steady for about 3 months he dumps me over text message. he writes "I'm a horrible person I don't deserve you I wish you the best take care" It had only been 3 months so i just brushed it off as another guy afraid of commitment , until 2 weeks later when he wouldn't stop calling me or texting. I would wake up and find 78 text messages on my phone saying "hi" "I miss you" "I love you" "I'm sorry"...... eventually I caved and talked to him about the way he ended things. His excuse was he was going through a bad time. he had lost his job, he was ashamed broke and taken by the stress of it all. We talked and both opened up to each other on many different levels. He quickly began to call me his girlfriend again, even though it took me another month or so to really consider him my boyfriend.

The first time we had sex after the break up he cried he kept kissing my forehead telling me how much he loved me and how much he missed me..... Again i though it odd, but romantic and just assumed it to be his passionate sensitivity. He was excited and talkative and goofy for weeks. He wanted to see me every day he called everyday several times a day, and texted all day long and then it just began to fade. He would get quite, sad, and disinterested. He would begin working out more, keeping in contact less, he was always tired, but he still insisted I spend weekends at his home. Shortly following the sadness would be anger.

He would become angry with me for no reason and pick arguments with me that made no sense. He argued with me about no spending enough time with him, then about calling or texting him back in what was his definition a reasonable amount of time, and lastly about eating cake on valentines day because i was not to eat sugar as i had made a new years resolution to stay away from sugar due to my family history of diabetes. I asked him what his problem was and he told me that my allergies were annoying him to him, I assumed this was his way of pushing me away so I thought I would make things easy for him and removed my self from the equation.

I broke things off with him and just 4 days pass before he is frantically calling me. He can't Eat, he cant sleep, he misses me, his other half is missing, he is lost with out me, and so in love with me. I go to his place to pick up my things We have a huge argument I'm yelling he is crying, grabbing me holding me. I cried the entire way home. I missed him. At this point he wasn't just some guy I was dating he was my partner and i had fallen very much in love with him.

After a few weeks of not talking to him I agree to meet with him alone in a public setting. We had a lovely dinner. He tells me how much he really does love me and again is quick to call me his girlfriend, this time even suggesting that we move in together (which i quickly had to decline). he begins to shower me with gifts and attention. this is when i began to notice a pattern in his sexual desire that had always been there but i had never payed attention to sometimes he is insatiable, 3,4,5 times a day other times he can not even get an erection.

For the next month we are together all the time joined at the hip and he is the happiest I have ever seen him..... then the sadness settled in he said he wanted to see me and so i went to his place when i got there he was layed out on his bed almost in tears he claimed to be tired he did not want to kiss me, he would barley look at me and he did not want to have sex. he went straight to bed me lying down next to him. over the next week he contacted me less, again, he began taking more time to himself, he said he was in a dark place.He said he wanted to be left alone. He did not want to go out, just lay around at home, he said he was in a dark place that he hated his situation. how his job sucks he feels stuck, and how he hates were he lives.

I tried being supportive of him and his feelings and gave him the space he requested but by the weekend i got a text message that read "I hate where I am right now and feel like i have to focus on getting out of this hole, I don't want to drag you down with me... goodbye" I demanded we talk and he not do this again. he agreed to talk after much prodding. when we talked I assured him I was not going anywhere that i loved him and we could make it through the bad times together. He had nothing to say except "I'm sorry, but I really don't feel like I should be with anyone right now" and so i let him go. I later blocked him on all social media, and deleted him phone number from my phone which i now regret. I do still love him very much, and I worry that he may have an actual depressive disorder. I do not want to get back together with him as I do not have the ability to help him but i do wonder if he is alright. So my question is Does this sound like bipolar depression to you, and if so should i refer him to a professional or cut my losses now?

[Ripose]

I think he definitely needs to see a pdoc and you should keep your distance from him until he does. Perhaps then you can sit down and have discussion about what the pdoc said and what his Dx is.

The longer you let things continue as they are the more you become to hate him and it really sounds like you don't want that to happen. I am glad you are willing to give hime another chance but only if he agrees to see a pdoc.

[pirilin]

Well, I think he may be. But I could be wrong, I'm not a doctor.

[ComfortablyNumb5]

It very well could be.. Or he could be one manipulative emotional abuser. He showers you with gifts to get you and then pushes you away. Hate to say it, but some people just do that sort of thing to stir up attention and get a reaction out of you.

I agree that you shouldn't see him until he sees a pdoc. It very well could be a MI too. Maybe a MI that causes him to be this way with intimate relationships. Hell, it could be a lot of things. I would just give him his space for now and if he tries to come back once again then let him know he should see a dr first. No matter what's wrong with him, you don't deserve to be played with like that.

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I say he's bipolar on the down low. Take him down with a tranquilizer dart loaded with dark-net Demerol and have him committed to an inpatient facility in a state like Utah where orderlies can hit the patients.