[Melmo]

I know I already made a work related post not too long ago, sorry for another one but I am a bit worried about having to go back to work in May. It's only a little over 5 weeks away and the way I feel now, I won't be able to make it through one day from lack of energy but not only that with my anger and irritability I am at risk of telling someone where to go! (probably my boss :/ ) Not sure what to do.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Have you ever tried vocational rehab? They help you come up with any adaptations that can help you work, provide education, testing for what work might work best for you, etc. It's called slightly different things in different states but you should be able to find it with a search. I did it a while ago and it helped some. They ultimately recommended I go on SSDI which I did not agree with and I continued to work for another 6 years but they did give me some useful help.

I hope that you can get better in the 5 weeks. Do you have the option to extend your leave if needed?

[Melmo]

I'm in Canada, so never heard of that.
I'm not on sick leave, I am on maternity leave and it ends in May. It can't be extended. This depressive episode just happened to really hit me at the beginning of this month. I will be starting Effexor tomorrow so hoping it'll help. Everyone and everything pisses me off and I know I won't be able to put up with my boss's ****** attitude.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Effexor always worked fast for me. I took it before I was diagnosed and so I would always have the dose work for a week and then it wouldn't and I had to increase again until I maxed out. But it did work for me, I just couldn't get the dose right. I have a friend who takes a higher dose of zyrpexa so that she can take a higher dose of Effexor and then she does well.

I hope it works for you. I'm sorry that you have the set in stone deadline. I had that once but I went back and everyone could see it wasn't time. I worked for AMAZING people then who kept me on leave until it was clear I wasn't going to work again.

Is this a post-partum thing or bipolar or too hard to tell? I know we are at higher risk for post-partum depression and/or anxiety.

[Melmo]

I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety about 4 1/2 years ago, I really think I have bipolar disorder, the symptoms fit. I brought it up to my family dr today and he didn't seem like he was surprised, almost like he thought so all along. He referred me to a psychiatrist so hoping I can find out exactly what's wrong with me. Because this definitely doesn't feel like normal depression. I think post partum could possibly be making it worse but it started while I was pregnant, after I went off my meds. It has slowly been getting worse.

In the past, I was extremely lucky and somehow I was able to get through work without too much issue. I had periods where my productivity was next to nothing due to depression. On the other hand, I had periods of very high productivity from hypomania. Sometimes my concentration was off and I made errors. At my last job (which I held for many years) I know my behavior was probably a bit bizarre. However I was going through some pretty terrible and unexpected things and I kinda feel people knew about these very serious things and cut me some slack. I was lucky. Overall, I was a good employee and I feel they got there money's worth. That said, had they wanted to fire me, they probably could have (this applies to the various jobs I've held)

I became physically ill several years ago and cannot currently work. My bipolar has gotten much worse (especially the depression) since becoming ill. My physical illness has a synergetic relationship with my bipolar.

If I'm able to go to work in the future, I'd definitely read up on my rights via the ADA and anything else which may be required. Your in Canada, so I'm not sure if you have anything like that? The ADA is the Americans with disabilities act. It offers some job protection to hopefully prevent being discriminated against in the work place.

Just a question, why do you feel you will butt heads with your boss? Is it because of your prior experience with this person being disrespectful? Of is it solely your mood? If it's because of the way they treat you, I sure hope you have some way to prevent that. It's not ok for people in power to mistreat you. That's abusive. If it's your mood, I get ya completely. I wish I had a solution, but the only thing that comes to mind is a strong PRN and try to stay away from people.

[gina_re]

Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow

Have you ever tried vocational rehab? They help you come up with any adaptations that can help you work, provide education, testing for what work might work best for you, etc. It's called slightly different things in different states but you should be able to find it with a search. I did it a while ago and it helped some. They ultimately recommended I go on SSDI which I did not agree with and I continued to work for another 6 years but they did give me some useful help.

I hope that you can get better in the 5 weeks. Do you have the option to extend your leave if needed?

My sisters fiance did this. He has ADHD and it helped him find something compatible. I hope they have something similar in Canada. Good luck with your pdoc appointment!

[Melmo]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

In the past, I was extremely lucky and somehow I was able to get through work without too much issue. I had periods where my productivity was next to nothing due to depression. On the other hand, I had periods of very high productivity from hypomania. Sometimes my concentration was off and I made errors. At my last job (which I held for many years) I know my behavior was probably a bit bizarre. However I was going through some pretty terrible and unexpected things and I kinda feel people knew about these very serious things and cut me some slack. I was lucky. Overall, I was a good employee and I feel they got there money's worth. That said, had they wanted to fire me, they probably could have (this applies to the various jobs I've held)

I became physically ill several years ago and cannot currently work. My bipolar has gotten much worse (especially the depression) since becoming ill. My physical illness has a synergetic relationship with my bipolar.

If I'm able to go to work in the future, I'd definitely read up on my rights via the ADA and anything else which may be required. Your in Canada, so I'm not sure if you have anything like that? The ADA is the Americans with disabilities act. It offers some job protection to hopefully prevent being discriminated against in the work place.

Just a question, why do you feel you will butt heads with your boss? Is it because of your prior experience with this person being disrespectful? Of is it solely your mood? If it's because of the way they treat you, I sure hope you have some way to prevent that. It's not ok for people in power to mistreat you. That's abusive. If it's your mood, I get ya completely. I wish I had a solution, but the only thing that comes to mind is a strong PRN and try to stay away from people.

She's just not a nice person. She talks about other employees behind their backs to other employees, makes fun of customers, gets *****y with me when I have a daycare issue for my kids (like when we had a huge snow storm and the daycare called me because their power went out and I had to pick up my daughter) apparently I should have had someone else go pick her up.

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[Melmo]

Originally Posted by gina_re

My sisters fiance did this. He has ADHD and it helped him find something compatible. I hope they have something similar in Canada. Good luck with your pdoc appointment!

Thanks hoping its soon.

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[ComfortablyNumb5]

Lol I'm convinced that the only place I can work is where I have no boss and don't have to make human interaction. I lost two jobs because of my BP and right now im trying to get SSD. And yes my anger got the best of me at work. When they let me go I walked out, both middle fingers in the air. Guess I won't be getting a letter of recommendation from them?! But what DID help me in the beginning was increasing my mood stabilizer. I still had mood swings from stress alone but nothing I couldn't hide. I think you should try to put back work until you finally get into a pdoc and get stable. And it may take trial and error so be prepared. If you ever have any med concerns feel free to PM me on here and I'll help you with what I can from experience. Trust me I've been to hell and back with psych meds lol

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[Crazy Hitch]

I didn't work for 18 months due to some wild uncontrollable episodes ...

Fortunately I've been working since January this year ... so far so good!

[elevatedsoul]

I'm dangerously not able to work... trying to get ssdi so I can get treatment... good luck..

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Wow, I'm not able to work,not really, tried tons of times. Truth is when I'm happy working and I'm a superstar, high achievemer, only to unintentionally make highers ups look incompetent by comparison, (People tell me the bosses feel threatened) so I've always been let go, never legally and never ethically, but that's how it goes. Before I used to put it down to me being a loser until I really started listening to what other people told me what was really going on. Yep, blocked from employment because of high capacity/ability. In one case my immediate supervisor was so upset I was being fired, he wrote an amazing reference letter putting his own job on the line, and another my fellow staff members were so upset and although warned not to do so held a huge go away party for me in the staff room, with cake and presents. Now tell me that doesn't screw up a CPTSD and BiPolar guy? Horrible, just horrible.

[Jan1755]

I'm on disability since 2010. In the past I never kept a job longer than a year and a half. StRted on short term disability and then long term disability and finally social security disability. My psychiatrist was the one who noticed I could never stay in a job longer than a year and a half.

[Brentsoccer43]

I am at work but I work alone so at times, it's boring and what's worse is my mind starts to drift about life and then I feel myself getting down about things

I'm so sorry to hear about your boss! That sounds terrible and it's understandable for you to be cringing at the thought of having to deal with her. Is there any way for you to find another job in the future? I hope you find a way to get stable quickly, so you'll have the patience to deal with that.

[Melmo]

I am looking at other options, just not sure where. Plus, I have social anxiety and starting new jobs is stressful because I don't know anyone or know what I'm doing.

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I understand completely regarding the social anxiety. I have that as well.

Starting a new job is stressful for many, but with social anxiety, it can be an agonizing ordeal of epic proportions. I used to have some workbooks for social anxiety and I found them very helpful. This was over 20 years ago, but I bet they have something even better now. The book offered coping strategies by teaching you to reframe your thoughts. I think it was based around what is now called "DBT" or something similar. It's not a cure in most cases, but it's a pretty safe thing to try.

I have a hard time working, but I'm trying to push through it.

Right now I'm in the middle of my first "angry" hypomanic episode (maybe dysphoria or a mixed state?). I just feel irritable all the time and I know I'm acting recklessly, but I can't help it. But I guess one positive thing is, I'm getting a lot of work done, both at work and at home (I'm cleaning a lot).

I'm trying to refrain from going on disability. I just graduated from university in May 2015, and I'm already on my 2nd professional job.

[MusicLover82]

I work about 25 hours a week, in a professional position with bosses who are very laid-back and easy to work for. I've been working there for over 4 and a half years now. I think when you have mental illness, your job should be lower stress than the average person's job, and you need a psychiatrist who can properly manage the illness. I know it's challenging finding the right position that can meet your needs, but I'll bet you can find a way to work if you want to/ need to. Best wishes!

Btw, I have Bipolar 2/ OCD and I take Lithium, Trileptal, Latuda, Risperdal, and Xanax. I stay pretty stable and I love my psychiatrist!

[otherg]

Originally Posted by Melmo

I know I already made a work related post not too long ago, sorry for another one but I am a bit worried about having to go back to work in May. It's only a little over 5 weeks away and the way I feel now, I won't be able to make it through one day from lack of energy but not only that with my anger and irritability I am at risk of telling someone where to go! (probably my boss :/ ) Not sure what to do.

I haven't worked full time since 2001. I've worked part time on and off since then. Many jobs became too stressful even though they were part time. I work best by myself on my terms. Not working at the present--major depressive episode. Hoping to get out of it soon without a manic return.

[BipolaRNurse]

I went on SSDI last year. I haven't worked in almost 2 years and don't see a situation in which I could work, as a nurse or otherwise. I've got both mental and physical disabilities. Just the idea of going to a job and having people expect things of me makes me break into a cold sweat. Plus, I'm 57 and the job market for older people blows. I do make a few bucks from my writing once in awhile, but I'll probably never make a living from it. My SSDI isn't very much but I'm able to make do on it, and have a little left over at the end of the month.

[Miss Laura]

Hypothetically I can't work as medically I'm too unwell. But I have been actively looking for 3 years now and have had a few interviews but to no avail. It knocks your confidence for sure

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I went through the voc. rehab. program. Great program! However, I was just too sick and in a not so subtle way was steered towards ssdi. Now, not quite a year into it, at least I'm surviving financially, but it's still stressful, just not as stressful. Without working, I'm coping slightly better financially. Am I still sick? Yes. Do I want to return to work? Absolutely. If I did, what would happen? 100% guarantee I would forget all about my health again to solely focus on doing an outstanding job to compensate for my behavior. Or at least that's how my brain is hard wired. If I do excellent work, then my behavior won't be an issue, even though it has many times and sent me packing several times not by choice.

So, for my near future, it looks as though just making through each day is about as good as it gets.

I do hope that it works out for the best, and that it just doesn't work out, which is how I feel it has for me.

nope, i can't work.

which is actually ashame.. in the past i always thought i was going to end up a vet or computer technitian.

funny how life changes and MI just gets in the way