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  #1  
Old Apr 07, 2016, 08:42 PM
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raspberrytorte raspberrytorte is offline
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...feel like life is kicking your ***?!

I feel like I'm taking a beating right now!

Between hospitalizations, unfortunate medication withdrawal, a lousy psychiatrist, being court ordered and having the ****ing police show up at my door, computers crashing, laptops crashing resulting in writing projects being gone/novel revisions disappearing/synopsis rewrites I slaved over receiving the same fate, novel rejections, just receiving one where my novel made it through a second reread and readers were impressed by it/liked it BUT THEY STILL SENT ME A REJECTION, not being able to afford to buy a new laptop so I can't really do anything as far as marketing goes right now, pushing twenty thousand dollars in medical debt...

Blah blah blah. Certain I'm missing some.

It would be nice if I could catch a break.

I'm tired of being a punching bag.

Thinking about these series of misfortunes is making me want to geek out!

And no I'm not depressed. I'm ****ing pissed!
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The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
Hugs from:
bipolar angel, BipolaRNurse, gina_re, Icare dixit, MusicLover82, Nammu, Pikku Myy, pirilin, Wander

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  #2  
Old Apr 07, 2016, 08:46 PM
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raspberrytorte raspberrytorte is offline
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Oh, and I'm dealing with my boss being a ****ing asshole right now.
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The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
  #3  
Old Apr 07, 2016, 08:47 PM
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pirilin pirilin is offline
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And you have a right to be. Hi Rasps. I revived your post about the Lamictal. But I think it's not a good moment to talk about that. It's good to let it all out. I cacht up with you tomorrow. "The olds" (me) got to bed early. (((HUGS))).
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Thanks for this!
raspberrytorte
  #4  
Old Apr 07, 2016, 08:48 PM
hahayeahtotallylol hahayeahtotallylol is offline
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How long did it take to write the book?
Thanks for this!
raspberrytorte
  #5  
Old Apr 07, 2016, 08:52 PM
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raspberrytorte raspberrytorte is offline
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For me it takes between two and four months to write a novel. It takes me much longer to figure everything out for one though. The one that just got the rejection took two and a half I think. It was an awesome two and a half months. I felt fantastic.
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The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
Hugs from:
bipolar angel
Thanks for this!
hahayeahtotallylol
  #6  
Old Apr 07, 2016, 09:44 PM
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Pikku Myy Pikku Myy is offline
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I could honestly agree. Thank god i am still somewhat balanced.
  #7  
Old Apr 07, 2016, 10:12 PM
MusicLover82 MusicLover82 is offline
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When it rains, it pours. I hope things get better for you ASAP. I just went through a year of h*** (2015). I hope this year will continue to get better for me, too. HUGS!!!!!
Thanks for this!
raspberrytorte
  #8  
Old Apr 07, 2016, 10:28 PM
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Wander Wander is offline
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Certainly had that feeling before. So sorry to hear about the struggles you are going through. Hang in there it has to turn around soon...well I certainly hope it does!
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Bipolar 1 with psychotic features
PTSD




"Phew! For a minute there I lost myself."

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Thanks for this!
raspberrytorte
  #9  
Old Apr 07, 2016, 10:33 PM
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st0psign st0psign is offline
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Location: Pittsburgh
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I recently had the ****ing police show up on my doorstep too. they carted me down the psych ward for an eval...
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Meds
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Lamictal 200mg
Haldol 5mg (+5mg during mixed episodes)
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  #10  
Old Apr 07, 2016, 10:57 PM
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raspberrytorte raspberrytorte is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by st0psign View Post
I recently had the ****ing police show up on my doorstep too. they carted me down the psych ward for an eval...
I was worried they were there to take me to the psych ward!

Sorry that happened to you. Sucks. Were you admitted after the evaluation, or did they let you go home?
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
  #11  
Old Apr 07, 2016, 11:37 PM
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lilypup lilypup is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2014
Location: out west
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I love novel writing while manic!
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Lamictal
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Xanax .25 as needed
  #12  
Old Apr 08, 2016, 09:24 AM
manicdiamond manicdiamond is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2016
Location: IL
Posts: 28
I'm sorry to hear all of the overwhelming things that are going on right now in your life. I feel this way too sometimes. I guess it makes us stronger when we survive it all.
Thanks for this!
raspberrytorte
  #13  
Old Apr 08, 2016, 09:40 AM
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raspberrytorte raspberrytorte is offline
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What kind of stuff do you write, lily?
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
  #14  
Old Apr 08, 2016, 09:44 AM
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raspberrytorte raspberrytorte is offline
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Thanks, manicdiamond! I'll be alright. Just had a raving moment triggered by that rejection. And then I had a total geeking out moment about it all. Lol. Sometimes all you can do is laugh.
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous

The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token

"What if I can't get up and stand tall,
What if the diamond days are all gone, and
Who will I be when the Empire falls?
Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token
Hugs from:
Nammu
  #15  
Old Apr 08, 2016, 08:09 PM
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cashart10 cashart10 is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2013
Location: KY
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I'm sorry you are struggling.

I have had different life experiences from you but I get it being sucky. I have been increasingly depressed and can find no relief. And, I can hardly pay our bills. I've rarely ever been behind but now that seems to be the norm.

Anyway, I hate seeing you struggle my friend. All my love.
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*****

Every finger in the room is pointing at me
I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring
I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth
Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now

Tori Amos ~ Crucify

Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder
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raspberrytorte
Thanks for this!
raspberrytorte
  #16  
Old Apr 09, 2016, 07:00 AM
BastetsMuse BastetsMuse is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2015
Location: Carson City
Posts: 823
[quote=raspberrytorte;5000552
And no I'm not depressed. I'm ****ing pissed![/quote]

I'm impressed that you wrote a book. Way to go, you.

I think it's a good sign that your angry. Angry people usually get stuff done.
Thanks for this!
raspberrytorte
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