[zepchic]

So, I went off my meds and had a fairly serious depressive episode, followed by a short-lived hypomanic episode.

During that hypomanic episode, I decided I should apply for a job. So I did and went on an interview which went really well. She all but offered me the position on the spot.

The problem is I really don't know if I am capable of holding a regular job. And I have my own business that I would have to give up. My business is fledgling and I didn't really make any money this year, but I should stand to make some next year, plus I love it. This job would lift our family out of poverty and make me self-sufficient if I end up getting a divorce. My business probably won't ever be enough to make me self-sufficient or lift us out of poverty.

This job was a decision made out of a hypomanic episode, but that doesn't mean it is a bad idea. I see my therapist on Monday, so at least we can discuss there, but I don't necessarily want her opinion to dictate my decision. KWIM

I don't have anyone I can really talk to about this, so I am posting here. What should i do?

[Victoria'smom]

Can you put your business on hold to try this new job?

[Ocean Swimmer]

Try the new job. Maybe get a partner for your business.
Have you received a formal offer yet?

[gayleggg]

Yes, if you could put your business on hold long enough to give this new one a try and give yourself a chance to see if you will like it. Talk it over with your therapist. Make a pros and cons list.

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[ComfortablyNumb5]

It sounds like this new job can be of great help to you. And if it doesn't work out, you always have your business to go back to. Worse case scenario, you get fired but you got a paycheck coming. I myself had to apply for SSD a few weeks ago but I cashed my last paycheck which helped out greatly. Yea, it's the last one I get to cash but it's better than nothing right now.

PS: think about going back on meds to help stabilize you if you aren't back on them already. I had to increase my stabilizer before my first day of work and it did help.

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[zepchic]

I did go back on my meds. The business isn't something I can put on hold really. It took me this year to build up my clients and it is a smallish town, so once I close up, I probably wouldn't go back to it because then I look flaky to the clients. It's a teaching job, so starts in the fall, but there is a training I would attend in July. My business also follows the school year.

I just feel so incapable sometimes and my husband doesn't help with that.

Thanks for responding.

[ComfortablyNumb5]

Originally Posted by zepchic

I did go back on my meds. The business isn't something I can put on hold really. It took me this year to build up my clients and it is a smallish town, so once I close up, I probably wouldn't go back to it because then I look flaky to the clients. It's a teaching job, so starts in the fall, but there is a training I would attend in July. My business also follows the school year.

I just feel so incapable sometimes and my husband doesn't help with that.

Thanks for responding.

It might be too much stress and I wouldn't recommend it, but can you keep up both or get a partner to help? A business is something you put a lot of work and care into and that would be a shame to lose it unless of course, you're not making anything off it. And the job doesn't start until July so take this time to prepare. I couldn't bring myself to work until my stabilizer was doing its job. And unfortunately when my stabilizer started to fail, so did my health and the job went under. I wish I had more of a hold on the right meds at the time. But if I was given time to prepare myself mentally, I'm sure I'd still be working. It was a spur of the moment thing like yours as well.

[zepchic]

Part of my dilemma is I am kind of a hippie following my dream making my business, led by spirit over ego...blah blah blah

But then Ego presents this job and it's like, 'Take this job and all your troubles will be gone'

[wiretwister]

Originally Posted by zepchic

Part of my dilemma is I am kind of a hippie following my dream making my business, led by spirit over ego...blah blah blah

But then Ego presents this job and it's like, 'Take this job and all your troubles will be gone'

I am the poster child for NOT following my dreams ... I got a job at 16 (when I could drive) and have never not been working for someone else ... I am tempted to say go for your dream ,,, but I never did so my opinion really has no merit ..... good luck whatever you choose ....

[Victoria'smom]

your a home school mom if I remember right?

[cincidak]

If you are back on your meds and stable I say go for the new job. There's a lot to be said for financial independence. The business you have sounds dead end, maybe if you lived somewhere like a city where you could have more customers /clients, but you said you live in a small town. The new job makes more sense financially.

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[zepchic]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

your a home school mom if I remember right?

yes, three boys

[zepchic]

Originally Posted by cincidak

If you are back on your meds and stable I say go for the new job. There's a lot to be said for financial independence. The business you have sounds dead end, maybe if you lived somewhere like a city where you could have more customers /clients, but you said you live in a small town. The new job makes more sense financially.

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I think I can, I think I can....LOL, maybe...if I do my business, I will never be status quo...always on the fringe, making ends meet, doing things my own way

[zepchic]

I am so wishy-washy. Literally, hour by hour i change my mind. agghhhhh!

[Victoria'smom]

Will this effect home schooling? How likely is it your marriage will fail? Can you look into teaching at co-ops for extra money?

[zepchic]

My husband would take over homeschooling or some or all of the kids could go to the school I would work at. I ask myself everyday how likely it is my marriage will fail. IDK. It is me that is being the failure there. My business is pretty much like a teaching co-op. I teach classes for homeschoolers.

I think I am going to take a breather and just let my thoughts go back and forth till Monday when I see T and then make a decision maybe Tuesday.

[Victoria'smom]

If it were me I'd keep my business as stash part or all of the money just in case of something or your marriage fails. You can have up to $2000 in savings and still get assistance. That will at least give you enough for a place and turn on utilities and give you a month to find a job that can support you.

[zepchic]

Thanks, my hubby can't take our house. My mom owns it and we rent from her luckily. He could technically take all the cars though.