[hopeless2015]

So I had to go to court today and I'm back home feeling like I could cry and throw up at the same time. I should go to work but don't feel like I can face the world right now. It seems I have no coping skills at all. I've been so back and forth lately. Part of me feels like I should go for disability and part of me feels like I've got this. My check this week will only be half cause I missed so much time last pay period, I was starting to feel like I was doing better till I went to time sheet and saw how much time I missed. I've been kidding myself, this depression has a bigger hold on me than I want to admit. I don't think the meds are working. Therapy doesn't seem to be sticking with me. Every morning I wake up and think I can't do this, if I don't get up, shower and go to work I'm disappointing my family but I still can't bring myself to go most days. Maybe I'm just feeling sorry for myself...I don't know...why can't I just cope with life like everyone else does

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[gina_re]

First of all, not everyone has coping skills that help every single time. It happens, so don't beat yourself up over it. You're human, and we all have those days, weeks, months, or even years. Heck, I'm anxious about coming into work tomorrow because of the baby shower we have planned, and I'm the one that helped to plan it! We planned it all through email. Cry it out and have your day, and hopefully you will be calm enough to go in tomorrow.
I've also had similar thoughts of just giving in and going on disability, selling my house, and everything. But then I have to force it because, I seriously have no where else to really go. I'm the most stable one in my immediate family (), especially as housing is concerned. Maybe an aunt or uncle can take me, but that could stress me out even more. So I keep pushing through and bug the hell out of my pdoc and continue with the therapy. Hugs and hope you find relief soon. Hang in there!

[lilypup]

Yes, as Gina said, many of us aren't coping either. Hugs to you and hang in there.

[hopeless2015]

Thanks you guys, I'll try to get myself together. Hugs back at ya

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[gina_re]

Originally Posted by hopeless2015

Thanks you guys, I'll try to get myself together. Hugs back at ya

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We're here for you! I hope you feel better!

[Nammu]

It took years of therapy with some excellent therapists to learn how to recognize my moods in an early enough state to use the coping methods. All you can do is keep plugging away and it will get easier to cope. It does help to reduce stress, working or being on SSDI is different for each of us. Lack of sleep and outside pressure ( like Gina mentioned the shower--good stress but still stress) are to two biggest stresses for me so I try to control those two things and then it's much easier to use the coping skills.

[hopeless2015]

Thanks...tomorrow's a new day, I'll get up and try again tomorrow

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i know i should be using coping skills, but sometimes i get so bad i forget to use them (actually even when i'm feeling average i forget to use them)

oh... scrap it

i just forget to use them. i know, i'm bad

[hopeless2015]

Home again, I'm going to try and make it in to work sometime today though. Right now not feeling like I can face anyone. The thought of leaving home makes me want to vomit

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[GoldenSnitch]

Try not to be too hard on yourself - what you are going through is awful!

I've only very recently started to get some coping skills for certain situations and I've seen multiple therapists over many years. It's hard not to give up but keep trying!

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