Maybe I should be posting this in the BPD forum, but I know some of you have insight on BPD vs BP so I thought I'd try here first...sorry for the length...

So I met this woman a few months ago and within a few days of talking to each other she told me (very casually) that she has borderline. I was a little surprised because when I met her I honestly thought she might be manic - she was extremely "friendly" and talkative and hyper, really in your face. I've been sort of avoiding her lately not because she told me she has BPD but she just isn't my kind of weird...sometimes I feel like she really enjoys making people uncomfortable. She'll also text me randomly things like "I just want to hang out in pajamas together...like love" (keep in mind I barely know her and we have never even hung out alone). She also told me she is extremely depressed all the time, barely eats, barely gets out of bed and when I brought up how "high" she was the night we met (secretly hoping she would reveal that she's bipolar so I could have my bipolar friend! jk...sort of) she basically said it's all an act and that she's really good at faking - but even her saying that felt scripted somehow.

Anyways, I ran into her last night and it was really bizarre. At first she seemed just friendly and we were catching up, but then out of nowhere she starts telling me that she just went on her second date with a guy and oh by the way she's been sleeping with all of her girlfriends lately. okay. Then she says to my husband "how do you feel about me and your girlfriend being in love? Is that weird for you?" At the same time she was running around to different conversations and interrupting everyone and doing impressions - like extreme attention-getting type behavior. I would be talking to someone and she would cut in and just stand in front of them so I would talk to her instead. Very pushy and intrusive. In general it just feels like she is acting 100% of the time, like there is no real, genuine person or real emotions behind the curtains. My husband has known her a long time (he used to date her roommate) and said she's always had massive mood swings. In general she is known as the "crazy girl" but still has tons of friends, I think in part because she is really pretty and "cool."

Sorry this is so long, and I'm asking purely out of curiosity, but is this a 'standard' presentation of borderline?? When it was proposed I may have some borderline traits I did a lot of reading and this was not the impression I got at all.

[ComfortablyNumb5]

It sounds like borderline to me. But I just have to get this right... You're a married female, and you went out on a date with this girl or were seeing her? I think her eccentric personality is her way of getting attention.

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no, I didn't go on a date with her. I've never even hung out with her! I've only ever seen her in person 3 times - always just running into her at parties. The most we've ever communicated is through text message (she's a hair dresser and was going to do my hair...that's how this all started). That's why her comments were so out of left field.

[ComfortablyNumb5]

Oh ok sorry. I read this when I first woke up lol. But she very well could have BP too but this would mean you'd have to get to know her and witness her mood changes. Either one could be possible. Or both. Or none. Either way this isn't a woman id want as a friend. That's really creepy what she said to your hubby too. I'd stay away from her and walk in the other direction. Sorry I may be a bit harsh.

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[hopeless2015]

Her behavior would trigger me, my anxiety would be through the roof

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[Nammu]

BPD tend to exaggerate everything, a down day is major depression. They also get super close to people very quickly. When they get mad they can be vengeful.

I knew a BPD woman, she acted very immature and was always getting the latest fad diagnosis. Once we were at a meeting and deciding on a lunch, it had been resolved and suddenly she spoke up and says she can't eat that she's a vegetarian.....shes not, just wanted the attention, and the lunch debate began all over, it took much longer to resolve than it should have.

Like any illness there's degrees of severity, she sounds like a very severe case, the fact she knows her diagnose but doesn't seem interested in changing is telling. Just because you are nothing like her doesn't mean you don't have BPD it might mean you've a much milder form. Just like BP varies among all of us.

[MobiusPsyche]

Not everyone with borderline personality disorder is overly dramatic like this.

Originally Posted by RxQueen875

Oh ok sorry. I read this when I first woke up lol. But she very well could have BP too but this would mean you'd have to get to know her and witness her mood changes. Either one could be possible. Or both. Or none. Either way this isn't a woman id want as a friend. That's really creepy what she said to your hubby too. I'd stay away from her and walk in the other direction. Sorry I may be a bit harsh.

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no worries and yes, I don't plan on pursuing a friendship with her. I don't even really like her in general and she exhausts me - not worth it! I just have to figure out how to navigate our social circle...

Originally Posted by Nammu

BPD tend to exaggerate everything, a down day is major depression. They also get super close to people very quickly. When they get mad they can be vengeful.

I knew a BPD woman, she acted very immature and was always getting the latest fad diagnosis. Once we were at a meeting and deciding on a lunch, it had been resolved and suddenly she spoke up and says she can't eat that she's a vegetarian.....shes not, just wanted the attention, and the lunch debate began all over, it took much longer to resolve than it should have.

Like any illness there's degrees of severity, she sounds like a very severe case, the fact she knows her diagnose but doesn't seem interested in changing is telling. Just because you are nothing like her doesn't mean you don't have BPD it might mean you've a much milder form. Just like BP varies among all of us.

I honestly don't think I have BPD, even a mild form (not because of her, I just don't really relate to the description...) maybe I have 'traits' - like a history of cutting etc., but nothing too specific. I just did a lot of research when it was brought up to me awhile ago. I guess I was just surprised to witness the 'highs' of borderline, if that is indeed what's going on with this woman, because I always imagined the sad side of things. But according to her, she doesn't actually feel good on the inside, she's just acting out. I feel bad for her

Sounds a bit histrionic or HPD.

I've never met anyone like that. Manic or histrionic behavior came to mind. I really have no idea.

[Rjaye]

She's something. I'd stay away from her.