a bunch of my friends are getting together and by a bunch i mean like 6 so not really that many lol anyway 2 of them know i have been in and out of hospital for the last like year almost and and 1 of those 2 knows why but of course when we all get together there are going to be the usual how are you, what have you been up to questions and they are all at uni and stuff and i havent been since april. now i have know all the people for years some over 10 years and all over 7 years so i trust them and i dont think any would be mean but i dont know what to say should i be asked. has anyone told people about this sort of thing and what is going on with them? how did you do it and what was it like?

[bizi]

say what ever you feel comfortable. With that many people maybe there is one that you are really comfortable, ask her to lunch to share.
You have been thru so much this past year and are still going thru tough times.
This may not be the best time to go out with these friends.
I don't think I would announce to the group your problems, you could just say that you have been having a tough time of things and that you don't really feel comfortable talking about them.
They should respect you for that. And they may have lots to say, change the subject back to them.
bizi

Originally Posted by bizi

say what ever you feel comfortable. With that many people maybe there is one that you are really comfortable, ask her to lunch to share.
You have been thru so much this past year and are still going thru tough times.
This may not be the best time to go out with these friends.
I don't think I would announce to the group your problems, you could just say that you have been having a tough time of things and that you don't really feel comfortable talking about them.
They should respect you for that. And they may have lots to say, change the subject back to them.
bizi

I wouldn't say anything to the whole group at once just if people ask me one on one. I think going out with them could be good it might take my mind off things. But i am also nervous i will freak out idk i will see how i am feeling.

[bizi]

when is the gathering?

Originally Posted by bizi

when is the gathering?

in a month

i'm 1 of these people who hates hiding behind a mask

if people ask me something, i'll come straight out with it. then I find it's up to the person how they react- if they are a true friend, they will understand and support you.

if not, well, at least you were honest with them.

i am thinking is just being honest if someone asks just because i am tired of lying

[bizi]

When do you see your pdoc? soon right?
they will probably either up your abilify or add another medication as you are still psychotic/manic, if you are still having these false beliefs about angels and stuff.
standing on things....etc.
In regards to the group meeting, since it is a month away. This will give you some time to talk with some of your friends one on one to tell them what you have been going thru, privately.
then when you go out in a month perhaps you could just have fun and enjoy their company and it would be a nice distraction.
Bizi

Originally Posted by bizi

When do you see your pdoc? soon right?
they will probably either up your abilify or add another medication as you are still psychotic/manic, if you are still having these false beliefs about angels and stuff.
standing on things....etc.
In regards to the group meeting, since it is a month away. This will give you some time to talk with some of your friends one on one to tell them what you have been going thru, privately.
then when you go out in a month perhaps you could just have fun and enjoy their company and it would be a nice distraction.
Bizi

Yeah I see the psychiatrist soon. As for the friends how do I start the conversation though like what do I say.....?

[bizi]

Eden,
Perhaps you could just tell them that you have something important to tell them. That you value their friendship and want to be honest about what has been going on in your life. You could ask them if they want to hear your story and if they have time to hear it. Then you could briefly tell them what has been going on with you. Ask for their support. They will want to know how they can help you.
You may get a shocked reaction from them, they may need time to digest this and process it.You could simply ask if it would be ok to call and talk when you are having a rough time, to listen to you, maybe even come over to just be with you. To help you feel safe.
I think you are wanting to trust them.
It is very important to have friends that you can trust and be honest with.
I wish you much luck. Friends can be so helpful and supportive. I hate to say this But don't expect that all 7 of them will be able to support you. And you will probably have to have several conversations about this. Time is your friend.
(((((HUGS))))
bizi

I don't expect them all to take it well but I hope they can be ok with it eventually I am just sick of lying and coming up with stupid excuses.

[mtnannie]

I agree that it would be good to do it one on one. I usually find a place in the conversation where I can say somethg like, "Yea, I'm bipolar and when that happens I _________." Something that relates to a bipolar symptom. I find it easy to bring it up like that and to do it casually. Then their reaction is theirs.

I did have a problem with a friend whose mother had been bipolar and was unmedicated and destroyed her childhood. She is part of my social group. I told most everyone else before I told her hoping that the rumor mill would at least drop a hint before I had to tell her, and also that she would see me handling life well for a while. It went well too.

Originally Posted by mtnannie

I agree that it would be good to do it one on one. I usually find a place in the conversation where I can say somethg like, "Yea, I'm bipolar and when that happens I _________." Something that relates to a bipolar symptom. I find it easy to bring it up like that and to do it casually. Then their reaction is theirs.

I did have a problem with a friend whose mother had been bipolar and was unmedicated and destroyed her childhood. She is part of my social group. I told most everyone else before I told her hoping that the rumor mill would at least drop a hint before I had to tell her, and also that she would see me handling life well for a while. It went well too.

yeah it is just hard to find a way to start the conversation but i think it needs to happen eventually i feel like or otherwise it will come out in a bad way and i dont want that. half my friends are doing psych degrees anyway so i think they know there is something up with me they just go with it.

[Bluegirl1226]

I don't know what to tell you because I just revealed my status to someone I thought was my friend and they don't know how to handle it. As a matter of fact I haven't heard back from him since I told him. I am hurt and feel very rejected. The point I am at right now I wouldn't recommend revealing your status. That's just me.

[Moose72]

In my experience you sure find out who your friends are. I had a friend tell me she didnt want me around her kids! She understands now and we are great friends.