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#1
Nov 27, 2016, 04:37 AM
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Here is a sonnet I wrote. Just trying to get my work out there to test responses. Don't feel you have to like it. The truth will do. I wrote this about 8 months after my husband left me. It was for a class at university.
Three Days My feet pace the places his once did walk, Shoeless, wearing holes in my thin, damp socks. The candles flicker, shadows wave on white walls, Water falls from the tap in single drops. Three days ago you left, three nights I’ve paced, Outside the times I have been frozen still Staring at your badly worn boots still laced, As if you could be summoned back by will. Could there have been a love stronger than ours, Or loftier place from which to be thrown? Always and forever were our sweet vows, Vows by fickle circumstance overthrown. Time ceases; to my anguish I’m now bound, Endlessly wandering this sacred ground.
__________________
Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD  "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
 Anonymous45023, MtnTime2896, Nammu, Unrigged64072835, Wild Coyote, Yours_Truly
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 *Laurie*, ComfortablyNumb5, MtnTime2896, Nammu, TishaBuv, Wild Coyote, Yours_Truly
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#2
Nov 27, 2016, 06:10 AM
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I like it.
__________________
"Give him his freedom and he'll remember his humanity." |
| Wander
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#3
Nov 27, 2016, 10:24 AM
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Very sad but good.
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| Wander
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#4
Nov 27, 2016, 10:48 AM
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I like it. it invokes the feeling of loss and sadness. All great art invokes feeling and this is no exception.
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| Wander
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#5
Nov 27, 2016, 02:36 PM
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I liked it very much also & it made me sad too.
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| Wander
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#6
Nov 27, 2016, 02:51 PM
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I like it, too!
 I can feel every line. What talent! Thanks so much for sharing! WC |
| Wander
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#7
Nov 27, 2016, 03:18 PM
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Very expressive, love it.
__________________
Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
| Wander
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#8
Nov 27, 2016, 03:57 PM
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Very clever, Wander! Well done.
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| Wander
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#9
Nov 27, 2016, 06:31 PM
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It's good and I get it. I'm going through a breakup right now and I'm not doing good at all
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#10
Nov 27, 2016, 08:20 PM
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Thanks everyone for the feedback and for putting up with my writing that I am sharing. I wrote all these in 2013 and am trying to motivate myself to get writing again but I feel like i suck at it and can't find words anymore. Your support means more than words can say.
__________________
Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
| Nammu
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#11
Nov 27, 2016, 09:21 PM
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The muse is often a fickle friend.
__________________
Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
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