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Member Since Aug 2016
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#1
I've been wondering how much awareness of your disorder helps in mediating episodes. I was diagnosed late last summer so I'm still trying to get a hold on this.For example: I was very aware that I was becoming depressed this past winter. In fact.. I feel like I felt the moment it hit. I knew I was getting depressed. I know what the symptoms are. I knew I didn't have a reason to get depressed. But... the hopelessness was there anyway. So I'm wondering about mania. I'm getting into that time of year. I know I can feel mania coming on now. At least I think I do. I know that it causes me to make very, very bad decisions. Now that I know about it... can I just say no? Or.. will I create a wreck regardless?
__________________ ---------------------------------------------------- Bipolar I Meds: Lamictal 100 mg, Wellbutrin 300mg, Latuda 40mg |
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Silver Swan
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#2
You do have a say over your own actions. Getting revved up and dancing in circles might happen anyway.
__________________ Wellbutrin XL 300 mg Ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 20 mg 2x/day Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) |
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Grand Magnate
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#3
It's easier to feel depressive episodes come on IMO. (Hypo) mania takes more awareness, for me at least. I had a Dr. teach me relapse prevention. It helped me to be aware of when episodes are coming on so I can do something about it before it got out of control. Unfortunately, this illness can make you hyper aware of any and all changes you experience because it takes time to know what is a real episode or what is just a natural part of life for everyone.
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seoultous
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#4
__________________ ---------------------------------------------------- Bipolar I Meds: Lamictal 100 mg, Wellbutrin 300mg, Latuda 40mg |
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Member
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#5
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I've started using a cool mood chart on my phone.. so hoping to get some knowledge from that. I'm jealous that you have a doctor teaching those things. Is this a psychologist? I live in such a remote area we have so little in the way of mental health care options. Only one psychologist and the bridges were burned with as soon as I got my bipolar diagnosis and started on medication. We have two psychiatrists.. and they seem to be good. But they don't do anything other than check up on me to make sure my meds are working. __________________ ---------------------------------------------------- Bipolar I Meds: Lamictal 100 mg, Wellbutrin 300mg, Latuda 40mg |
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#6
I hate to be a Debbie Downer but i've been diagnosed 25 years and i have not found that knowing about episodes has helped me. I know that's not what you want to hear.
I can detect the early stages of hypomania and may go see my doctor for more meds but we haven't found any that help. I find doctors just prescribe extra Seroquel for hypomania but it gives me akathisia so i can't take it. If my mood gets too high i lose all insight and just think i've 'healed myself' and am no longer bipolar and will feel fantastic til the end of my days... It never lasts. During the Winter i get depressed and i'm also aware of what's happening at first but then when it gets more intense i feel like i'm so under-water that i'm overwhelmed and just think life has gotten mediocre again and there will be no end... But happily, that doesn't last either! In 2014 and 2015 i got Spring hypomanias and started very unwise renovation projects both years. But in 2016 i didn't get any. I'm hoping to skip it again this year. I used to get Fall hypomania too. Patterns change. I made a plan that if hypomania ever hits again i will be a tourist in my own city, which is a lovely city and see all the sights and do other benign activities to exhaust myself. Could you write yourself just such a contingency plan? Last edited by Anonymous41462; Feb 27, 2017 at 08:14 PM.. |
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Anonymous59125, Sad Mermaid, xRavenx
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Magnate
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Location: New York
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#7
I've been diagnosed for 20 years and know the signs and symptoms very well. That doesn't give me any more control over the episodes. The only thing that does anything for me is med changes when necessary.
__________________ Meds: Latuda, Lamictal XR, Vyvanse, Seroquel, Klonopin Supplements: Monster Energy replacement. Also DLPA, tyrosine, glutamine, and tryptophan |
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#8
I also get akathisia from high doses of Seroquel, apfei - it is a rare side effect but boy, does akathisia feel like internal torture to me...
mossanimal: 10 years since the diagnosis, I am beginning to benefit from self-awareness. Last week I recognized that my wanting to buy a computer for home use was hypomanic, and that I could purchase paniers for my bike and transport the work computer home this way. But I made so many errors in the past before reaching this stage of self-awareness. Notice what is happening with you and eventually you might get there. A contingency plan also is a good idea. A formal application of that idea is WRAP=Wellness and Recovery Action Plan, by Mary Ellen Copeland. Look up her website for very cool ideas. __________________ Dx: Bipolar I w/Psychotic Features Rx: Seroquel ER 550 mg, Depakote ER 1000 mg, Melatonin 6 mg, Atarax 50 mg. |
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apfei
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Innerzone, mossanimal
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Grand Magnate
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#9
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mossanimal
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#10
Yes.. I realize that self-awareness is only going to go so far. And I can see how higher forms of mania can totally negate that benefit...especially when delusions are involved. But I do see how recognizing early stages and being aware of red flags can help. My wife is starting to recognize them. Big, new piles of books smells like a rat here.
__________________ ---------------------------------------------------- Bipolar I Meds: Lamictal 100 mg, Wellbutrin 300mg, Latuda 40mg |
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Grand Magnate
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#11
Having someone else point out your behavior can help. He or she may be able to tell when your behavior deviates if they they know you really well.
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Grand Poohbah
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#12
I'm still working on trying to figure out my episodes and the triggers that cause them. I too was only diagnosed last summer and it's been a roller coaster ever since.
__________________ Dx: BP2 and MDD Current meds: 100mg Wellbutrin; 200mg Lamictal; 400mg Seroquel at night; Xanax 1mg/PRN; 100mg/PRN Trazodone at night for insomnia Diagnosed in May 2016 |
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Musician1980
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Grand Magnate
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#13
When I begin sliding into a depressive episode it is pretty clear to me as I notice my mood drop, sleep increase, thoughts darken and motivation disappear. Knowing what is happening helps me get to the pdoc earlier and start treatment. This does help most times but some times the depression is unmoved by medication changes, lifestyle changes etc and I just have to sit it out.
Mania or hypomania on the other hard is obvious to those around me but I either can not see it or just don't want to. Getting me to comply with treatment is more difficult as I am having too much fun, or am deluded. In the very early stages I can tell things are going off as I notice a reduced need for sleep, racing thoughts, increased motivation, agitation and euphoria. Sadly most times I ignore the warning signs as I love the feeling. Only when the agitation and irritability become unbearable do I ask for help. By then I am usually going into a mixed state and they are tough to get out of. I really am trying hard to nip hypomania in the bud now since I had a horrible psychotic manic episode late last year. Hopefully I will learn from my mistakes. __________________ Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
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apfei, bizi, gina_re, JustJace2u, Musician1980, Sad Mermaid, Unrigged64072835
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#14
I also know because colors change. When I am depressed, there are no colors - in my mind's eye, everything is a shade of grey.
When I am hypomanic, the colors are extremely bright. When I am at baseline, I see colors the way they are. I do not have acute awareness of colors, but neither is everything grey for me. __________________ Dx: Bipolar I w/Psychotic Features Rx: Seroquel ER 550 mg, Depakote ER 1000 mg, Melatonin 6 mg, Atarax 50 mg. |
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apfei, bizi
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Grand Magnate
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#15
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__________________ Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
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apfei, bizi
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Sad Mermaid
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#16
Thanks for the comments folks. So... because of my acute self-awareness.. I can see knowing when I'm going manic. I can see knowing that I'm starting to make bad decisions.. but just don't care maybe. This reminds me of last springs episode when I was making a very bad decision.. I knew it was bad but was compelled. The 'knowing' led to agitation, anxiety and irritability. But at the same time that I knew it was bad.. I was also deluded that it was going to be awesome in the bigger picture and that any problems I created would be worth it. That was before my diagnosis though...
__________________ ---------------------------------------------------- Bipolar I Meds: Lamictal 100 mg, Wellbutrin 300mg, Latuda 40mg |
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Sad Mermaid
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Wise Elder
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#17
I'm going to go with the carefully-worded answer, "it can help to mitigate". Not it will, but it can. It's possible. While the knowledge itself won't likely prevent anything, actions taken from this knowledge/observation can help, like getting a med change or checking with others for feedback.
Like Sad Mermaid, it might be recognizing hypo coming on by wanting to buy something. I've tuned into this one over the years and I'm like 10 years out from dx too. It takes time, and some signs will be easier to recognize than others. WANTING to stop is another matter altogether. I'll often talk myself out of seeing sense. Which is where input from others really comes in handy. Even with dx and knowledge, being "sensible" will still be a challenge, but you'll be in a better position for the fight. A lot of books is a sign here too. Before the internet, I'd pretty much be waiting at the doors for the library to open once I got some burning idea. And proceed to clear off the subject shelf, lol. __________________ ********* Mr. Robot Makes me sick to the heart, Oh I feel so tired. And the way the rain comes down hard, that's how I feel inside. --The Cure
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bizi
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Nammu, Sad Mermaid
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#18
Me too. I have abnormally deep self-awareness ("self-insight" my therapist calls it) but it doesn't prevent the episodes. They still happen like clockwork. I'm really angry right now about the reality of this.
__________________ Dx: Bipolar II, ultra rapid cycling but meds help with the severity of cycling. Rx: lamictal, seroquel, lithium |
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bizi
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Magnate
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#19
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I don't get angry at the disease anymore. Maybe it's just time that has built in the "acceptance" factor, but that's the way I feel about it. I have accepted that I'll always cycle. __________________ Meds: Latuda, Lamictal XR, Vyvanse, Seroquel, Klonopin Supplements: Monster Energy replacement. Also DLPA, tyrosine, glutamine, and tryptophan |
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VanGore28
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#20
I didn't know I was manic when I was. I know it better now. I still have cycles (like the "depressive" episode I'm in now) but with the meds they aren't as bad, except for the anxiety. I can tell I'm depressed though. That seems to be a regular thing.
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