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#1
Aug 12, 2017, 10:01 PM
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My bf has been hospitalized in psyche wards with suicide attempts, psychosis where they held him down with restraints for 5 days and now a detailed suicide plan that wound him up in the third psyche hospital. All in 4 weeks.
I don't know if I can handle this. All attempts came from me 'needing space.' he is terrified of abandonment and hurts himself if he thinks I'm going to leave.. But I am not to blame...only known him 6 months...his pain deep inside has been around within him long before me. Not all the razor marks are new...what am I to do? I too suffer from BP! and Anxiety and BPD. Is this just hopeless? Us together I mean...? The problem with 'stable' healthy people is that they don't fully understand mental illness so that's what me and the bf have in common...much compassion for the other one's suffering and a non judgmental accepting attitude when we ef up. Anybody out there survive in a duo mental illness relationship. What do you do together to stabilize? I so want it to work but I'm scared. It's easy to walk away but not when you love someone as I love him... Quote...It is better to have loved and lost than to never loved at all... WHYYYYYY I saw my Mother get dumped by my Father for a younger lady and tore the family up. Im so scared of being abandoned that I'm always the leaver. The one who is most afraid of abandonement always leaves first... |
 Anonymous59125, Sunflower123, Vaporeon
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#2
Aug 12, 2017, 10:15 PM
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BP relationships can work. In the best situation you lean on your therapist more then each other. Your therapists should talk if possible because his "issues" will flare your "issues" but therapists are the professionals. If you try to play therapist your relationship will suffer and you'll do more harm then help. It sounds like your BF needs partial hospitalization or intensive out patient. If you want to help find one in your area he can transfer to when he gets out. He needs to learn how to keep himself safe. Right now while he's there concentrate in stabilizing yourself.
__________________
Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
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#3
Aug 12, 2017, 10:43 PM
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Quote:
It has the potential to work out, but both parties need to understand how to deal with their issues or handle them better so that it doesn't affect the triggers so deeply. |
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#4
Aug 12, 2017, 11:09 PM
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Bad idea. I met my ex-wife in the hospital & our mental health issues only made a bad relationship worse.
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| Anonymous59125
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#5
Aug 12, 2017, 11:18 PM
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I agree with the previous two posters. I'm sorry you're in such a tough situation. Sending big hugs.
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#6
Aug 13, 2017, 10:41 AM
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I agree with laracroft, both people need to be actively participating in treatment. It can definitely work but if one Or neither is interested in doing whatever it takes to get better and change problem behaviors it won't work out.
__________________
Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
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