Don't know how to feel anymore

I'm trying so hard to make things better and to get better but how am I supposed to make progress when I feel like it's all one sided? I really miss my friend but I try not to think of him. I stopped talking to him. I've tried to start talking to my husband about stuff but it never goes over well. We always just end up arguing and I'm just left feeling worse. It doesn't help that I don't feel like he's passionate about me or us anymore even though he says he is. His actions do not show it and I don't feel it. I miss they way things used to be. I just feeling I'm going to be stuck in this depression forever because nothing is going to change. I can't even open up to my husband about stuff and our sex life isn't any better. It all just makes me feel like what's the point. And now I really don't have anyone at all. I even asked him about going to couples counseling and he said he doesn't need that. So that's a no. It's so crazy, I love him is much and couldn't imagine not being with him but I'm just so exhausted mentally of all of this. I don't even think he realizes there are problems even though I try to tell him. Thanks for reading, just needed to vent I guess.

I’m sorry your husband is unresponsive. When my husband was alive we went through periods like that. It was rough but we got through them. I hope you keep trying. I know it’s tough but giving up would be worse.