[SparkySmart]

Really, why do I bother going to bed at all? Sometimes Ambien works, mostly not. Trazodone works, but the side effects are intolerable.

So last night, I rearranged my bedroom furniture instead of sleeping. This meant emptying drawers from dressers, pushing and pulling large pieces of furniture an inch at a time, and then adjusting everything just so. The thing is, my bedroom can only be reasonably arranged one way that makes sense, so I had to put some pieces in the garage to make it work. I've tried this arrangement before and found it impractical, so I'll probably put it all back tonight. Knowing this, I didn't re-hang my pictures. Thank goodness I live alone.

All the while, I was thinking about something. For the umpteenth time, I just got out of the hospital last week (yawn). It was a 16-bed acute-care ward; there were only ten patients. Of these, three were screaming incessantly about their rights and demanding to see their attorneys. In the end, one finally calmed down, but two left against medical advice. The two who left made their way out loudly and victoriously; they had fought the system and won. Even a casual observer could see that neither had much chance at succeeding on the outside, but what could their doctors do? An uncooperative patient who has no intention of harming himself can't be held against his will, so...

I thought last night about how many chances we actually get in life to be helped; how long it is until others just shrug and let us go our own ways. Maybe some of us get dozens of opportunities, but others maybe just one? The odds are stacked against these two, but they couldn't/wouldn't accept a hand out of their misery. One asked for my phone number on her way out, and I refused; real friendships can't be forged in so short a time. I'm not an ideal patient by any stretch, but I know how much I'll sacrifice to pay this bill, and I didn't take one moment for granted.

So anyway, I worry about them.

[Daonnachd]

Have you seen Raven's thread about improving sleep? Take a look, it's got lots of ideas: https://forums.psychcentral.com/bipo...ing-sleep.html