Functioning on a job

Hello everyone,

I have not worked since 2012 and it took a while to get my disability. It’s hard being on disability if you once had a better paying job. I worked as a social worker for years. I had a bad panic attack at my job and left the office. My doc saw me as a walk-in and thought I had PTSD and adjustment disorder from work. I was placed on leave and referred to a DO, provider and later a psychiatrist that diagnosed me with BP1. I started meds and therapy. It is really hard being on disability. I want the best for my eleven year old plus I did not get a degree to not use it. I have thought about returning to the workforce. My concerns are if I’ll be able to preform well. I have poor memory and problems with cognitive dysfunction. Following directions can be very hard for me if there are several steps not written down. I know many people with bipolar work on this forum. For those that have symptoms how do you manage and work?

It's tough to be on disability. I am, too, and I'd love to go back to work. Yet, I cannot. I hope you get lots of helpful responses to your thread. Thanks for being you!

WC

I am back working part time doing 16 hours a week and it's not easy going back even part time. I hadnt worked in four years. Im adjusting better to it now.

Start off slow

SSDI has the ticket to work program.. that could be helpful for you.

I’m just unable to work and it’s so hard to accept, doubt I’ll ever fully accept it.

I make lists, use sticky notes, and set alarms to remember to go to meetings.

I take my meds in the evening unless it’s really bad, then I will take only a 100 mg gabapentin for anxiety during the day.

I see a therapist to help me with strategies to deal with work stress.

People really only want a competent person they like to work with, you don’t need to be perfect!

I wish I had some words of wisdom for you, Coco, but I don't. I haven't worked in four years, am on SSDI, and have a lot of the same cognitive/memory problems you do. But I just wanted you to know I feel you and support you in whatever you decide to do.

Power on through: routine, discipline, lots of self care. I was on disability for 10 years after my dx, my child was 6-16 years old. My dx was also work related, I tried going back to work after my divorce and had a crisis which pushed me to seek help.
I did a lot of therapy over those 10 years, I had another dx besides bp that I had to treat.
I also rejoined the work force in a new career as my previous one was too triggering, and I had to start over, which hasn’t been easy but I’ve made it.

I was rewarded disability; SSI, but I had over two thousand dollars in the bank and couldn't qualify. Now I work in an on-call part-time position in my field. The hours are limited but the money is good. I've held the job for 6 months.

I've been hospitalized over ten times, several suicide attempts, relationship struggles, rapid cycling mood, anxiety, panic, BPD,ADD...and so on. I went for years without working and then I went back and I've never felt better about myself.

If someone like me can do it, I know you can do it!

I only work part-time and I attribute this to at least some of my stability. I guess the question for you, or at least in part, would be a financial one: would you earn more part-time than on disability benefits. If the answer is yes, it might be worth a try; I think working -if you can do it- can do wonders for one's self-esteem. I hear you on the cognitive dysfunction, I suffer from this as well. I don't work in an office atmosphere, but in healthcare, but I take far more notes now than I used to; it's something I have to do and have had to accept it.

I manage to work full time because I was denied SSD and because I like to eat and to sleep indoors. Necessity is a powerful motivator.

I push through my day by staying busy. I concentrate on my work and take one task at a time. If I get overwhelmed, I take an early lunch or I take a break to walk around the office or the parking lot to clear my head.

I do forget stuff a lot and I'm really bad at taking notes so I'm working on that atm.

It's really not the BP that causes an issue it's my ADD more than anything. So what I do is force myself (with the help of adderall) to work 30 mins and then take 5 mins off. Or during tax season I work until I finish a tax return and then take a small break before picking up another one. It's hard to stay on task, but knowing I'll get a break when I do helps a lot. And as long as my boss can see that I'm making progress he really doesn't care how many small breaks I take.

Other than that, I don't really have any other coping skills in my tool belt. Hopefully it all works out for you.

Thanks for sharing your story. I have BP1 and have been lucky enough to maintain full-time employment since my diagnosis. What has helped me is that I get a lot of pride from my work (data analytics) and I have a lot of input into my work product.

You have a few areas to consider before making the decision to rejoin the workplace. First, an option that may help you transition easier would be to start doing volunteer work to build up your work experience and it may give you an opportunity to try a new and more rewarding career field.

For instance, with a social work background- perhaps you could go into non-profit fundraising or doing work with a non-profit as a volunteer manager. Being a social worker is one of the most emotionally demanding professions- it is very easy to get overworked and have a high case load. Establishing those boundaries with clients, and still doing a holistic review of their needs is a hard skill set even for someone without mental illness.

So I would suggest first volunteer to update your experience and meet new people, then seek part-time employment that doesn't go over your SSDI limitations to get your feet wet. If those things go well, then start looking for full-time. But give yourself plenty of time for that adjustment.