just how long can mixed state bipolar last?

I have bipolar I, but my new pdoc saw me at the end of March, and he felt that I was mixed; it's on the medical records I got from the clinic. When I got the records for my retiring pdoc, his for me so far were in there too, and I really doubted him about that. However, as more and more time goes by, I feel like I am getting more mixed by the day, f***ing panic attacks lasting hours, anxiety, up, down, on a project one day, crying uncontrollabe the next afternoon. When pdoc filled out disability papers that I got yesterday, he cited the reason I couldn't work as bipolar I mixed severe. Does he think I am still mixed? I do now feel mixed and have for some time if I think about it. Going back to the end of March, and he could be right, I remember I wasn't sleeping much, and that concerned me but then I think about it, if he asked questions about my self-esteem, I would have said it was zilch. Or sometimes I want to be more involved and sometimes I don't. 95% of the time I have racing thoughts. I wouldn't care if I went to sleep and didn't wake up the next day (no thoughts of suicide, just something happening naturally). I can hardly ever sit still.

But I definitely think he's right about it being mixed right now. So have I been mixed for months? Or mixed and getting worse? Seems like I wouldn't just happen to schedule every pdoc appt. on a mixed day.

Just how long will I be mixed? Because it's starting to feel like forever, and I am beyond sick of it.

You are definitely not alone!

Many people here at PC go through very lengthy "mixed" episodes of BPI or BPII. It gets very tiring! I am going on just over 6 months of being "mixed" (BPII). I'm trying to be patient, taking it day-by-day.


WC

—the mixed episodes are more likely to happen, will be more pronounced, and will last longer when u r under stress. Oh joy, right? I am speaking from experience . As you probably know, I have mixed bp. I have had a rough ride since moving to Phoenix with all the big transitions. I don’t have ED to deal w except for some binge eating coupled w a less active lifestyle than when I was working in LA. When I am really in bad shape, I try do work on one major project at a time(t’s best suggestion ever), then veg w streaming videos. Hope this helps.

I'm sorry about all you're dealing with. Thanks for an honest reply. Though I read it and thought, "Oh, that's just great!" (sarcastically)

Sorry for you too. 6 months, OMG, I guess I'm there too.

It sucks so much going through this

Mixed seems to be my baseline when I am not stable. I have BP2 but not the usual common depressive cycles that go with 2 typically. I cycle in and out of mixed states frequently when I'm unstable. It is completely and utterly frustrating and exhausting.

I do agree with the previous poster who says mixed states are frequently driven by stress. Unfortunately, I experience high levels of stress alot due to my job, my son's struggles due to his autism and my mother's health issues.

I had to drop my Adderall and Wellbutrin when I had crossed into a mixed episode. Those meds were making me far too anxious, 24/7.

I stick to my schedule, even though I am bored to death because I cannot sleep much at all. I still go to bed at the same time and allow myself to get up at the usual time, as well.

I agree that stress adds a lot to mixed episodes. I have been under a lot of stress now for a long time. In addition to dealing with MI and painful physical conditions, I also look after my elderly mother; she has had a few surgeries and has an ongoing serious infection caused by surgery.

H sometimes has to travel for work. His job is increasingly demanding every summer.

All too much to mention here.

I try to work on my stress level. So much stress gets the best of me via my own perception of stress/stressors. I have been trying to change my perspective so my "perceived stress" level are lower and lower, despite stressors remaining the same. (In other words, trying to minimize my reactions to stress.)

I hope you get a break soon.


WC

Without the Wellbutrin though, I ended up in a depressive state. Adderall, we will just have to see. It's newish to me but does seem to let me be able to watch a TV show or read which I couldn't do well for many months. If the anxiety gets under better control now that I have Buspar again, I will have to re-evaluate. Worth the trade-off or not? I had pretty high anxiety and even a few long panic attacks before starting Adderall, and there is no question my anxiety level has shot up to outer space by now. IDK, when I get depressed, pdocs usually give me Wellbutrin or Effexor, they seem to work best for me, but Effexor is a lot harder to stop.

We are each different. It's all about which works for you!

WC

I can only speak for myself and my particular psychiatrist.

As far as the diagnosis that prints out on paperwork from my psychiatrist's computer, it has been Bipolar 1 with Mixed Episodes for at least 10 or more years. I have definitely not been in a mixed episode for even much of that time. Most of that time I was stable, euphoric hypomanic, or mildly depressed. I have had severe full blown manias, some with mixed features, and depressions, but less often than stability and mild mood episodes. I think my psychiatrist just leaves the Bipolar 1 with Mixed Episodes in his computer and never changes it. Ever. I think he chose that because I do in fact have Bipolar 1, and my very worst and most frequent episodes requiring hospitalizations were full manic episodes with mixed features. I do also often have euphoric hypomanias that tend to eventually turn mixed over time and at their worst. I kind of agree with him that this is a common characteristic of my bipolar disorder. Perhaps your psychiatrist changes your diagnosis in terms of episode type every time it changes? I wouldn't know that. I do believe hospitals mark the episodes as they see them during hospitalizations. At least mine have. I've been Bipolar 1 the whole time, but in some it is manic, others mixed episodes, others depression. I've had psychosis with pure depression, pure mania, and mixed states. Sometimes I don't have psychosis.

I have had mixed states that lasted hours to several months. On good medications they last days max. Sometimes my moods are all over the place. My mixed episodes are usually simultaneously elevated and depressed (high energy, impulsive, desperate).

Mixed episodes are my default go-to position. Last year was a doozy with a mixed episode lasting from Feb to Nov (10 months). In my case mixed episodes always feature SI.

Not what I wanted to hear, but it makes sense. This is a new pdoc for me; I have only been seeing him for 6 months, and I did have a gap where I didn't change meds or see pdocs in person what with healing from surgery. So I don't know. He might change it if he feels it's warranted. Or maybe I spend a lot of time mixed with some doozies of depressive and dramatic manic episodes thrown in now & again. You know, just to shake things up a bit.

I used to SI in college but don't any more. I think it would freak H to the point of taking my daughter and out and out leaving. And I wouldn't doubt H would be the best person to raise my daughter if we can't raise her together; he loves her so much. And I know his love for her is stronger than his love for me, not that he doesn't love me, it's just a parent's love is so strong. He would protect her before me, and I wouldn't fault him at all. It would freak my daughter out too if she saw something. It doesn't mean I don't want to SI, just that I don't act it out.

----she said she reduced the wellbutrin, not dropped it.
I do this too w my docs agreement when Im hypomanic.