Does anyone have issues with family members? Triggering ones, maybe?

I swear that my sister is the most manipulative person out there. No exaggeration: she will LITERALLY whine and cry when she doesn’t get her way. She’ll first try other manipulation tactics first, but if all else fail, then she does the crying thing.

We hardly ever talk, and the only time we DO talk is when she wants something from me, usually money or something that involves money. She thinks because I have a job that I will automatically buy things for her.

She’s also just a cold-hearted b_tch. She purposely finds reasons to get offended so that she can make you look bad and feel like she’s the superior one. If you walk a certain way, she’ll accuse you of doing something mean. “You’re walking like you’re trying to mock someone. Who are you trying to mock?” Err... no, I’m just walking.

She tries to live a lavish lifestyle with student loans and no job. She literally used $250 of her savings just to buy a Gucci belt for the sake of showing off the logo. In fact, she REFUSES to wear ANY piece of clothing that doesn’t have a logo on it, and that logo BETTER be from a “popular company” or god help us all. She expects me to get her expensive gifts like that, and in return, she’ll get me a few chocolate Hershey bars for like $5. I don’t expect gifts from anyone, but it just goes to show where her priorities lie.

Today, she b_tched me out for making fun of a photo she took. It was a picture of a painting of Jesus and there was a reflection of green aliens on it. (The aliens were probably a reflection from someone’s shirt or something, or a camera flash.) And well, Jesus was looking upward where the “aliens” were and I said that it looked like he was scared of the aliens trying to invade his cloud. Then she flipped out at me and said that I’m a POS and how dare I make fun of Jesus. She told me she didn’t want to talk to me ever again because it was “the biggest insult ever.” But I know she’ll talk to me because she’ll come crawling when she wants something.

[cashart10]

I am so sorry you have to deal with that from your own sister! That sounds so petty to me! I had a friend like this. We grew up across the street from each other. We were together in diapers and she was my maid of honor, etc. Her sister married my brother though and her sister had a falling out with her family which in turn meant a falling out with my then friend and me about 6 or 7 years ago. As far as I see it though, no more drama! I do now wish I had asked my sister to be my maid of honor. I think I will encourage my girls to do that (if they have that kind of relationship of course).

[AspiringAuthor]

"You said you would never talk with me again, ever - what happened?!?!"

[Sunflower123]

I’m sorry you are having issues with your sister. She sounds like a pain in the neck. You don’t need that kind of toxicity.

For a long time, I would have panic attacks around my sister because she is hostile, aggressive and verbally abusive. Our relationship was strained and I blocked her and had no communication with her for my peace of mind.

When I did let her back in my life...she started ranting and screaming one day and I walked out on her and told her I have no intention of ever being around that kind of behavior again. She sincerely apologized and has been on her best behavior since then. We get along much better now. I am firm on not putting up with her nonsense. I’ll just leave.

Can you limit exposure to your sister for some peace of mind?

[Victoria'smom]

My older sister is like that. My parent's bail her out all the time. I limit my exposure she lives upstairs from me and I see her x a week maybe.

[Tryingtobehappy5]

All of my family is like that. I sometimes talk to my siblings for a while but as soon as something happens contact ends. Everyone has a lot of issues they dont deal with.

I cut my mom out of my life a year ago completely. She texts me once in a while and I ignore it. When I was in the hospital last she showed up but I just stared at her. She has kept asking during other hospitalizations and I always said no so she knew I wouldnt want her there. Anyways my eyes were open so wide and my pupils were so dilated I looked like I could stare into your soul. I even scared myself in the mirror lol. I got some satisfaction from that, she said her sad little piece and left.

I feel bad for my family, they have all gone through their own things and life hasnt been easy on any of us. I still have to put myself first though. The last time I talked to my mom I literally ended up going IP that night. She doesnt care about anyone but herself and she has shown that over and over in my life.

[bunnyhabit]

i like visiting my mom but my dad always takes advantage of me when I do. such a pervert he is but until he is lame snaked down there keep us separated

Do you live with your sister? If so, you can cut off the relationship for a while and perhaps it could improve in the future. She might mature a bit. Or not. If you do live with her, you can do your best to avoid her. Let her know you find her toxic and that for your health you need to separate from her for a while. If she harasses you by phone, block her number.

[sarahsweets]

You have to stop all contact with your sister until you are strong enough to say no to her again.

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm so sorry, bluebicycle Unfortunately there are many people like her. It's even harde when they're the people that should be the closest to us. I agree with what all the others have already wisely said. Just cut off contacts with her if you can. After all, she did say she doesn't want to talk to you ever again, right? You don't need more toxic people in your life. Get rid of them if you can. You need to take care of yourself first after all. It's just self-preservation. I'm so sorry, I know it's hard. Please don't give up. I hope you'll feel better soon. It must be a very stressful situation for you. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. Sending many hugs to you

[tmg4me]

My sister and I have no contact at all. She is a very narcissistic, abrasive, mean person. She has spread lies about me. She texted me once telling me that I was a "you are nothing but a F***** sick twisted Bipolar B****". It's best we stay apart. Our relationship just brought alot of turmoil and misery in my life and I don't need that especially for my own mental health. My family is the type that if we argue we don't talk about it we just end up cutting all ties with eachother. It's very sad. But you have to stay away from toxic people for your own health, sanity and peace of mind.

Originally Posted by cashart10

I am so sorry you have to deal with that from your own sister! That sounds so petty to me! I had a friend like this. We grew up across the street from each other. We were together in diapers and she was my maid of honor, etc. Her sister married my brother though and her sister had a falling out with her family which in turn meant a falling out with my then friend and me about 6 or 7 years ago. As far as I see it though, no more drama! I do now wish I had asked my sister to be my maid of honor. I think I will encourage my girls to do that (if they have that kind of relationship of course).

Yeah. She also is trying to sell some of my late grandmother's belongings, such as some of her necklaces that she gave her before she died, for money. She's listed everything online. And of course I can't do anything about it since the necklaces etc are technically hers. I may offer to buy them if she lets me. Not that I want to give her any money to fund her bad habits, but they mean a lot and it hurts to see her do such a terrible thing just for extra cash. She may also try to charge ME more money than what's listed online simply because she knows I'll be desperate.

She's also the kind of person who, if you give her a clothing gift, she'll just try to sell it on Poshmark (fashion website for selling/buying used clothing) if she can't return it for store credit or cash. She did that with a pair of shoes her ex-boyfriend got her. Sold them online on Poshmark after telling him that she wanted them. (I think she picked an expensive pair just because she knew he would buy them and she could get a handsome sum of money for them.) They were dating at the time, too! Pretty disrespectful. I don't think he knew she did that, but she's a terrible person.

She also took some of my old clothes and sold them on Poshmark without me knowing. I wanted to donate them to GoodWill, but nope, I was in college at the time and I had no idea she was doing this. Neither did my parents. I think she made like $300 off all of them, when that $300 could've gone to someone in need... And of course, she didn't give me any of the money she made. So it's not like I could donate the money to a shelter or charity.

Anyway, sorry to hear about the situation with your friend. I'm glad you have no more drama, though. That sounds rough.

Originally Posted by AspiringAuthor

"You said you would never talk with me again, ever - what happened?!?!"

Yep, pretty much.

This isn't the first time she's said that, sadly. That's how I know she'll come crawling back.

Oh, and another thing... When my grandma died, we had to fly her body to Puerto Rico (from Boston-Logan airport) where she was born because that's where she would have wanted to be buried. Well, my parents couldn't afford much at the time because they had to buy plane tickets for all four of us, PLUS my uncle (who has no job, which is not his fault), PLUS my aunt (she has a job, but she's in debt right now). Then they had to pay for all the funeral stuff as well because his brother and sister couldn't afford to help. So, I decided I would help out by paying for 1 weeks worth of hotel rooms ($3000, mind you.) Well, my sister b_tched at me for "picking the worst hotel," even though it was the ONLY hotel that had vacancies, hence the exorbitant cost. (There were festivities going on at the time, so a bunch of vacationers bought up all the hotel rooms, which drove up the cost of everything.) Then she said, "You suck."

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

I’m sorry you are having issues with your sister. She sounds like a pain in the neck. You don’t need that kind of toxicity.

For a long time, I would have panic attacks around my sister because she is hostile, aggressive and verbally abusive. Our relationship was strained and I blocked her and had no communication with her for my peace of mind.

When I did let her back in my life...she started ranting and screaming one day and I walked out on her and told her I have no intention of ever being around that kind of behavior again. She sincerely apologized and has been on her best behavior since then. We get along much better now. I am firm on not putting up with her nonsense. I’ll just leave.

Can you limit exposure to your sister for some peace of mind?

Wow, sorry to hear that about your sister, but I'm glad you were finally able to improve your relationship. I hope one day my sister will stop being so emotionally abusive like that; your situation gives me hope. But I do think I have to limit my exposure as you said. I've been trying to do that for my own sake.

[AspiringAuthor]

Buy your late grandma's necklaces from your sis - you will be glad you did.

[BipolaRNurse]

I have an older sister who's a lot like yours. She is manipulative and undermines me at any chance she can get; fortunately my kids can see it for what it is and ignore her when she does it. She once trashed me on Facebook in what she "said" was a private message to her friend and swore she didn't know it would be seen by all our mutual friends, but I knew better and now I don't trust her as far as I can throw her.

I don't have as much contact with her as she would like, but it's the only way I can keep her at arm's length. She is such a negative person, she sucks the life right out of me; her constant drama drags me down and I just can't be around so much negativity without risking my mental health. She has made some incredibly poor life choices and she blames everybody but herself for them, she also thinks the world owes her something because she's had such a hard life. On top of that, she's always been lazy and she abused narcotics to the point where her kids ended up raising themselves, and now they have almost no contact with her for that reason.

The only reason I haven't cut her out of my life entirely is because she is old and very frail. She falls all the time and has COPD so bad she's on oxygen 24/7. I can't imagine she has very many years left in her, and I will be sad when she's gone. But she's pretty tough and will fight to the end, if for no other reason than to try to get back into my good graces. I hope it happens, but I doubt it.

I'm sorry to hear your sister is so unpleasant and difficult. I put my relationships with my sisters behind me years ago. One of them sounds a lot like your sister. I prefer to deal with the people i see in the present. The past is the past. It's better to chose positive, uplifting people to interact with.

I'm the youngest of 8. Of course there is dysfunction in my family. Lol. My mom died 11 yrs ago. I miss her every day. And my dad when I was 4.

My oldest sister I have the hardest time with. She abused my neice physically and mentally horribly. She will never admit to it. She's still mean to her. My other sisters except one have all said put it in the past, but I'm a be open about everything person and I have a hard time with that. My oldest sister is just plain toxic. She is opposite of me in every way even politically. I'm very liberal. She's a trump supporter. Ugh! I could go on and on about her, lol.

My other siblings I get along with pretty well. Of course none of them are perfect, but we get along pretty well.

Your sister sounds really superficial and attention seeking. That would get on my nerves too. Sorry you have to deal with that.

[Unrigged64072835]

I haven’t dealt with my family of origin at all. I don’t even know what my brother is doing and vice versa. I’m glad I left all that drama behind, though. He was a leech on my parents and he tried that with me, but I called him on it.