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Member Since Jan 2018
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Posts: 108
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#21
I was experiencing hypomania for weeks, turned manic and after a couple days I also got in a psychotic state of mind. I do remember more than I appreciate. (Most doctors were a bit surprised about that. For me not so much- it feels like different personalities- and during that manic episode I somehow got all the memories. Like the stable version got entangled with the unstable versions memories. It’s a long story )
Ended up in psych ward, against my will. Spent a week there, not talking to anyone (I refused) while I repaired myself in solitude. I didn’t do much- most things was in solitude, I went into hibernation. Of course- eventually it leaked into reality and no one was able to understand my rambling words and bits and pieces of the inner chaos materializing on the outside.
Possible trigger:
Are you aware you are having an episode? And when do you get so far you don’t see it anymore? If you are not having that severe experiences: do you feel guilty for not controling the illness even better? (I do, I know it’s not my fault. Still feel guilty) |
fern46, Sunflower123
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Mar 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 3,021
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#22
I was not aware I was having an episode. I thought I was just very productive and in sync with the universe for a few days and then one night it really spiraled out of control into pure psychosis. I was hallucinating and all kinds of bad things happened. I was violent and did all kinds of things that are completely insane and out of character. I repressed a lot of it. I dissociated a lot as well. The memories are still coming back to me in pieces.
I feel completely guilty that I didn't see it coming. I watched my mother experience psychosis once and I kick myself all the time for not recognizing it in myself. My husband tried to slow me down. He tried to get me to notice I was off and I brushed it aside. I had no idea this could happen to me. I had always been stable before and never experienced anything like it. The shame is overwhelming sometimes. I'm doing all I can to stay healthy and I have learned what my triggers are. I pray all the time that I will be able to see it coming and get help asap if it ever happens again. What is the most profound breakthrough you've had in therapy? |
Cornucopia, Sunflower123
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Cornucopia, Sunflower123
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Wise Elder
Member Since Apr 2015
Location: US
Posts: 9,232
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#23
Learning to forgive myself and not blame myself for having symptoms.
Have you lost a friend to bipolar? __________________ Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1700 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 1.5 mg clonazepam., 50 mg Seroquel |
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#24
Quote:
Q: What about your bipolar disorder has bothered or concerned other people most of all? Last edited by Anonymous46341; Jul 10, 2019 at 11:47 PM.. |
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#25
the fact I have it in the first place
seriously: I have met so many people who have shunned me just for having a diagnoses, which I think is so wrong. as for actual psymtoms: the moods. many people find it scary how I switch from being nice and friendly to a nightmare question: have you ever responded to negative stigma?. if so what did you say and what happened (as in, did that person learn about the illness.) |
Anonymous46341
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Member Since Jul 2019
Location: United States
Posts: 154
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#26
Quote:
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#27
Quote:
it probably explains why I don't have friends in the first place (that, and the fact I am the deffinition of boring) but we have each other at least. hugs |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Apr 2015
Location: US
Posts: 9,232
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#28
0
question: have you ever responded to negative stigma?. if so what did you say and what happened (as in, did that person learn about the illness.)[/QUOTE] The most notable was when there were really offensive jokes about psych patients being made at work and I finally told my boss that they were inappropriate and why I thought so. Suddenly my work was no longer good enough, I kept getting in trouble and I was fired a few months ltae. If I had kept my mouth shut I might still be in that job (Which I'm so glad I left as I eventually got to the job I was made to do and did that the last 18 months before disability. It was a good ending). Question: Were you/are you open about your diagnosis at work? __________________ Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1700 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 1.5 mg clonazepam., 50 mg Seroquel |
Anonymous32451
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#29
I don't work, but I'll answer in general: their was a time where I wasn't open about it at all (even saying the word bipolar freaked me out), but now I try to be more open.
basically I believe in the whole marolyn monroe aproach.. you take all of me or nothing at all when was your last big accomplishment?. what was it |
Wise Elder
Member Since Apr 2015
Location: US
Posts: 9,232
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#30
Dec. 9, 200. I graduated from my master's program and was eligible to take the exam to be an occupational therapist. I had a pretty good day in April 2001 too when I passed my exam...….
Are you an impatient person? In what circumstances? __________________ Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1700 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 1.5 mg clonazepam., 50 mg Seroquel |
Cornucopia
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#31
I thought I was (and I guess I still am), but i'm not as impatient as some others I know!. I know people who litirally won't take later for an answer. i will, but not for long
question: what was your happiest moment during childhood |
Member
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: Home
Posts: 108
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#32
When the library-bus came and I finally got some new books to read. The smell of paper, the joy inside, excited to start a new story. They came to life inside my mind. From I learnt to read until I was a teenager I read hundreds of books. Some years I read more than hundred books- by the time I was ten I had read all the books in our house. (And my mom liked to read, so it was a LOT)
(I also wanted to answer- I am open with it at work and I get help to minimize triggers and they are really supportive) What is your most funny bipolar-moment? Not something you are ashamed of, but something that was just funny in hindsight? (There are enough crappy episodes, sometimes I like the funny ones. I oncd told my boss to butt out- I was making a sand-castle- it was just still invisble and he was stepping on it He kinda said I didn’t make sense, but he let me do my thing. I was having a project, and I needed to put some more pieces together before showing the result. It did end well) |
Wild Coyote
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Wild Coyote
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#33
dressing up as a pirate
seriously, going around wearing a teddybear on my shoulder (to resemble a parrot), a sword, and a pirate costume I'd ordered on a manic spre from amazon then insisting people called me "davy jones" (in the pirate accent, or I wouldn't answer) question: have you ever believed that you have an illness that you've not oficially been diagnosed with, and if yes, what? |
Cornucopia
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Wise Elder
Member Since Apr 2015
Location: US
Posts: 9,232
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#34
A: I don't think so. I did go to the ER with pain I was afraid was my appendix once but the doctors didn't know either until I had a CT scan that showed it was something else.
Q: Will you shop at Prime days or similar with other companies? __________________ Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1700 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 1.5 mg clonazepam., 50 mg Seroquel |
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#35
not really.
I've done amazon prime day one year, though that wasn't because it was prime day, it was because I was mannic and just wanted to shop. would you ever go camping?, or do you like your home comforts |
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#36
Quote:
Q: Do you tend to let things roll off your back easily? Or not? |
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#37
no.
a lot of people have met their match when they meet me, because I'm very good for standing up for what I want, getting the apology I deserve, putting in the relevant complaints, what ever it takes question: what are you most looking forward to this summer? |
Wise Elder
Member Since Nov 2009
Location: NW US
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#38
It being over, lol. Summer is an endurance contest. I hate the heat and sun.
Which is your favorite season and why? __________________ ********* Mr. Robot Makes me sick to the heart, Oh I feel so tired. And the way the rain comes down hard, that's how I feel inside. --The Cure
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Jedi67
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Jedi67
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Mar 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 3,021
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#39
It used to be the fall, but I lost my mind last fall. It feels kinda dark and tainted now. I'm not looking forward to it anywhere near as much as I used to. I think spring will be my new favorite for at least a while. I love how the sun feels after the winter and the buzz in the air as everything comes back to life.
Would you rather sweat or shiver? Last edited by fern46; Jul 15, 2019 at 12:16 PM.. |
Innerzone, Jedi67
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Jedi67
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#40
Quote:
shiver. I hate the feeling of being hot, hate it I have 2 fans, 4 windows, and won't hesitate to use them if it gets too hot (well the fans at least, I need to be careful with the windows because of my alergic reaction to bees) question: when it comes to sself care what part (or what activity) is most important to you? (to me it is staying hydrated.) |
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