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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Portland
Posts: 12,681
(SuperPoster!)
5 40.2k hugs
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#761
Completely wiped out and exhausted. Slept all day yesterday, all night, got up at 4, then, immediately went back to bed because I could not stay awake. Maybe I am just getting caught up on the last several months of sleep deprivation. Maybe I am crashing a bit due to the recent addition and big doses of Dpeakote and Thorazine and so forth. I dunno.
Anyway, not judging myself. Wanted to ride this morning but just could not make it happen. I am going to do what I can do. Whatever that is. Hopefully, not as blue and sort of hopeless as yesterday was--it was fairly difficult. Sending euthymia and peace and love to all!!!! __________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
*Beth*, Anonymous41462, Anonymous45023, Anonymous46341, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Daonnachd, downandlonely, fern46, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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Sunflower123
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Magnate
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: Napa Valley
Posts: 2,116
18 3,379 hugs
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#762
bpcyclist, I second your sentiments. Hopefully not as blue.
Yesterday my in-laws came for lunch, bringing a bunch of food for us. I very much appreciate the gesture, but my MIL being fanatical about fresh food has given us more than we'll consume. I have no doubt that much of it will go bad before we can eat it. I have past experience to support this. So here I am grateful, yet frustrated. ... and feeling guilt over the frustration. My wife is doing psych research today with 4 groups, 3 study groups and the control group. So she's away for the first half of the day. I need to find an activity that doesn't involve throwing things out. On the other hand, getting rid of things could help toward the move. ... __________________ >< |
Anonymous41462, Anonymous45023, Anonymous46341, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, bpcyclist, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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bizi
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Guest
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#763
bpcyclist, I hope your mood evens out shortly. Long depressions after manias are not givens. Sometimes the pendulum swings a little the other way before settling in the right place.
Daonnachd, can you freeze some of the food? That's nice that your in-laws were so thoughtful. |
Anonymous41462, BeyondtheRainbow, bpcyclist, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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Guest
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#764
Hubby and I went to his barber downtown to get his hair cut. While hubby was getting his cut, a good friend and one of her friends happened to be downtown and spotted him. She's the friend that invited us for Chinese New year dinner. We really like her so much! She's a bundle of positivity and exhuberance.
Upon returning home, we saw that our new neighbors were home. I told hubby that we should stop procrastinating and introduce ourselves. Immediately! I actually made a batch of vanilla crescent cookies just for that purpose. I hope they like them. They're freaking good! We introduced ourselves and gave the lady the cookies and a bottle of wine. Her husband was visible, but didn't come to the door, but her little girl (maybe 4 years old) did, but was clearly shy. The lady seemed happy about our welcome and introduction. I'm almost certain they are Chinese, but I didn't speak any Chinese. I'm wondering if the husband perhaps speaks little English. We'll eventually find out. She didn't invite us in, but I didn't expect that and was even a bit relieved she didn't. I'm glad the first introduction is over with. Many people in the area I live now barely know their neighbors. That wasn't the case in my childhood hometown, in the same state. Things have changed over the years. We kind of followed my Czech husband's tradition of introduction. Last edited by Anonymous46341; Feb 02, 2020 at 02:01 PM.. |
Anonymous41462, Anonymous45023, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, bpcyclist, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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bizi
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Elder
Member Since Sep 2008
Location: Scotland, UK
Posts: 5,272
15 85 hugs
given |
#765
Had a great night last night celebrating my up coming Birthday but have felt really rubbish for roughly 24 hours. Sever neck, skull, head pain. Eyes are killing me. Feeling sick constantly. Have been having a lot of dizzy spells. Generally feeling quite pants. But maintained to enjoy myself last night and I did. I've slept about 4 hours and then slept 2 more in the afternoon as soon as I had lunch. I must peak too early. I felt better after my nap. Fast forward 3 hours and I'm gone. I'm shattered, sore, aching, feeling really icky and dizzy continuously. I hope the docs can sort me out. Seeing the nurse tomorrow to get a home monitoring BP machine. If this is all BP related then fine I can take meds for it. But if this is yo do with the lesion on my brain then I'm unsure what can be done
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*Beth*, Anonymous41462, Anonymous45023, Anonymous46341, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, bpcyclist, Daonnachd, Moose72, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
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5 23.7k hugs
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#766
Quote:
That sounds miserable. I truly hope you're feeling better very soon. It does sound like there could be BP symptoms going on. I had quite high BP, had no idea. Felt odd in my head, many heaches, extremely exhausted, just ill in general. I thought it was psych med side effects. Well, come to find my BP was quite high. I take Amlodipine for the BP and what do you know...all those odd, "sick" feelings went away.` __________________ |
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Anonymous46341, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, bpcyclist, Sunflower123
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bpcyclist, Miss Laura, Nammu
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
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5 23.7k hugs
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#767
Quote:
I grew up in a typical 1970's American suburban neighborhood. There was a group of ladies that were appointed by the neighborhood Association to be the "Welcoming Committee." They'd bring a basket of goodies and such to new neighbors. And, of course, pick up all the latest gossip... __________________ |
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Anonymous46341, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, bpcyclist, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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Magnate
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: Napa Valley
Posts: 2,116
18 3,379 hugs
given |
#768
Quote:
I'm getting rid of books. History books to my best friend who is also a history nerd like me. Science books to a friend who is a biology professor. Religion books to a friend who is purely very spiritual. Lit books will go to one of my former students who now teaches English in secondary school. PURGE! __________________ >< |
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Anonymous45023, Anonymous46341, BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, bpcyclist, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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Elder
Member Since Mar 2013
Location: NJ
Posts: 6,434
11 9,563 hugs
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#769
I am exhausted. I was up very late last night worrying. I even took klonopin and while it calmed my heart rate, it didn’t help me sleep. I was worrying about my debt, how I could make money, etc. it was terrible. I think I finally fell asleep around 2am. At least I got to sleep in today.
My kitty is home from the hospital. He’s still straining to urinate but he’s alert. I hope it’ll go away. I don’t want to have to put him down. I see my pdoc on Tuesday. I’m not going to tell her I already stopped the haldol; rather I’m going to “ask” her if I can try stopping it because of the jaw twitches. I have not had any twitches since I stopped the haldol. And I have not any psychotic symptoms, which makes sense because I only get psychotic in mood episodes and I haven’t had an episode since September. Secretly, I am considering weaning off of depakote as well to see if I can manage on lamictal alone. I primarily suffer from depression, and I don’t really do anything dangerous when hypomania except maybe shop a bit more. Which I won’t do, considering how little I make. The depakote didn’t do much to prevent the hypomania episode I had two years ago, either. So I want to see if I can manage on just one med. I know I can’t manage on no meds. I’ve tried that many times and it has been disastrous. But maybe, just maybe, I can do with one. Don’t call me stupid, please. __________________ Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
Anonymous45023, Anonymous46341, bizi, bpcyclist, Daonnachd, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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bizi
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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#770
Quote:
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BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, Daonnachd, Sunflower123
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bizi, Daonnachd
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Magnate
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: Napa Valley
Posts: 2,116
18 3,379 hugs
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#771
Quote:
__________________ >< |
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BeyondtheRainbow, bizi, bpcyclist, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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bizi
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Portland
Posts: 12,681
(SuperPoster!)
5 40.2k hugs
given |
#772
Quote:
So, please tell her the entire story. They will take care of you. I am certain of it. Sending you pain and nausea releif and comfort and peace. __________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
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BeyondtheRainbow, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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Miss Laura
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Portland
Posts: 12,681
(SuperPoster!)
5 40.2k hugs
given |
#773
Quote:
__________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
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Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Portland
Posts: 12,681
(SuperPoster!)
5 40.2k hugs
given |
#774
Quote:
__________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
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BeyondtheRainbow, Daonnachd, Sunflower123
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Daonnachd
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Portland
Posts: 12,681
(SuperPoster!)
5 40.2k hugs
given |
#775
Quote:
__________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
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Anonymous41462, BeyondtheRainbow, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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BeyondtheRainbow, Moose72, wildflowerchild25
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Elder
Member Since Sep 2008
Location: Scotland, UK
Posts: 5,272
15 85 hugs
given |
#776
Quote:
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Anonymous41462, Anonymous45023, Anonymous46341, BeyondtheRainbow, bpcyclist, Daonnachd, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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bpcyclist
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Guest
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#777
I know this doesn't mean much, but it pisses me off. Some jackass at my company sent an email to a bunch of people thanking my former boss for being "inspirational." This douchebag of a boss promised me a promotion and a raise, but gave me neither of them after I complained about one of his favorite employees he managed. He also took money off of my bonus for every minute I was late to a meeting. For example, if I had a conference call at 10am and I showed up at 10:01am, he'd take $100 off my bonus. It didn't matter if my phone or my computer wasn't working; I still got money taken off my bonus. And the amount of bonus money was eligible for was not that much in the first place. Then he treated me like dogshit by giving me projects he knew I couldn't do. It was no coincidence, as all of this happened after I complained.
I don't know how/why my boss still works for my company. I thought he was fired. Or maybe he was just scolded. I don't know. My current boss vouched for me and reported him. (This was like 3 years ago, though.) But I pretty much lost $700 off my bonus because I showed up for a meeting 7 mins late. I was taking care of my grandma who had dementia and needed help going to the bathroom. But no, he didn't care. He's a f**ing sack of s***. |
Anonymous45023, Anonymous46341, BeyondtheRainbow, bpcyclist, Fuzzybear, giddykitty, Moose72, Nammu, Sunflower123, Unrigged64072835
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Portland
Posts: 12,681
(SuperPoster!)
5 40.2k hugs
given |
#778
In my experience, when people like this douchebag continue to get promoted, it is almost always as a result of being tight with someone in a more lofty position with serious authority and power. Someone has his back. That's the problem, usually.
__________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
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Fuzzybear
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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 73,351
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14 55.9k hugs
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#779
Whenever I hear about horrible bosses I think of Frank burns on MASH, he went totally off the rails but got promoted. Seems like there's a frank burns in every company.
__________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
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Silver Swan
Member Since Jan 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 16,845
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16 2,621 hugs
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#780
Amazon says my new (used) book won't be arriving until the latest date they quoted- the 14th. Maybe it will come earlier anyway.
Laying in bed listening to a different CD. Its relaxing. Speaking of relaxing Im at the end of "Manic". Too bad- I was wanting to start "Electro Boy" right after. Wednesday, I have a check up with my liver dr. He's going to scold me for not being thin. And why is there a 7 pound discrepancy between drs scales and my home scale? Stupid home scale. Of course they weigh me in my coat and steel-toed boots... Waiting for N3 to get home but I bet it wont be until 9ish. Went to lunch with my friend today. No exciting conversation. Feel its a waste of money if I don't have a good time. I'm in my pajamas waiting to switch over the laundry. My best friend went to key west Wednesday. Should be back sometime today as he works tomorrow. __________________ Ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 1.5 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) |
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