Today

HALLIEBETH87 · Mar 10, 2020, 01:07 PM

I had php again today and cried all day-again.

My social worker there at the hospital asked to call my t. I’m having thoughts of hurting myself again. I can’t stop crying.

Yaowen · Mar 10, 2020, 01:49 PM

I am so very, very sorry you are suffering ! ! ! Wish I knew what to say that would help. I hope things get better for you and soon!

Wild Coyote · Mar 10, 2020, 01:50 PM

I hope you feel better very soon, Halliebeth,

Mar 10, 2020, 02:53 PM

Sending you hugs and good vibes, HALLIEBETH! Tomorrow is another day.

Fuzzybear · Mar 10, 2020, 03:00 PM

Hugs and respect to all

~Christina · Mar 10, 2020, 05:22 PM

Im sorry that things arent getting better... Seeing Matt is really going to help you decide if you need a bit more IP time and then get back to PHP .. You need to allow your providers to make your decisions right now

Trust there judgment, Please

HALLIEBETH87 · Mar 10, 2020, 07:20 PM

I packed a bag to stay a couple days with my aunt in a city nearby which is also where my php/ip is.

My granny was like “are you going back?!” I feel defeated. My cousin said maybe I shouldn’t go there for any treatment anymore because maybe medication won’t help me. She said maybe I just need more therapy.

Idk what to do. I’ll see my therapist tomorrow. I go back to php Thursday.

Mar 11, 2020, 07:26 AM

Sorry to hear that medication isn't helping you. Or, maybe you haven't found the right cocktail yet? Sometimes it takes a while to find the right cocktail.

Also, have you asked about spravato? Here's the website: Nasal Spray Treatment for Treatment-Resistant Depression (TRD)

It's for treatment resistant depression, and lots of people here have said good things about it. It can be expensive, though. *BUT* your pdoc can write an appeal to your insurance company stating that you have tried a multitude of medications for treating depression (as well as ECT), and that they didn't work or weren't very effective. I had to do that with Rexulti and my insurance started covering it when they refused to before.

Therapy can certainly help, though. It's always good to pick up coping mechanisms from your therapist.

HALLIEBETH87 · Mar 11, 2020, 10:56 AM

I’m
Here for t. Feeling nervous today

MickeyCheeky · Mar 11, 2020, 11:10 AM

We are ALL Wishing you good luck, @HALLIEBETH87! Remember that you're stronger than you think. I'll keep you and ALL of your Loved Ones in my Thoughts and Prayers. Please keep trying your best. We are ALL rooting for you! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @HALLIEBETH87, your Family, your Friends, your Therapists, your Social Workers, your GrandMother, your Aunt, your Parents, your Cousin, your Parents and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK, MY DEAR, SWEET, KIND, AWESOME AND WONDERFUL FRIEND?!

HALLIEBETH87 · Mar 11, 2020, 12:43 PM

Well.

He threatened to do an MIW or call an ambulance if I
Didn’t drive straight to ip from
His office today.

He was very firm with me. It scared me. He’s never been like that. To his defense I was being very willful.

I’m still NOT happy

Moose72 · Mar 11, 2020, 01:25 PM

Sounds like you're going IP again. He thinks its serious enough to be firm with you to get through to you the seriousness of going IP. I had that happen to me back with an old pdoc. Get back to us when you can!