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OliverB
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Trig May 31, 2020 at 10:04 AM
  #1
It is the wonderful again, the thoughts of self performing an autopsy seem so nice. I wont do It.

Though I do not get why I feel like hurting myself while feeling wonderful.

Does It happen to any of you?

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CPTSD and some sort of depression and weird perceptions

"Outwardly: dumbly, I shamble about, a thing that could never have been known as human, a
thing whose shape is so alien a travesty that humanity becomes more obscene for the vague resemblance."
I have no mouth and I must scream -Harlan Ellison-
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Default May 31, 2020 at 10:25 AM
  #2
Hi OliverB. I do not have a history of more classic deliberate self harm or self harm ideations. The only form I have experienced was slapping my own face/head or punching walls with my hands/arms/head, but that was only during my very worst episodes, and I have a feeling that it was not done with exactly the same intention that people who cut (or similar) have. Honestly, I don't know. In any case, I did notice that only yesterday you posted a thread expressing clearly depression-type symptoms. Now you reference elation, and yet still express a desire to self harm. I can't help but wonder if you are experiencing some mixed state. I do know that during mixed states, lots of odd and scary stuff is possible. I hope you will contact your psychiatrist/therapist, as soon as possible, to share about these mood fluctuations, and of course your self harm urges/fantasies.

I know that there are members here who have issues with SH. I hope you hear from them, as well.

Please stay safe!
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OliverB
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Default May 31, 2020 at 10:35 AM
  #3
I am seeing my T on Tuesday.

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Crazy, inside and aside

Meds: bye bye meds
CPTSD and some sort of depression and weird perceptions

"Outwardly: dumbly, I shamble about, a thing that could never have been known as human, a
thing whose shape is so alien a travesty that humanity becomes more obscene for the vague resemblance."
I have no mouth and I must scream -Harlan Ellison-
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scatterbrained04
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Default May 31, 2020 at 11:08 AM
  #4
I just went through about a 2-3 week period well I felt pretty good but hypersexual and wanted to SH. It was really weird.
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