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#1
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The title says it. There's a colonoscopy Tuesday and reattachment surgery Wednesday. I did the covid-19 swab yesterday. This is great news for me!
However... My anxiety is ramping up still and already is very high. I've tried everything I have that I can take and all I know I can do. I don't want to call or message with friends because I don't want them to know how freaked out I am. I'm worried without and above reason. It's so bad that my stomach hurts very badly. My headache is excruciating. I can only take Tylenol right now but it doesn't work, I tried three times. I'm not sleeping for two nights. I'm staying awake doing nothing until four or five then playing videogames. That does take my mind off things but only slightly. My neck hurts very badly too, because I had to stop taking my pain management supplement. I tried talking both benedryl and valerian root last night for sleep. Nothing. Took three times throughout the night and still awake. I'm shaky and tearful and worried. I am at least a little more positive knowing I can't have a bunch of visitors at the hospital. That makes me way worse with too many people around but nobody understands why that would be. |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous45023, Anonymous46341, bshaffer836, Sunflower123, unaluna, wildflowerchild25
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#2
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Here are some well-wishes for your colonoscopy and reattachment surgery! And I hope the prep goes down alright for the colonoscopy. Glad you're happy that you can't have a bunch of visitors.
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__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
#3
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I'm excited for you and wishing you all the best. I hope you're able to relax prior to the surgery. Looking forward to an update.
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#4
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Managed to sleep about two hours. Anxiety is still very high. I think I can sleep more now
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#5
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Here's to a good night's rest!
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
#6
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Yet I didn't sleep any more. I've gotten about 10 hours in a week. I'm an emotional wreck and I don't know what to do. I have so much to get ready but I can't get out of bed. Sometimes I feel better for ten minutes but then I'm right back in bed again for hours. Even though I know it's only a few more days, it feels like forever. I'm unsteady even when walking around my little apartment from lack of sleep. I'm awake worrying and being depressed. I'm scared thoroughly about this
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![]() *Beth*, wildflowerchild25
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#7
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Quote:
At the hospital, pretty soon before you are taken back to the operating room, they will give you a white liquid in your IV. This is the "I-don't-care" med. This makes it so you don't jump up and run away in fear. It really works. I remember having it and I just thought, "They're going to cut my middle open... Oh well."
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
![]() *Beth*
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#8
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Quote:
I remember the propofol going in and thinking how strangely it suddenly tasted then they told me to count down from ten. I don't remember anything until I woke up. They could have cut me wide open and I'd never know it. Oh wait, they did! And I didn't know it... Until I woke up. (Made little joke there, didn't I?) I got some sleep earlier, but 3pm to 9 isn't ideal. I'm going to try to fall back asleep and I've set many alarms to get things done in the morning before the wonderful journey of prep begins. I've had my last solid food until at least Thursday. |
#9
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Yes that prep is a journey! Good way to put it. I do that too- set many alarms a few minutes apart so I can't fall back asleep. Im having a sigmoidoscopy. The prep consists of two enemas but I have to go clear liquids for a while. I also have to skip my metformin and my blood thinner for a while. They have to still call me and tell me when to hold the Eloquis.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
#10
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#11
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__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
#12
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#13
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Did you get the lemon flavor or the cherry for your gallon+ of gross drink? Where I am, they want you to drink half before bed and half so many hours before you leave for the procedure unit.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
#14
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#15
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Thoughts and prayers Sorry Shaped. That prep sounds better tasting than the gallon one. The gallon one was manageable but not great when I did it in October. i hope it all goes well.
__________________
Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1600 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 2.5 mg clonazepam., 75 mg Seroquel and 12.5 mg PRNx2 daily |
#16
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I got weak at one point and slept in the floor. I don't know if I fell down or passed out or lay myself down. I remember being very tired and dizzy. There's no bruises. But I woke up around 11:30 and had a glass of water. I feel better now. I'm supposed to be at the hospital, waiting in the surgery center parking lot to be called in at 6:45. That's how they're doing it now. That's how it was with the swab. At least I don't feel hungry. Physically exhausted. Mentally empty. Anxiety isn't as high as it was but it's still up there. My intestines hurt now. My pain levels from not having kratom in days is very high again, as to be expected. I want someone to snuggle but that's not an option with quarantine. I want to hold and be held and to be told it's going to be better soon. |
![]() unaluna
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#17
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Colonoscopy over and done. Tomorrow's the real work
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#18
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Glad you made it through the colonoscopy!
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
#19
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Reversal was done yesterday. I'm whole again! Surgeon tried 3 hours to do it laproscopic but had to open me up and that took about two more hours. I'm staying in the hospital for several days and pain is almost unbearable at times but we have got a combination of drugs helping with that some. I did have an allergic reaction to the antibiotics the gave me in OR but only skin reactions. I've been sleeping a little on and off but I wanted you good people to know I'm doing better
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![]() BeyondtheRainbow, unaluna, wildflowerchild25
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![]() unaluna, wildflowerchild25
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#20
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I'm so glad it is over and that you are healing. I hope they figure out the pain meds thing.
__________________
Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1600 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 2.5 mg clonazepam., 75 mg Seroquel and 12.5 mg PRNx2 daily |
#21
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Yay for being whole again! I hope those pain meds do the trick. And I'm glad youre getting rest. You went through TWO surgeries!
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
#22
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I walked earlier. I felt like I'd run a marathon when it was over, but I did walk
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![]() unaluna
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![]() *Beth*
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#23
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Great! Prevent those blood clots!
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
![]() *Beth*
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#24
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#25
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How are you doing now? Thinking of you often
__________________
Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1600 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 2.5 mg clonazepam., 75 mg Seroquel and 12.5 mg PRNx2 daily |
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