[FluffyDinosaur]

This is something I struggle with a lot when I'm this sick and can't accomplish much. People will tell you to look at your past achievements and look at what you have and be proud of that. I've done plenty of things in the past that I was proud of at the time, but right now they just underscore how useless I am and only serve to amplify the self-hatred. I feel like a completely different person than I was when I did those things, someone who is nothing in comparison. On paper I have my life together pretty well, but it doesn't mean anything when I'm unable to do the things I really want and pursue my goals and ambitions the way I want.

[bpcyclist]

I accomplihsed much more in an hour when I was well than I do in a week now. It is very unfair to me for me to compare my unhealthy self's achievements with those of my healthy self. Very, very unfair. So, I don't do it. That was an entirely different, other person.

[Sometimes psychotic]

I don’t necessarily judge myself by what I’ve accomplished so much as who I am. One thing I do is try to help others in whatever way I can. That’s one of the main reasons I stayed on Pc so long. It may be a tiny step or it might change someone’s life or it might not resonate at all, but in all these situations I’ve tried to help and for me the attempt to do good is as important as the outcome.

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

I don’t necessarily judge myself by what I’ve accomplished so much as who I am. One thing I do is try to help others in whatever way I can. That’s one of the main reasons I stayed on Pc so long. It may be a tiny step or it might change someone’s life or it might not resonate at all, but in all these situations I’ve tried to help and for me the attempt to do good is as important as the outcome.

This is how I look at it, too. I think it's the healthiest way. We are not just a resume/CV in life.

I did achieve a lot in my youth, and had plenty of cool adventures, but in my view, my journey and accomplishments these past 10 years have been even more impressive. Recovery, survival of a figurative war, extreme patience and tolerance, increased grounding and mindfulness, caring for others, deeper expressiveness, and much more. All the greatest these past 10 years, much of which was on disability! These have been the hardest years of my life and I am here, alive. Anyone that discounts these years has ZERO idea!

[swimmingly]

I'm struggling with this one now that I've shifted moods. Interesting read.

[*Beth*]

My go-to measurement of self-worth is that I have raised two children who are doing very well with their lives and are giving good to our world. I broke the cycle of the mess I grew up with, I really broke it, and succeeded at being the parent I wish I would have had. That took hard work.

Also, although my husband and I live separately, we are the dearest of friends, and our best support people. We've been married for 32 years and that's taken a tremendous amount of work. I call it a success, given that we both live with mental illness.

Also, that I've survived the agony of empty nest and come through the other side...I never thought I'd really do that! But I'm handling it much better every year.

[sarahsweets]

I dont believe you can measure your self worth. By what ruler? Who determines what good self worth is?

[FluffyDinosaur]

Thanks for the replies, everyone.

I definitely agree that it's unfair to compare yourself when ill to how you are when well, but I still find it very difficult not to do that.

Looking at the way you've helped others and the steps you've taken to overcome/manage bipolar symptoms are definitely helpful ways to get some perspective, although I don't know how far I can personally get with that approach as I'm not a very social person and I don't really interact much with others. I do enjoy helping people when I have the chance.


One interaction I do have is with my kids, and I definitely think raising them better than you yourself were raised is something to be proud of. For me that's still a work in progress because my kids are still young.

I suppose what I personally care about most is making things that I consider beautiful, which in my case amounts mostly to writing and the products of my research. For some reason I really need to create something tangible that will last. I find it very hard to take satisfaction in ephemeral things, so I get really frustrated when I can't produce much. I guess that's just a shortcoming I have.

I don't think there's any objective way to measure self-worth, but I am curious about the things that make people feel good about themselves even when life isn't going that great at the moment.