[wolftrap]

I was going to post this in the personality disorder forum, but it looks like no one has been there for a while.

My therapist and I have been trying to figure out my specific disorder. We are positing that it is dependent personality disorder, of which I share many traits.


Does anyone have experience with this? I would very much like to hear what anyone has to say.

[*Beth*]

I don't think I have any direct experience with it, but I've read quite a bit about DPD. I'm pretty sure that one of my sisters had it. DPD sounds like a painful disorder to have.

[wolftrap]

Yes, I've spent many years of my life subsuming myself into someone else's life. You can ask yourself...what if?...but that's pointless. I'm trying to make a life for myself that is my own. This is difficult as I must rely on SSDI and my parents for financial...well, money to live. Given that dependence, I'm working on being independent in the rest of my life. Relationships have always been dangerous for me because I would completely rely on another to define myself. The parting words of my last girlfriend were "I can't take care of you." I replied "I didn't ask you to!" But, she saw my dependence. So, no relationships for over a decade. Perhaps one will be possible in a while...

[Soupe du jour]

Hi wolftrap. I'm sorry that you have a potential additional mental health issue to work through. Like BethRags, I do not have such a disorder. I have not heard that it is common in people with bipolar disorder, but maybe I just don't know about that. In any case, most of us have secondary psych issues of some sort. I know that generalized anxiety has been an issue for me, off and on.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by wolftrap

Yes, I've spent many years of my life subsuming myself into someone else's life. You can ask yourself...what if?...but that's pointless. I'm trying to make a life for myself that is my own. This is difficult as I must rely on SSDI and my parents for financial...well, money to live. Given that dependence, I'm working on being independent in the rest of my life. Relationships have always been dangerous for me because I would completely rely on another to define myself. The parting words of my last girlfriend were "I can't take care of you." I replied "I didn't ask you to!" But, she saw my dependence. So, no relationships for over a decade. Perhaps one will be possible in a while...

I fully understand the financial dependence. I've been married for over 30 years, was almost entirely an at-home mom, and I'm still financially dependent on my husband, aside from a small amount of SSDI. I also do my best to find my independence in other ways.

[wolftrap]

Thank you both. I'm just coming to grips with this. The signs were there, but no one could put a label on it, a way to define it. Anyway, I am grateful to have people to share this with. Thank you.