Bipolar Check-In Thread #53

*Beth* · Dec 07, 2020 at 01:57 PM

#52 was at page 100, so here's our new check-in thread!

Nammu · Dec 07, 2020 at 02:05 PM

Thanks Beth!

*Beth* · Dec 07, 2020 at 02:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nammu

Thanks Beth!

You're most welcome! I was the last person at 100 pages twice . We go through 100 pages in nothing flat!

Mountaindewed · Dec 07, 2020 at 02:52 PM

This is the fastest my mood has ever dipped from a shot. And I feel bad physically now. I’m just lying in bed really depressed. I felt fine Saturday afternoon- early this morning. And then a few hours after the shot and I am totally down, and anxious about the out patient program unlike before when I was really upbeat about it. and I’m just lying in bed. This transition is really doing a number on me but I’m glad I’m doing it. I just wish I knew why it’s been so bad lately.

Bipolarchic14 · Dec 07, 2020 at 03:34 PM

What kind of shot Mountaindewed and have you tried this years Christmas Mountain Dew?

Mountaindewed · Dec 07, 2020 at 03:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bipolarchic14

What kind of shot Mountaindewed and have you tried this years Christmas Mountain Dew?

It’s a testosterone shot. I’m fTm.

I have tried the Christmas Mountain Dew. Do you like it? I’m looking forward to the watermelon flavor coming next month.

Bipolarchic14 · Dec 07, 2020 at 03:52 PM

It was ok I can take it or leave it.

Moose72 · Dec 07, 2020 at 05:03 PM

Watching "The Feed" on Amazon Prime. I just brought my clean laundry up from the laundry room. Time to fold and put away! I did my sheets too. Those will be fresh for tonight. I had a lot of dreams since I slept in. In one, I was with my ex husband and he bought a new car and it was very nice. We went for a ride in it and it could drive on top of the water! In another dream, I was at my grandparents' house that they built back in the 70's. (They've since moved out and both have died a number of years back, now.) Anyway I was at that house and there was a pool indoors. Nice room for the pool, too. Square. Nice stone floor. Plants. I wanted to get in, but couldn't find my suit. (In reality I don't have one.) I got in the fridge and stole someone's half of a sub from Subway. It's going to be dark here in about half an hour. I can see the sunset over the top of the apartment building across the parking lot here. I sent my judo sensei, whom I chat with sometimes on facebook messenger, a picture of bones on a plate with barbeque sauce squirted on the plate and a santa hat- with a note : "Thanks for the elf. It was delicious!" I thought this was funny. My judo sensei said it was creepy. I guess I'm creepy then. He said, "I know its not a real elf, but it's still creepy". I said "It's just bones on a plate with barbeque sauce". Oh well. I thought it was amusing.

Speaking of sugar and being hungry,, now it's been 3 hours since I ate last and I want to make a hamburger for dinner. I guess I'll wait. I feel like I'm gaining weight. Haven't confirmed this with the scale, though.

Sunflower123 · Dec 07, 2020 at 05:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Moose72

Watching "The Feed" on Amazon Prime. I just brought my clean laundry up from the laundry room. Time to fold and put away! I did my sheets too. Those will be fresh for tonight. I had a lot of dreams since I slept in. In one, I was with my ex husband and he bought a new car and it was very nice. We went for a ride in it and it could drive on top of the water! In another dream, I was at my grandparents' house that they built back in the 70's. (They've since moved out and both have died a number of years back, now.) Anyway I was at that house and there was a pool indoors. Nice room for the pool, too. Square. Nice stone floor. Plants. I wanted to get in, but couldn't find my suit. (In reality I don't have one.) I got in the fridge and stole someone's half of a sub from Subway. It's going to be dark here in about half an hour. I can see the sunset over the top of the apartment building across the parking lot here. I sent my judo sensei, whom I chat with sometimes on facebook messenger, a picture of bones on a plate with barbeque sauce squirted on the plate and a santa hat- with a note : "Thanks for the elf. It was delicious!" I thought this was funny. My judo sensei said it was creepy. I guess I'm creepy then. He said, "I know its not a real elf, but it's still creepy". I said "It's just bones on a plate with barbeque sauce". Oh well. I thought it was amusing.

Speaking of sugar and being hungry,, now it's been 3 hours since I ate last and I want to make a hamburger for dinner. I guess I'll wait. I feel like I'm gaining weight. Haven't confirmed this with the scale, though.

I’ve got Amazon Prime but haven’t watched anything. Do you watch it on your phone, computer or television? I hear there are some good things on Prime.

*Beth* · Dec 07, 2020 at 05:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Moose72

Watching "The Feed" on Amazon Prime. I just brought my clean laundry up from the laundry room. Time to fold and put away! I did my sheets too. Those will be fresh for tonight. I had a lot of dreams since I slept in. In one, I was with my ex husband and he bought a new car and it was very nice. We went for a ride in it and it could drive on top of the water! In another dream, I was at my grandparents' house that they built back in the 70's. (They've since moved out and both have died a number of years back, now.) Anyway I was at that house and there was a pool indoors. Nice room for the pool, too. Square. Nice stone floor. Plants. I wanted to get in, but couldn't find my suit. (In reality I don't have one.) I got in the fridge and stole someone's half of a sub from Subway. It's going to be dark here in about half an hour. I can see the sunset over the top of the apartment building across the parking lot here. I sent my judo sensei, whom I chat with sometimes on facebook messenger, a picture of bones on a plate with barbeque sauce squirted on the plate and a santa hat- with a note : "Thanks for the elf. It was delicious!" I thought this was funny. My judo sensei said it was creepy. I guess I'm creepy then. He said, "I know its not a real elf, but it's still creepy". I said "It's just bones on a plate with barbeque sauce". Oh well. I thought it was amusing.

Speaking of sugar and being hungry,, now it's been 3 hours since I ate last and I want to make a hamburger for dinner. I guess I'll wait. I feel like I'm gaining weight. Haven't confirmed this with the scale, though.

I think it's funny

Moose72 · Dec 07, 2020 at 06:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BethRags

I think it's funny

Here you go. This is the picture.

*Beth* · Dec 07, 2020 at 08:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Moose72

Here you go. This is the picture.

That's clever and funny

Moose72 · Dec 07, 2020 at 09:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BethRags

That's clever and funny

Thanks for this. Otherwise, my friends are making me out to be some sort of creepy weirdo!

Nammu · Dec 07, 2020 at 05:37 PM

Is prime closed captioned? I got notice it was a free service but I don’t want to mess around with it and find out I can’t watch it anyway

Moose72 · Dec 07, 2020 at 05:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nammu

Is prime closed captioned? I got notice it was a free service but I don’t want to mess around with it and find out I can’t watch it anyway

Y.es, it is. At least in my settings, it plays automatically

MuddyBoots · Dec 08, 2020 at 02:20 PM

I started reviewing math stuff I’ve already taken classes for in attempts to get back in school for meteorology or chemistry or maybe engineering (or physics or math or x,y,z, or this or that). Something math intensive though. I feel like if I hadn’t been taking calc II with a crap professor while manic, psychotic, doing ECT, and being hospitalized every other month, I could’ve kept going instead of flunking and not wanting to spend another grand to retake the courses I was in.

I feel like I have so much wasted potential. I’m so far behind everyone else my age. I’m stuck in a cycle of self destruction and defeat that I don’t know how to get out of.

*Beth* · Dec 08, 2020 at 04:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sapien

I started reviewing math stuff I’ve already taken classes for in attempts to get back in school for meteorology or chemistry or maybe engineering (or physics or math or x,y,z, or this or that). Something math intensive though. I feel like if I hadn’t been taking calc II with a crap professor while manic, psychotic, doing ECT, and being hospitalized every other month, I could’ve kept going instead of flunking and not wanting to spend another grand to retake the courses I was in.

I feel like I have so much wasted potential. I’m so far behind everyone else my age. I’m stuck in a cycle of self destruction and defeat that I don’t know how to get out of.

Never feel that you're behind "everyone else"! I know so many people who believe that. It's our weary minds giving us false information. You have an illness and you work SO hard to cope with it. Suspend judgment, Sapien and give yourself the love you deserve.

MuddyBoots · Dec 08, 2020 at 06:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BethRags

Never feel that you're behind "everyone else"! I know so many people who believe that. It's our weary minds giving us false information. You have an illness and you work SO hard to cope with it. Suspend judgment, Sapien and give yourself the love you deserve.

You’re right. It just sucks that other people are able to function and their successes are getting degrees, landing jobs/getting promoted, and getting married and my successes are “I haven’t done anything that has a high probability of killing me in a week and I remembered to eat a meal today.”

Guess I just gotta remember I have disorder(s) that make my little successes matter as much as others’.

*Beth* · Dec 08, 2020 at 07:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sapien

You’re right. It just sucks that other people are able to function and their successes are getting degrees, landing jobs/getting promoted, and getting married and my successes are “I haven’t done anything that has a high probability of killing me in a week and I remembered to eat a meal today.”

Guess I just gotta remember I have disorder(s) that make my little successes matter as much as others’.

I know. I'm there, too. All of the friends I grew up with have "normal" lives. My life is not normal, it's weird. If nothing else, meds cause life to be abnormal. I have a bunch of childhood friends who regularly run marathons. If I walk around the block it's a success, because meds make me feel so off-balance and tired.

All those reasons make it so, so important to have 24/7 support. We really need it.

MuddyBoots · Dec 16, 2020 at 07:37 AM

I’m supposed to be on the interstate right now headed for the big mountains but my car is a useless POS so I am stuck at home. Probably gonna do something I will regret within the hour.

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Bipolar Check-In Thread #53

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Beth catches the flowers Member Since Jul 2019 Location: Downtown Vibes, California Posts: 15,701 (SuperPoster!) 4 23.7k hugs given	Dec 07, 2020 at 01:57 PM #1 #52 was at page 100, so here's our new check-in thread! __________________

Nammu Crone Member Since May 2010 Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system. Posts: 71,869 (SuperPoster!) 14 54k hugs given	Dec 07, 2020 at 02:05 PM #2 Thanks Beth! __________________ *Nammu* …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann

Bipolarchic14 Poohbah Member Since Feb 2014 Location: Over there Posts: 1,076 10 354 hugs given	Dec 07, 2020 at 03:34 PM #5 What kind of shot Mountaindewed and have you tried this years Christmas Mountain Dew?

Bipolarchic14 Poohbah Member Since Feb 2014 Location: Over there Posts: 1,076 10 354 hugs given	Dec 07, 2020 at 03:52 PM #7 It was ok I can take it or leave it.

Nammu Crone Member Since May 2010 Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system. Posts: 71,869 (SuperPoster!) 14 54k hugs given	Dec 07, 2020 at 05:37 PM #14 Is prime closed captioned? I got notice it was a free service but I don’t want to mess around with it and find out I can’t watch it anyway __________________ *Nammu* …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann

MuddyBoots Monster on the Hill Member Since Sep 2020 Location: by the river Posts: 4,536 (SuperPoster!) 3 5,066 hugs given	Dec 16, 2020 at 07:37 AM #20 I’m supposed to be on the interstate right now headed for the big mountains but my car is a useless POS so I am stuck at home. Probably gonna do something I will regret within the hour. __________________ Live life for nothing but that sweet sweet melody.