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#1
Dec 10, 2020, 08:42 PM
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A post here about being hyper sexual. It reminded me of someone I had kissed at a party when I was 19. I spoke to him again and he said he was ''disgusted'' with himself. He said it in a horrible way. I had previously been the girlfriend of one of his friends. I did have a few boyfriends at that age. I do not think I was ''promiscuous'' ... neither do I think that is a ''crime'', especially for someone with bipolar and/or from an abusive, neglectful family.
I do not know what is ''wrong'' with me that I remember every vile thing ever said to me. Its not that I don't try to forget these ugly words and actions. I do. I keep trying to forget them. I was also nearly raped on a train when I was 16. I was completely innocent at that age. I knew nothing at all about sex. My father came to the station with my mother ... when I eventually managed to get off the train (my friend had managed to get off earlier and contacted them) I guess I should be grateful they did not turn me out onto the streets permanently at 16... My father stood there and shouted at me ''you led him on''  He was not ''pure''... he had had many affairs and married someone else......(my mother was devastated but was never angry with him. She was only ever angry with me. (her only cub) My mother just stood there. She never defended me. Not once. I now find sex... traumatic I feel disgusting ETA  Ugh. I think I need to put my muzzle on again I feel ''disgusting'' even posting. Maybe I am ''disgusting''
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Last edited by Fuzzybear; Dec 10, 2020 at 09:22 PM. |
 *Beth*, bizi, Daonnachd
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 *Beth*, bizi, Bugtussel, Miss Laura
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#2
Dec 10, 2020, 09:26 PM
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you're beautiful.
YOur husband loves you and you are loved by many here. just to hear about the abuse you put up with. I am sorry it comes back to you to relive..... you are not disgusting. bizi
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lamictal 2x a day haldol 2x a day cogentin 2x a day klonipin , 1mg at night, fish oil coq10 multi vit,, vit c, at noon, tumeric, caffeine Remeron at night, zyprexa, requip2-4mg |
| Fuzzybear
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| Fuzzybear
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#3
Dec 10, 2020, 09:35 PM
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Quote:
 
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| bizi
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#4
Dec 11, 2020, 10:45 AM
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Fuzzybear, I suspect you speak for many with what you've said here. Without knowing you have established a very deep connection.
You are not disgusting. We cherish you here.
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| bizi, Fuzzybear
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| *Beth*, Fuzzybear
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#5
Dec 11, 2020, 11:14 AM
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It makes me sick, what parents can do to profoundly damage their child. I know what it's like to have parents who don't protect you...it is the worst action a parent can take. I'm so sorry you had to have that experience, Fuzzybear. Please know that in THIS part of the woods you are deeply respected and loved.
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| bizi, Fuzzybear
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| Daonnachd, Fuzzybear
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