[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

My husband and I are in a rut. A not so small one. I know he's depressed, but I don't feel I'm in the right frame of mind to be giving him the support he needs. I feel bad about that. Of course I could use support, as well, but I feel I could likely proceed on auto drive. His depression is the deeply sad type, where crying can happen at the drop of a hat. Unless I'm in a mixed episode, mine is more like a feelingless state. Tough, and not as easy to breakdown. Right now he's outside sitting in the sun. He likely wishes I would join him, but I yearn for time to myself. I will go outside in a few minutes, because I know it is the right thing to do.

I'm sorry, Soupe. The situation sounds like a rough road. Would your husband be willing to take an AD? Seems to me that they're most helpful for his type of depression.

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

My husband and I are in a rut. A not so small one. I know he's depressed, but I don't feel I'm in the right frame of mind to be giving him the support he needs. I feel bad about that. Of course I could use support, as well, but I feel I could likely proceed on auto drive. His depression is the deeply sad type, where crying can happen at the drop of a hat. Unless I'm in a mixed episode, mine is more like a feelingless state. Tough, and not as easy to breakdown. Right now he's outside sitting in the sun. He likely wishes I would join him, but I yearn for time to myself. I will go outside in a few minutes, because I know it is the right thing to do.

So sorry to hear that. It’s hard to be there for each other when you are both depressed no matter what type of depression it is. Nice of you to join him.

[Victoria'smom]

Soupe du jour hope you and your husband feel better soon.

[*Beth*]

It sure seems noisy today. People gunning cars, people loudly moving a couch into their apartment. Even the birds are unusually loud today! My car is ready at the shop, supposedly all set to pass smog. My husband (who, because he hadn't eaten lunch yet, was in a rotten mood) is going to take it to be smogged. It took me a lot of years - decades - to learn to ask my husband for assistance, then finally, to tell him "do this, do that" - simply because I ran out of energy and fire. So he can be as cranky as he wants to be, he's still taking my car to be smogged.

Ugh. I wish I was sitting on the beach, peacefully alone.

[Victoria'smom]

I think I almost got kept at my Drs office but they're going to see me in two weeks. I failed the stupid depression test again because it's hasn't been 2 weeks. I was in the room for almost 2 hrs alone with out my meds. They really need to change the wording of the questions.

Other than that I've been aggravated all day. I'm isolating with music. I can't take my chill med and I want to scream.

Seems i'm not the only one having a bad day. I quit both my ZOOM events because they were unbearable. In the first one no one made sense. We're given a quote and asked to discuss it. There's nothing more pathetic than a bunch of mentally ill people trying to be philosophical! In the second they started talking about rabbits eating their own poo and i fled.

It's been crazy windy so i didn't dare go outside until evening when it settled down. I walked to the corner of the block. I didn't want to. With each step i thought of how much pain i will be in tomorrow because of it, feet, shins, lower-back. But none of that matters because we've got to "just do it."

I ate well today tho. I threw out that last bit of Nutella. I'm enchanted with my milk and adoring my veggies. I bought some regular milk today to try as i've been drinking the lactose-free and it's about double the price. I can eat cheese and cream so i should be able to drink regular milk. It's been ages since i drank milk but the lactose bothered me then but it's been years and my stomach is a lot stronger now. We'll see. Experiment. Be a good reality-tester. Mentally ill people tend to be bad reality-testers.

Hugs to all!

[Innerzone]

Been reading, but it's been awhile since posting on this thread. Been having kind of a tough time. Somewhat depressed, but I'm pretty sure it's just situational. Still, no fun. Meeting at work today. Being the scapegoat, those are never fun. Ok, anything to add? I started to speak (after getting my nerve up), and was talked over, and on to next thing. Where I got singled out as doing something I've NEVER done (and of course the source of every mistake). I did rather emphatically respond to that one. I OWN my mistakes. But I'm not going to stand for being accused of things I don't do(!) Sigh. I vented to a coworker after work, and was very thankful for the opportunity. At least he doesn't give me ****.

But I still do absolutely love my studio. 450 sq ft of near perfection.

[buddha1too]

Feeling kind of raggedy. I have a pdoc appointment on the 29th.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Nammu

Ooooooooo I’m pissed. I’ve been trying to buy a bathrobe. There are no longer any clothing stores in my town. Except Wally World. So the first one I ordered was the wrong size. Mum bought it from me. This one I’ve been waiting on for weeks. Not only do they not send a purple royal bathrobe they send some towel like thing that I would never in a million years wear, to boot it’s turquoise! I don’t do blues of any shade. Oooo now I have to ship it back at my expense!

Oooooo I would be mad too.. That is one thing I hate about online shopping if its not what you want etc you have to pay to return it... But I loathe HellMart ( walmart) so I do purchase many things online.

Yes you need a Royal Purple Bathrobe

[~Christina]

Argh it seems we all are dealing with mood instability and health problems on top

Thanks to everyone that has been so kind to me, I try really hard to log on daily but I honestly dont know where my days go

No news about that blood work the Cardiologist ordered so Im guessing it was ok.. I think I have an appt with my Pdoc coming up, I need to call Monday and double check..

My Puppy Gus is spoiled rotten just rotten lol. The other 2 are just as spoiled.

Our weather has been beautiful, Spend most of my time outside with the dogs or hanging on the porch.. Of course the Pollen is gawd awful ! I thank that tiny white pill Claritin for allowing me to survive the season! We have low 80's coming.

I think I am rambling??? Maybe so lol

Hugs and love to everyone

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by buddha1too

Feeling kind of raggedy. I have a pdoc appointment on the 29th.

Less than a week. Of course when your doing badly a weeek sounds very long and unbearable. But you can do it!

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Argh it seems we all are dealing with mood instability and health problems on top

Thanks to everyone that has been so kind to me, I try really hard to log on daily but I honestly dont know where my days go

No news about that blood work the Cardiologist ordered so Im guessing it was ok.. I think I have an appt with my Pdoc coming up, I need to call Monday and double check..

My Puppy Gus is spoiled rotten just rotten lol. The other 2 are just as spoiled.

Our weather has been beautiful, Spend most of my time outside with the dogs or hanging on the porch.. Of course the Pollen is gawd awful ! I thank that tiny white pill Claritin for allowing me to survive the season! We have low 80's coming.

I think I am rambling??? Maybe so lol

Hugs and love to everyone

Glad to hear the weather is gorgeous and you’re spending time outside. That’s one of the best things we can do. I’m glad there’s a pill that makes it possible.

[Nammu]

It’s 5:30 Saturday morning. Couldn’t sleep and was doing so much tossing and turning I was burning up. So decided to see what’s on tv. Beverly hillbillies, Batman bugs bunny ToM and jerry. They brought back the classics.

Caught part of girl interrupted and it bought back memories of state hospitals, kept popping up instead of letting me sleep.

[Soupe du jour]

Hubby and I took another road trip today. We headed south again to the city of Mikulov in southern Moravia, only minutes from the Austrian border and named after Saint Nicholas (Mikulas). There were oodles of flowers, making it quite lovely. It is located in the heart of Czech Republic's wine country, with many vineyards in the area. Attached are a few photos I took today. The cemetery is actually a Jewish cemetery, one of the largest in Czech Republic. Horribly, the Jewish population from there disappeared during WWII. There are graves there likely dating back to the 1400s. It appeared that there were some new ones, from after the war.

Hubby has wanted to get away as a form of escape. He deserves it, and I'm enjoying it, too. However, we do have some important things to do next week. Then next weekend my sister-in-law is visits from near Prague. I'll look forward to that, as well. On May 3rd, there is finally some relaxing of covid restrictions in Czech Republic. I hope it's not premature, but I look forward to it, and hope it helps both Hubby's and my mood.

[Soupe du jour]

Originally Posted by BethRags

It sure seems noisy today. People gunning cars, people loudly moving a couch into their apartment. Even the birds are unusually loud today! My car is ready at the shop, supposedly all set to pass smog. My husband (who, because he hadn't eaten lunch yet, was in a rotten mood) is going to take it to be smogged. It took me a lot of years - decades - to learn to ask my husband for assistance, then finally, to tell him "do this, do that" - simply because I ran out of energy and fire. So he can be as cranky as he wants to be, he's still taking my car to be smogged.

Ugh. I wish I was sitting on the beach, peacefully alone.

Me knowing birds as well as I do, I can confidently say that they are loud because they are also pissed off about the noise.

I hope you get some peace and quiet soon. More in the post just below.

[Soupe du jour]

Innerzone, good for you for standing up for yourself! It's so important.

Nammu, BethRags, Miguel'sMom, thanks for the well wishes and suggestions. My husband does take an antidepressant for unipolar depression, but maybe he does need a little more. He takes Wellbutrin XR. I will say that the days we've gotten out of the house have been restorative, but now home he's literally gone to bed before 8 pm. He needs the rest. As I wrote in my post further above, he's wanting to escape some realities.

Whatever2013, I meant to write yesterday that I found fat-free milk to be a great tool for my past weight loss. I used to drink skim milk lattes or cappuccinos daily, in the morning. They really filled me up. I hope that if you switch back to regular that your tummy will be fine. My husband's lactose intolerant, but he can't eat cheese anymore. Luckily in Czech Republic the lactose free products are reasonably priced. They also sell a greater variety than they do even in the US.

Christina, I hope your bloodwork is OK. I would think if there were very concerning results you might have heard something by now. In any case, I hope you continue to enjoy your time with Gus and the weather. I think such positive therapeutic gifts do wonders for wellness.

buddah1too, I'm glad you have your pdoc appointment coming up. You definitely need the extra support. Hopefully with a little tweaking and support you can stop this negative mood trend.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by buddha1too

Feeling kind of raggedy. I have a pdoc appointment on the 29th.

Probably feels like a long time, but it'll fly by the way the days do, especially as we get older. What do you plan on discussing with your pdoc?

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Nammu

It’s 5:30 Saturday morning. Couldn’t sleep and was doing so much tossing and turning I was burning up. So decided to see what’s on tv. Beverly hillbillies, Batman bugs bunny ToM and jerry. They brought back the classics.

Caught part of girl interrupted and it bought back memories of state hospitals, kept popping up instead of letting me sleep.

I've seen Girl, Interrupted so many times. When it first came out I really enjoyed it...it seemed kind-of moderately heavy, but not overwhelming. Funny thing is, I watched it again recently (after not having seen it for some years). The movie affected me much more deeply this time, almost to a point of not being able to enjoy it.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

Me knowing birds as well as I do, I can confidently say that they are loud because they are also pissed off about the noise.

I hope you get some peace and quiet soon. More in the post just below.

I love the sounds of all the birds around here. I so wish I could name them all. My mother-in-law used to give tours at a local university arboretum; she knew all about the birds. It was fascinating!

Thank you for the pics! The cemetery is amazing, isn't it.

[Nammu]

Soupe I’m glad you got out and that it was a restorative. The pictures are lovely thanks.