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Default May 11, 2021 at 05:52 PM
  #1001
Well I woke up in a really pisssy mood

I mean I have been dealing with the rage-y crap for months and months.. I have a session with my T tomorrow, Should be our last Zoom session. I am soooooooooo over that nonsense. I felt better just doing phones sessions, but the company he works for forced everyone to do Zoom.. Anyway My last session I told Richard that I am just done with Zoom, he understands why I hate it. He isn't a fan of it either. So the next session in 2 weeks will be in person.

My session tomorrow is going to be me basically ranting about what my Pdoc did... He has retired but its the way he handled our last appt that has me in a rage.

Maybe exploding about it to Richard will help me? I dont know

There really isnt any options for me when it comes to psych meds due to diabetes and now heart issues.. So I have to find a way to get back on my feet and find some stability mentally..

My days are just rolling into each other, I honestly cant remember what I did yesterday no lie.. I do wonder if that TIA did actually do damage that hasnt shown on scans? I am just missing so much time. I have no real routine to my days.. I ask my husband often " What did I do yesterday? What have I done today? Who knows ? maybe I shouldn't even care?

Anyway thanks for reading my ramble

Hugs and Love to all !!!

Bleh Bleh Bleh .

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Default May 11, 2021 at 05:54 PM
  #1002
Happy Birthday, Soupe! 50 is great!

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Default May 11, 2021 at 07:05 PM
  #1003
Happy Birthday Jenifer and soupe

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Default May 11, 2021 at 09:02 PM
  #1004
Quote:
Originally Posted by buddha1too View Post
Happy birthday, Jennifer!

Hodně štěstí a zdraví, Soupe!
Here's a Polish birthday anthem for you both! (The Czech song is virtually the same as ours!) My partner's family is 100% Polish & they sing this at birthdays.

"STO-100 LAT" - Polish Birthday Song (Eng. Subs) - YouTube
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Default May 11, 2021 at 09:07 PM
  #1005
I got a ton of paperwork for section 8 done today! Going to my mom's to work on the hardest part tomorrow, though! By the way, the social security offices are closed except for emergencies by appointment only.

I'm tired. I guess that's all.

Happy Birthdays, Jennifer & Soupe!

Getting up early tomorrow. Pdoc is calling at 8-something!

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Default May 11, 2021 at 09:36 PM
  #1006
Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Christina View Post
Well I woke up in a really pisssy mood

I mean I have been dealing with the rage-y crap for months and months.. I have a session with my T tomorrow, Should be our last Zoom session. I am soooooooooo over that nonsense. I felt better just doing phones sessions, but the company he works for forced everyone to do Zoom.. Anyway My last session I told Richard that I am just done with Zoom, he understands why I hate it. He isn't a fan of it either. So the next session in 2 weeks will be in person.

My session tomorrow is going to be me basically ranting about what my Pdoc did... He has retired but its the way he handled our last appt that has me in a rage.

Maybe exploding about it to Richard will help me? I dont know

There really isnt any options for me when it comes to psych meds due to diabetes and now heart issues.. So I have to find a way to get back on my feet and find some stability mentally..

My days are just rolling into each other, I honestly cant remember what I did yesterday no lie.. I do wonder if that TIA did actually do damage that hasnt shown on scans? I am just missing so much time. I have no real routine to my days.. I ask my husband often " What did I do yesterday? What have I done today? Who knows ? maybe I shouldn't even care?

Anyway thanks for reading my ramble

Hugs and Love to all !!!

Bleh Bleh Bleh .

I just want you to know that I'm thinking of you, Christina, and sending love. That last session with your pdoc sounds like it really stung.

I'm SO over teletherapy sessions, too. We're supposed to meet in person starting in July, honestly, I sometimes wonder if I'll make it through 1 more telesession.

BIG hug

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Default May 11, 2021 at 09:43 PM
  #1007
My own odd GP left the clinic early today, so I saw another GP about my 8 day long (thus far) headache. He prescribed Imitrex. I can take 2 of them, but if I still have the damned headache tomorrow I'm supposed to go to the ER. I really don't know what the ER would do that the GP can't. He seemed concerned about my history of high blood pressure. I'm just so over this.

I wrote a letter using an old electric typewriter today. That was a blast from the past!

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Default May 12, 2021 at 04:01 AM
  #1008
Thanks so much for the birthday wishes, my friends! So far today has been lovely, and I know I'll have plenty of calls to come, with birthday wishes. Of course my hubby gave me lots of nice gifts, but I'll admit that the one that was most amazing was that he made homemade bagels for me. I was gobsmacked! We haven't been able to find them in our city in Czech Republic and I was resigned to having to make them myself. I confess that despite my cooking and baking experience, I was a little intimidated about such a task. I never made homemade bagels before. I never dreamed my husband would even attempt such a task, as he never cooks or bakes. They rivaled any from NYC/NJ/Philadelphia, and that's saying something. You can see a picture of them attached. Yes, a couple are little "unique" in shape, but a couple looked perfect and their flavor and texture is perfect.

@buddha1too, I somehow didn't see your birthday message yesterday. Thanks for quoting it, and the well-wishes written in Czech. The song is fun.

Gotta admit that I'm becoming slightly overwhelmed with flowers. So far today, I have received six bouquets. Luckily one came in a vase, and my sister gave me a vase. I literally have only one more taller vase left, a short vase, and then maybe my glass ice bucket. Maybe I won't need them. I do love flowers, though.
Attached Images
File Type: jpg Bagels are beautiful.jpg (345.4 KB, 9 views)

Last edited by Soupe du jour; May 12, 2021 at 06:01 AM..
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Default May 12, 2021 at 06:03 AM
  #1009
Happy birthday Soupe! May the next decade be extra special.
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Default May 12, 2021 at 06:43 AM
  #1010
@Soupe du jour:

H@pPy BiRtHd@Y!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your husbands bagels were a true gift of his love for you! You sound like a great team!

I'm 54 and so far one extraordinarily good thing is menopause! I just officially completed one year without menstruating on Mother's Day Eve. I surely won't miss it. I can wear light-colored pants again! Yay! So far, no other symptoms and far less sensitive to the Winter cold, so that's another plus!

Your plethora of flowers shows that indeed you are loved by many! Putting them in an ice bucket! Haha!

Glad to hear your sick friend is getting some medical attention now, tho it sounds scary. Yes, it sounds like the hospital failed him, neglecting to give him the correct test and turning him away just because his lungs were okay re COVID. I hope the worst is over and he starts improving. I know it's been a source of extreme worry for you.

But try and enjoy your day! I see it's 1:39pm in The Czech Republic now, so not sure if it is still currently your birthday or if i'm belated but at any rate, have a blast or hope you had one!

 
 
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Default May 12, 2021 at 07:12 AM
  #1011
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Originally Posted by whatever2013 View Post
@Soupe du jour:

H@pPy BiRtHd@Y!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your husbands bagels were a true gift of his love for you! You sound like a great team!

I'm 54 and so far one extraordinarily good thing is menopause! I just officially completed one year without menstruating on Mother's Day Eve. I surely won't miss it. I can wear light-colored pants again! Yay! So far, no other symptoms and far less sensitive to the Winter cold, so that's another plus!

Your plethora of flowers shows that indeed you are loved by many! Putting them in an ice bucket! Haha!

Glad to hear your sick friend is getting some medical attention now, tho it sounds scary. Yes, it sounds like the hospital failed him, neglecting to give him the correct test and turning him away just because his lungs were okay re COVID. I hope the worst is over and he starts improving. I know it's been a source of extreme worry for you.

But try and enjoy your day! I see it's 1:39pm in The Czech Republic now, so not sure if it is still currently your birthday or if i'm belated but at any rate, have a blast or hope you had one!

Thanks, whatever2013! It definitely has been a lovely day so far. I'll have my work cut out for me arranging all of the bouquets into arrangements. Hubby made me lunch, which was really more of a dinner meal. It was excellent! He actually has more of a talent for cooking/baking than he thinks. I'm beyond impressed.

I suppose if I get exact about it, my birthday is not even fully reached. It is today (May 12), but I was born sometime around 11:30 am Eastern time.

Last edited by Soupe du jour; May 12, 2021 at 08:31 AM..
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Default May 12, 2021 at 08:22 AM
  #1012
Happy birthday to Soupe and Jennifer!

Sunday and Monday I was terribly depressed. Sunday I also felt super sick after I took my morning meds. I’ve dropped the doxepin, I was too restless. I think that’s why I got so dizzy Sunday morning, because I felt fine yesterday and today.

I wallowed in my bed until about 1pm yesterday until I just couldn’t take it anymore. So I got up and went for a walk. It’s very beautiful out, and should be for the rest of the week. I did feel slightly better after the walk. I also pushed myself to do the dishes and make an easy dinner. I felt a bit better after that.

I had my intake for the program. I’ll be in php for a week or two and then IOP for 8-10 weeks. General adult psych. A voluntary trauma group is available twice a week and I think I’m going to join that too. It’s really the combination of the memory of the trauma plus spring arriving that pushed me over the edge.

Today I feel rather jittery. Like I have to do something. I’ll probably be cleaning the whole house and taking another walk to keep myself busy. I also ordered a set of lanyard cord (also known as gimp). I have to quit the juul soon bc I can’t get the pods online anymore and I can’t purchase menthol pods in my state. I mean I can illegally at the deli but it’s um...sketchy. Smells gross and isn’t clean at all. I think making lanyard keychains will help keep me busy. Theyre easy and mindless and I used to do them to pass the time when I worked at the summer camp.

Jeez I’m hyped. I bought like ten summery tops online. Like $150 worth which is terrible because I don’t know when my disability money will start. I put it on a credit card

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Default May 12, 2021 at 08:35 AM
  #1013
Happy Birthday Soupe! 🎂

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Default May 12, 2021 at 10:42 AM
  #1014
Happy Birthday, Soupe!!

Those bagels look delicious! I was surprised to read you'd never made them. I made them a few times years ago (when I was MUCH better about cooking!) It was very sweet of him to make them for you!

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Default May 12, 2021 at 11:05 AM
  #1015
@christina~ Sending lots and lots of love!! SO much!!

@wildflowerchild25 It sounds like you are doing a lot of the right things to help yourself -- good for you!! I hope things smooth out soon for you. And keeping your hands busy sounds like a good plan.

*********

I've been... a mixed bag. Not as in mixed state, TG, but more like bad spells with mostly basically alright. I cried SO hard yesterday after work. What used to be my favorite job ever has often become emotionally challenging. And once the tears started, everything piled on the "I suck so much" bandwagon.

Physically, it feels like bursitis is acting up in my hip again. It'd been good for so long.

Just trying to keep forging ahead though, yanno?

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Default May 12, 2021 at 04:46 PM
  #1016
The GP prescribed Imitrex for my headache. The instructions were to go to the ER if the headache wasn't gone by today. The Imitrex did relieve the pain for some blessed hours, but it has pretty much returned. The nighttime dizziness is most frightening, though. I have had migraines that lasted a month (or they are many migraines that keep coming during a month's time). I just feel exhausted. I haven't gone to the ER. If the headache is still happening by Friday I will probably go. I took a nap and feel less tired, though. I'm going to give a hardy attempt at doing some laundry.

I am reminded of our discussions on this board about bipolar disorder and migraines.

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Default May 12, 2021 at 04:53 PM
  #1017
We passed 1000 posts so I started a new one, #56

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Default May 12, 2021 at 07:02 PM
  #1018
This is the link for the new thread:

Bipolar check-in #56

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Default May 12, 2021 at 07:52 PM
  #1019
I just ate an entire pint of Ben and Jerry's The Tonight Dough. I never buy ice cream! What's up with me!? I'm watching Grace and Frankie on Netflix. I like this show for some reason.

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