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Elder
Member Since Sep 2008
Location: Scotland, UK
Posts: 5,246
15 85 hugs
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Apr 20, 2021 at 12:38 PM
#1
Last night a few hours before bed I got really paranoid. To the point I couldn't go to the bathroom as it is in my hall where my front door is. My front door is a fire door so I know no-one can get in unless the police were breaking into my house with their big red bulldozer thing. I eventually had to go to the bathroom but I had a baseball bat with me I checked and triple checked the front door it was locked. I left a lamp on as in my head men were going to come into my flat kidnap me, attack me or worse.
Then to top it all off I was plagued with nightmares re a certain world event which didn't affect me in the slightest 1 cause I wasn't born and 2 my family weren't affected by this world event. I had nightmares that men were going to come drag me out my bed, drag me, abuse me, shoot me, kill me in some sense, torture me. Can I say last night all I did for 4 hours before the original paranoia was listen to music so gentle night no issues at all. I don't watch the news after 6pm and I don't read news papers. What is going on? |
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 *Beth*, gina_re, Innerzone, Yaowen
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 *Beth*
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jan 2020
Location: USA
Posts: 3,618
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Apr 20, 2021 at 03:16 PM
#2
Dear Miss Laura,
That sounds so scary. I am sometimes stricken with anxiety which peaks into paranoia. It is such an awful experience. My heart goes out to you. Wish I knew more about such things so I could be helpful. Sincerely yours, Yao Wen |
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Legendary
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Italy
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Apr 20, 2021 at 04:29 PM
#3
So Sorry for what you're going through!
  i agree with the wise and wonderful Yaowen about being So Sorry about this. i am not sure what may be going on - have you been taking your meds as prescribed? Perhaps it may be useful to talk to your pdoc about this. Please do try to keep yourself Safe. Listening to music to sleep better seems like a good idea - perhaps try to read some books as well if you think it can Help you. Sending many Safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @Miss Laura, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!     
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Elder
Member Since Sep 2008
Location: Scotland, UK
Posts: 5,246
15 85 hugs
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Apr 20, 2021 at 04:35 PM
#4
Yes still medicated I get my depot injection on Thurs for anti-psychotic and I take my mood stabiliser twice a day. No idea where it has came from but now to top it off I feel sad. Like proper down. Not depressed just blah. I've been on YouTube and listening to the radio on my TV. Just lying in bed listening to music but nothing is shifting my feelings
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| *Beth*, Innerzone
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Elder
Member Since Sep 2008
Location: Scotland, UK
Posts: 5,246
15 85 hugs
given
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Apr 21, 2021 at 05:29 PM
#5
I told my nurse today re the above she says I just need to rationalise it and keep doing so. I was looking for maybe a med to keep me going but no. She says to look over the anxiety booklet she has given me. That was it. Blah feeling like it was useless as she never said anything I haven't been doing.
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| *Beth*, Innerzone, MamaBear4
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
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Apr 21, 2021 at 07:13 PM
#6
Quote:
I know how discouraging it feels when they tell you to do "this or that", rather than adjust your medication. Especially if you've already been doing what they suggest!
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Elder
Member Since Sep 2008
Location: Scotland, UK
Posts: 5,246
15 85 hugs
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May 17, 2021 at 10:51 AM
#7
Hey guys, an update they are still here and I'm now really struggling and really scared.
I tried calling my nurse today but can't get hold of her. It's nearly 5pm here so she will be finished soon. Last night I was in tears, hot sweats, cold sweats, heart palpitations, scared, feeling sick, frozen inside own body fear of moving.... this has been a near month of struggling. My therapist today suggested I distracted myself at night if I'm up ie clean or something but the more I'm thinking of it I can't move to do it as I'm frozen inside my body as in too scared to moved Any suggestions. Dreading bedtime in next 6 hours |
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| *Beth*, Anonymous41462
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
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May 17, 2021 at 01:04 PM
#8
I so wish I had some suggestions. All I can think of is to fact-check your thoughts, and to focus on your breathing, not on your thoughts. To some degree, I believe your "paranoia" is normal. Unfortunately, every woman I know who lives alone has some fear at night. I certainly do. After I take my garbage outside to the bin I come back and check my closet to be sure no one is hiding in there - I even check behind my shower curtain to be absolutely sure no one is hiding in my bath tub!
I'm so sorry for your predicament. It's certainly not pleasant. __________________ |
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| Anonymous41462
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Miss Laura
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Silver Swan
Member Since Jan 2008
Location: USA
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May 17, 2021 at 08:41 PM
#9
Quote:
__________________ Wellbutrin XL 300 mg Loxapine 50mg Ingrezza 80 mg Ativan .5 mg 2x/day Propranolol 20 mg 2x/day Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) |
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| *Beth*, Anonymous41462
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*Beth*, Miss Laura
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Veteran Member
Member Since Apr 2016
Location: Minnesota USA
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May 18, 2021 at 04:49 AM
#10
Quote:
Would your schedule allow you a sleep shift rotation? Sleep during the day when it's safe feeling, and do your in house activities at night? |
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| Anonymous41462
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Elder
Member Since Sep 2008
Location: Scotland, UK
Posts: 5,246
15 85 hugs
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May 18, 2021 at 06:57 AM
#11
My team want me to keep the sleep for at night as I have tendendancies to slip into a night owl at times. I slept so much better last night though woohoo!!! for me. Although I was still paranoid etc I managed sleep yay!!!
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| *Beth*, Anonymous41462
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Elder
Member Since Sep 2008
Location: Scotland, UK
Posts: 5,246
15 85 hugs
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May 23, 2021 at 03:38 PM
#12
I've started seeing/hearing things. Seeing things like shadows and my mind tricking me that people are in the house. Hearing things like buzzing, bleeping, high pitch noises.... is this all getting too much?
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| *Beth*
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