Living Life in a [Bipolar] Closet

So this is my first time sharing on an online platform but to give enough detail so that readers can be of assistance: I am a nursing school student, I'm a wife, I'm a mom to two awesome little girls and I have been incident-free for 10yrs. In my nursing program, I am currently in a Mental Health course. My family somehow landed in a very small town in the Southeast and as such, stigma and ignorance pervade even amongst healthcare circles. I am under the tutelage of a female instructor, RN, MSN who has a background in teaching Mental Health but is going about it the entirely wrong way. She has a family member who is bipolar and unmanaged on any sort of therapy or medication and she has taken a really negative stance on the disorder. Little does she know that her star student (me) is Bipolar I myself. I've tried to broach the topic with her before but currently, I feel like I'm just sitting the sidelines and living in a closet of my own mental illness. I've never felt so simultaneously appalled and shocked by a situation. I was diagnosed when I was 23 and have managed, with support, my diagnosis very well until now but sitting in a classroom listening to people talk about individuals with bipolar like they have 5 heads and are incapable of intelligent thought is infuriating and I don't know how to educate my instructor or fellow students without disclosing my diagnosis. Please help!

That's a tough one. I've felt judged like that myself, and I don't really know of a good solution. Maybe you could point them to a list of well-known/famous people, like writers, scientists, actors, etc. who are known to be bipolar? That way they can see that bipolar people can live productive and successful lives and can be quite rational and reasonable. But in my experience, getting through to bigots, once they've made up their mind, is unfortunately extremely difficult. I'll let you know if I think of something better.

Thank you for the advice FluffyDinosaur and unfortunately, I have tried these methods with the instructor. Any support though is appreciated. It is most difficult being silent in these types of situations, when the topic arises, because it brings back really horrible flashbacks from hospitalization 10 yrs ago for me. Which if you've ever been through a commitment scenario can be terrifying and life-altering. Thanks for the read and if you think of any of coping or mediating methods please let me know.

Welcome bipolarnurse937!

It's quite likely, as FluffyDinosaur wrote, that you may struggle to change the attitude of your instructor. Frankly, I wouldn't spend that much energy trying to teach her. I'd take what seems valuable from her and ignore the rest. What's important is that you understand the struggles of people with mental health disorders. You have the great experience and knowledge of how to live well with the disorder. You can use that valuable knowledge and experience (and the good stuff you can learn from the instructor) to be the best nurse possible. With that you will surely make a positive difference in others' lives you touch in the future. I am happy that there will be such a wonderful nurse, as you!

I have experienced stigmatic behavior from mental healthcare providers, as well as from others. Once I took an adult school class focusing on "clearing clutter in life". It was taught by a psychologist. On two occasions she equated having bipolar disorder with being an abusive person. Knowing others in the class may not know much about the disorder, I had to speak up against her ignorant comments. One might even wonder how/why bipolar disorder even came up in such a class. That psychologist teacher was venting about her mother who had the disorder. [Not that venting/demonizing about her mom was even appropriate there.] I'll even venture to say that that psychologist instructor may have been hypomanic/manic when teaching the class, based also on her other behaviors. This all concerned me greatly enough to provide private feedback to the adult school director. Of course I did not try to diagnose HER in my letter to the director, but did mention the abnormal/concerning behaviors, which spoke for themselves. From my observation, at least one other student may have provided similar feedback. Yes, sometimes there comes a time when stigmatic behavior needs to be reported. However, in this incidence, the behavior was severely out of line. I would not have reached out if it was milder in nature, said in passing, or perhaps just once (and not accompanied by other concerning behavior). I felt talking to the psychologist instructor, directly, would not yield any good, given her behavior.

Thank you so much for the insight and the personal experience. The whole situation puts you in an awkward and foreign place, being bipolar yourself. I really appreciate your kind words. It's been harder than I realized it would but you make a good point about utilizing in order to learn how to better care for future patients.

Welcome to boards, bipolarnurse937!

I wish I had any advice for you. I'm so newly diagnosed that I havent really told anyone specifically because I'm afraid of the stigmas people will have in knowing I'm bipolar. Even my own mother has her stigmas and thinks that anytime I get mad, I'm getting "hypey".

It seems to me that people in this profession would understand more about this disorder and know that with medication and therapy, that people work hard to maintain "normal" lives and would never know this is something we live with. Just because one person in their life might not have it under control, it doesnt mean the entire population is the same way.

I think Soupe du Jour said it best - take the helpful, constructive things she says and as difficult as it is, let the negative, side opinions slide off.

I think that you are doing amazing, to be becoming a nurse, being a mom and working on yourself to have this disorder under control. You really should feel quite proud of youself.

I agree with all the other posters here to just ignore the negative things that come from your instructor. We can't easily change people's ideas, but it is indeed exasperating. I'm not very good at holding back my anger when I feel like I'm being judged or insulted. It's not because I'm bipolar but that's part of my character.


I just want to share even though it's not directly related. In my country, I just assume no one knows about bipolar disorder. Many of my doctors (gynecologist, ophthalmologist, etc.) don't know what bipolar disorder is. Some people here who know about bipolarity saw it in movies, so their idea is that people with bipolar disorder are usually violent and dangerous. They only see on the news that some famous actors go to jail because they attack people when they are manic. Even the staff at the office of persons with disabilities here don't have any idea. One of them asked me, "So, how are you bipolar? Like what do you do?" I didn't answer because I didn't understand what he wanted to hear. His supervisor heard him and scolded him in front of me.

I don’t really have anything to add, but from one bipolar nurse to another—Welcome!!🤗